THE LOAFER IN THE STREET.

Globe, Volume VIII, Issue 877, 17 April 1877, Page 3

THE LOAFER IN THE STREET.

(From tl\" Press-) Foremost among \yarpicirs in the crusade against the ((emon Drink is Mr Fox. It is sometimes my pleasing duty to run over files of Colonial papers, and on lliesc oecasions ] generally come across Mr Fox reasoning on temperance [and judgment to come on the drinkers. In a speccli recently made by liini at "Wanganui, Mr Fox was very hard on the medical profession and (lie fourth estate. He observed Uiut it was reyy hard to get at the real cause of a man's death if alcohol were til all responsible for it. The doctors, the coroner's juries, the newspapers were tdl ver\ careful not to attribute if to liquor. " If a man," said Mr Fox, " comes out of a public house drunk, and gets drowned in a ditch, the jury get out of the difliculty by a verdict of 'Asphyxia, 1 and the papers wind up with a reference to deceased being much lamented by a large circle of friends. English papers

please copy." There is an amount of information conveyed in the above remarks as startling to mo as it will probably be to the coroner's juries, (lie doctors, and the editors. So far as one can judge from the published reports of the proceedings of the Board of Education, their correspondence does not contain much funnimenf. There arc exceptions to every rule, however, and the recent letter of the chairman of the New Brighton School Committee is certainly one. Tin's gentleman thinks that the fact of the schoolmaster being also a ranger places him in a very anomalous position. 1 don't what inference the Board drew from this statement, but the most natural one is certainly that poachers are numerous in New Brighton. In the same letter the chairman objects to ratepayers being Jfrcated to bread and beer at. school elections. Arc wc to gather from this that the votes of New Brighton olectors are influenced by bread and beer. What a, garden of Benderineer New Brighton must be for candidates !

In the enquiry column of an English newspaper 1 come across the following : "Australia and South Africa. —P.W. : —I am thinking about proceoding to South Africa or Australia shortly, and shall be obliged by hints from any of your readers as to the best kind of goods to take out to these colonies, which are likely to meet with a ready sale. Any information will be appreciated," If P.W. means Africa, I should think Dutch courage would be the most saleable article there. They seem a little short of it. If Australia or New Zealand P.W. need only bring himself. I should say from his enquiry he would be just as readily sold as anything he could bring. A contemporary of yours very rightly wires into the recent case at Pigeon Bay, where- — but its such an old story. Only in this case the drinker only knocked down a checpie he had not got. In reference to it your contemporary observes —"Given an impecunious sot with a craving for drink and an accommodating publican, is it any wonder that crime is the result?" No; but the impecunious sot and the accommodating publican arc characters that are rarely cast in the same piece. A case at the last sessions induces the enquiry upon what principle arc appointments made at present by a paternal Government. A gentleman in Akaroa held it would appear the appointments o,f sub-collector of Customs, postmaster, and clerk of the Resident Magistrate's Court. I should say — " Still the wonder- grow,

How one small head could carry all lie knew," and carry it for the consideration of C 3 a Ayeek, I suppose what ever is is right, but the salary does not appear as if tho Government were carrying out the principle of "to him that hath much much shall he given." I don't wonder ho gut a bit mixed, Talking of Akaroa, | never remember seeing the following story of the Mayor, until I saw if in the pages of a Southern contemporary ! —A vote of want of confidence in his Worship of Akaroa was lately put to the votes of the members of the Akaroa Council, and the voting was even. " Such being the ease," said the Mayor, " I shall vote for myself like a man," and he declared the motion lost. I feel quite sure from the action of his Worship that the want of confidence was undeserved. For the future tlie Akaroa Councillors will have more faith.

The following touching appeal from a bereaved parent is from a Wisconsin peper: -—" Stolen, from the residence of Abel Crowfoot, the proprietor of the Fremont. Mills, their eldest daughter, Thirzah. If tlie sneaking thief will return her to her happy former homo, and not drag her into misery with himself any further, lie will be suitably rewarded by being set up in the boot business in good shape." One would so much like to know whether the sneaking thief preferred boots to beauty. The following is the synopsis of an entertainment recently given down South : ; —"Mr H. A. Severn's Popular Lectures. —For-one-flight only. Subject.. —The Earth and its Satellite. —Bho,to>s. o,f the Moan, its maun* tains and Qra.tc.rs, To, conclude with Oxyhydmgcu Microscope, Kaleidoscope, Views in Eurqpe, America, Egypt, New Zealand, Annuals, Statuary, Aninialcuhe, the Lead Tree. Radiometer. Admission, 3s, 2s, Is. Children half price." If the lecture were at all in keeping with the varied character of tho subjects, tlie show must have been a good one. That it appeal's to, have found favor at tho hands of sc\me of your southern contemporaries, I gather from the fact that at a recent juvenile fancy-dress ball, held in Duncdin, the dress of a young lady representing the Fourth Estate, was printed with extracts from tlie various journals of Now Zealand,, including a notice of Mr Severn's scientific lecture. To the authority from whom I learn tin's, I am indebted also for the following sentence, apropos of the fancy-dress ball above referred to :—" Many of the leading characters of history were represented, among others Lady Teazle, Lurlinc, Sir Walter Raleigh, Little Red Riding Hood, Raphino, Rowena, and Queen of tlie Fairies." That all the above wore historical characters, was an illusion I lost early in life. I am, however, glad to get it restored to me. The following are items charged in a bill for carriage, and picked up by a friend : ■'2 pkges, 4 blokes, 1 iron rod, 1 monkey, 1 cross kidd." The assortment is not such a curious one as woidd appear at first, sight, for the second and last items wijl ho noticed by old travellers as wmpagnans die voyage, and assuming the monkey to bo tied to the irp.ii rod, and the pkges to contain refreshment for the 4 blokes, and a gag for the crass kidd, the assortment is a very well arranged one, "This is a world of parting," as the metallician observed on a sad settling for the ring. It is not always flic sweetest sorrow cither. I fancy tho Mayor of Wellington is rather of this opinion. From a recent telegram, it would appear that when Abolition took place, the distribution of charitable aid was given over to the chief civic dignitary of Wellington, who dashed it about, right royally. On the subsidy being paid over to tho Corporation he was disgusted to find that body debited with the lot. He won't part any more now, and thinks the text which commences "to do good and to distribute forget not," lias no application to Mayors, who derive the needful from the General Government. This is how a Knightly Roniface in the Sunny Isles of (.he Pacific advertises his Restaurant :—" The Hawaiian Hotel lunch room is open, under the management, of R. Von Oehlhaffen. All delicacies known to the age constantly kept on hand, and served to surpass the past, arrest the present, and stereotype the future— guaranteed to satisfy the epicure in his wildest dreams. Weddings, dinners, and all other private and public orders will lie executed in my usual elevated style.—Robert Vou Oehlhaffen, manager."