LITERATURE.

Globe, Volume IX, Issue 1201, 9 January 1878, Page 3

LITERATURE.

AN APPALLING APPETITE.

[From “ Tinsley’s Magazine.” j (Concluded.) ‘Mine coote Montam Bawl,’ he says, ‘I dzink to-morrow 1 vill eat dzee lleish auppo —live pounds ox, five pounds calf, five pounds shoe]), dzree pounds shwiuo lleish, mid dzee lleish of twelf slacken, vich you gut shmall, und shtows dzem in one pig bot, mid garrotsh, creen peas, und dzee dobs of twelf pundles of sbarrowerass. No vasser, pot dzree pottlesh Marcobruuner und too pottles Johanuisberger - vich make dzeo suppe rich. For mine fishes, von peck of dzee leetel videpate, von sammon, von turpot, und von dutzend schollen —vat you gall, dzee f*ouh’

By this time poor Grasper is well-nigh choking with rage and grief, but he dares nob even murmur, for fear lest he should incur a heavy line for interfering with his boarder's appetite. * For mine Braton—vat you gall dzee roast shoiut —I vill have dzee Kalbsbraten—vat you gall dzee weal, and dzee Frenshman dzee veau, vence gomes dzee broverp, “Gome weal, gome woe.” ’ ‘What joint of veal would you like, sir?’ says Mrs Fall. ‘ Dzee four quarters,’ replied Herr Allgut. * The fore quarter, you mean, sir ? ’ inquires Mrs Fall. ‘ It ist not coot grammar, Montam Bawl. Yon quarter ist von quarter, two quarters ist two quarters, und four quarters ist four quarters, vich it ist von calf; mi l vich I vanish von ham of fifteen pounds, und twenty-four marrow-tumplius.’ * Don’t you think twenty-four duiuplhjgs too much ? ’ says Mrs Pall doubtfully. ‘ If you dzink twenty-four; tiynpljms too mosh, make for mo only' twenty mid zee marrow, hot make' dzee twenty von lectel pit pigger, tyuad pyo I vill dzink of some ozias icctei things, Montam Bawl.’ ‘ Wouldn't you like some oysters and lobster-salad, licrr Allgut ? ’ blandly inquires Mrs Fall, to Q-raspcr’s iutcusest disgust. The miser, not daring to give vent to his feelings, fiercely shakes his fist behind his back at Mrs Fall. ‘Oystbers ist nishe, 1 says the German briskly, ‘ und lopstersh ist nishe. I dzink I vill eat twelf dutzend of dzee leetell, leetell

native, and von dutzend of dzee piled lopstersh in dzee zallats.’ Here the unhappy miser groans. 4 Ist you daken pad in your inzides, mine cooter froind, Mishtare Crashbare ?’ inquires Herr Allgut, with deep ineerest 4 No, no,’ snarls Grasper. 4 A sudden spasm, that’s all.’ Then muttering to himself, ‘Curse you, you monstrous glutton! I only wish 1 were in your inside for live minutes, I’d spoil yur appetite for you for evermore, I’ll warrant.’ ‘ You rausht not croan, mine cooter froind, Mishtare Crashbare.’ It indervere mid mine appeeteet, vich ist preaches of govenance. you know.’ Had poor Grasper gone into the scales before and after any of these scenes he would certainly always have found his weight one pound at least less than before. But this was not the sum-total of Grasper’s misery. From the earliest dawn of day to the latest hour of night the German would be up and about the house, and he would, with perverse persistence, always somehow, by himself or through his followers, contrive to intrude upon Grasper in a fashion which made it almost impossible for the master of the house to have even half a minute’s private interview with his ward, to whom Herr Allgut would make tierce love in a grotesque way before Graspers eyes, leering at her amorously through his blue glasses pressing his hand on his heart, blowing kisses to her, and bursting into snatches of Ge r mau doleful love-songs, until the old man was ready to burst with vexation and rage. And the slightest attempt at even tho mildest remonstrance on his part was at once resented by the German as an insidious endeavour to interfere with his appetite. * Vich ist preaches of govenance, you know,’ he warned his cooter friend, Mishtare (. rashbare

Little Florence seemed to take a delight in encouraging Her Allgut’s addresses, and she sweetly smiled upon the eccentric German, who, when not actually busy with his meals, divided his time pretty equally between open declarations of his ‘bassionate loaf ’ of Miss Walden and copious draughts of most expensive wines, of which he would make a couple of bottles seemingly disappear with marvellous expedition every halfhour or so of the day. And, as poor Grasper found to his grief and cost, it was not the least use to try (.0 palm inferior sorts upon him. He need merely smell the cork to know at once the wine and the year of the vintage. Charlie Blinker found the task imposed upon him by his patron the reverse of easy. There was a complicated safety-lock to the door of Grasper’s room, and a more complicated one still to the Florentine cabinet in it, which was also plentifully stored with most ingeniously-contrived secret recesses At last, after a month’s patient watching and study, Charlie succeeded in his undertaking, He found and took what he wanted, and carried it to the inn to Mr Grainger, who somehow always managed to come down just whtn his presence was required. In the afternoon of that day Domber received from Walter Grainger’s hand the written confession extorted from him many years back by Grasper, and his app intment to the stewardship of the Greenlauds estate. Charles Slinker had five hundred pounds given to him to enable him to begin a new life in America.

Dr. Reynolds, who had judiciously kept out of Grasper’s way, thought the time had come for trying a daring and decisive experiment upon his victim. He sent him word the same afternoon to meet him, if convenient, at the inn where he was staying. When Grasper received this message he was in a truly pitiable state. He had just cast up his accounts for the last month, and he had come to the sad conclusion that five years of this must inevitably end in his utter ruin ; for not only was this horrid brute f .st eating away his substance, but the incessant contemplation of his own misery was beginning to affect his mind, and to make him unlit for the proper and profitable pursuit of his business. His despair was conjuring up dark thoughts in his brain—thoughts of murder, which boded no good to the German inmate of his house.

He eagerly responded to Reynolds’s invitation, with his mind in a dangerously receptive and plastic condition, Ju reply to his bitter reproaches that he, the sou of his old schoolfellow, had vilely plotted to plant this infernal locust (Allgut) on his substance, who was now devouring him root and branch, flesh and bone, Reynolds replied, with an injured air, ‘ 1 must protest against this language, Mr Grasper. I made no false representation to \o'. I warned }on explicitly and distinctly that the man had an inordinate appetite.’ ‘ Inordinate I’ shouted Grasper, ‘ inordinate ! Appalling, sir, appalling :' * ‘Not more so, surely, r,ir. Grasper, than your own craving gold,’ ‘Jeer on. young man,’ replied Grasper, with tears in his voice, ‘jeer on. I must even bear it.’

‘ Well, my dear sir, you will not contest that ten thousand pounds in a lump is a large sum of money to pay for a man’s keep. ’ ‘ A man, indeed ! An ogre, sir, a ghoul 1 But why have you sent for me ?’ ‘ To talk reason to you, Mr Grasper. Look here, sir, I think I have found out the nature of Herr AUgut’s abnormal craving for food and drink ; and I believe there is a way to cure him, albeit a perilous way. This abnormal craving is casually connected with a functional disorder of skin, which makes all solids and liquids he takes incontinently turn to gas in him, and so go off in insensible perspiration. Now there is a remedy for this, but it is a most heroic and dangerous remedy—a formidable poisou, indeed —qrsenic, to wit, with just one chance out of a hundred that it will not kill the patient outright. Arsenic is very fashionable just now, especially in cases of consumption—’ ‘ Try it on him, try it on him, my dear Eeyntudia !; Surely there cannot be a worse ease of consumption than bis. Kill—cure ipim, 1 mean—cure him, my dear Reynolds, and the sooner the better.’ ‘ What will you give me if I—cure him?’ asked the doctor slowly, and with the coolest deliberation. 1 A thousand pounds aud my eternal gratitude !' shouted Grasper. At this juncture the door of an inner appartment opened, and in walked Herr Allgut, flaming with angry passion, followed by old Mr. Grainger, Sir Richard Grccnlands, and Domber. ‘ Vat for you gonsbire to bisen mine iozides ?’ be cried iudiguantly. ‘ Jt is a plant, a vile plant ! I see it all now,’ howled Grasper, nearly beside himself with terror and rage. 4 Blind fool that 1

have been, not to see through this from the first! But you,’turning to Bomber, ‘shall smart for tbis. The world shall know you for what you are !’ He was rushing off madly, when the solicitor placed a Hrm detaining hand upon him. ‘ Not so fast, Mr Grasper,’ he said calmly. ‘ The document extorted by you from this unhappy victim of your craftv villany is no longer in existence ; and,’ holding up a deed, ' you see that 1 am in possession also of the bond which you had so basely purloined. Under these circuit stances, you will readily understand that an application will at once, even without Miss Walden’s assent —or, if necessary, against her will-be made to the Lord Chancellor to place the young lady under a more trustworthy guardian. How Herr Allgut may here choose to proceed, I know not ’ Grasper looked liv ; d. He felt that he had been outwitted in every way, and that he was helplessly in the toils. ‘ls there no way of preventing a public scandal ?’ said Sir Richard, coming forward. ‘ Suppose, Mr Grasper, you give your consent to your ward’s marriage with me, in consideration of my engaging to drop all notion of proceeding in Chancery, and to relieve you, in addition, from your somewhat onerous bargain with Herr Allgut—provided, of course, that gentleman will consent to the exchange, and on his part drop all proceedings against you.’ ‘I gousent,’ ciied the German. ‘Mine ley veu ist in too mosh creat tanger mid mine coote froind Mistare Crashbare.’ 4 1 gladly and willingly consent!’ shouted Grasper impetuously. 4 Anything to be freed from this monstrous glutton !’ 4 Monshdrous cluttou !’ murmured Herr Allgut musingly. ‘ 1 dziuk it ist preaches of govenance.’ The solicitor, meanwhile, like the thorough man of business he was, proceeded incontinently to have the whole matter settled in black and white. The papers had been prepared in anticipation of the event. He placed them before tho parties in the room to sign, as principals or as witnesses. When it came to Herr Allgut’s turn, that genii * man signed 4 Walter Grainger,’and, tearing off’ his flaxen wig and moustache and removing the blue glasses, stood revealed to his amazed friends and to the ineffably disgusted Grasper in the person of the young bar ister who had contrived the plot.