A SCHOOLBOY ON CORNS.

Globe, Volume VIII, Issue 954, 16 July 1877, Page 3

A SCHOOLBOY ON CORNS.

Corns are of two kinds -vegetable and animal. Vegetable corn grows in rows; animal corn grows on toes. There are several kinds of corns ; there is the unicorn, capricorn, corn dodgers, held corn, and the corn which is the corn you most feel. It is said, I believe, that gophers like corns : bat persons having corns do not like to “ go fur,” if they can help it. Corns have kernals, and some colonels have corns. Vegetable corns grow on ears, but animal corns grow on the feet at the other end of the body. Another kind of corn is tire acorn; these kind of corns grow on the oaks, but there is no hoax about the corn. The acorn is a corn with an indefinite article indeed. Try it and see. Many a man when he has a corn wishes it was an acorn. Folks that have corns sometimes send for a doctor, and if the doctor himself is corned, he probably won’t do so well as if he isn’t. The doctor says corns are produced by tight boots and shoes, which is probably the reason why when a man is tight they say he is corned. If a farmer manages well, he can get a good deff of corn on an acre, but I know a farmer who has a corn that makes the biggest acher on his farm. The bigger crop of vegetable corn a man raises the better he likes it; but the bigger crop of animal corn the better he does not like it. Another kind of corn is the corn dodger. The way it is made is very simple, and is as follows—that is if you want to know :—You go along the street and meet a man you know has a corn, and a rough character ; then you step on to the toe that has a corn on it, and see if you don’t have occasion to dodge. In that way you will find out what a corn dodger is.