SATURDAY NIGHT SKETCHES

Globe, Volume V, Issue 592, 12 May 1876, Page 2

SATURDAY NIGHT SKETCHES

AMONGST THE CHEAP JOHNS. [By a Bohemia*?.] [No L] In all parts of the old country the Cheap John has long been a recognised institution, but it is only of late that in this distant part of the world that the fraternity have set up their stand, and I propose to sketch, if but faintly, the humors and fancies of this peculiar class of tradesmen of which the Kinchin, in Mr Bucks cone's drama of " The Flowers of the Forest " is a type. For a while, therefore, courteous reader, let me, metaphorically of course, take you under my guidance while introducing you to some of the lights and shadows of Christchurch life on a Saturday night. We are under the walls of the slow growing Cathedral; the asphalte pavement is crowded! with pedestrians, most of them bearing the inevitable basket, which is the sure mark of recognition of the married man. To the right of us brays a brass band, and the juvenile portion of the community are evidently,

judging from their. shouts of laughter, having a good time of it on the velocipedes, which constitutes that queerly named entertainment, which has located on the we3tern side of the square. But it is not there that I would take you, but to a building forming part of that splendid block facing the Bank of New Zealand, the architecture of which must at once convince a stranger that he has landed in a city where high art is studied. The front windows are festooned in an artistic manner with various articles of clothing which have seen better days, and which could, if they were endowed with voice tell many a romantic history. One portion is devoted to jewellery which, under the flaring gas looks tempting enough, and there is quite a crowd assembled gazing eagerly upon it. Youths of various ages look wistfully at the treasures displayed and for some blissful moments imagine them, selves the proud possessor of the cable-like chain or glittering rings which lie in such profusion before them, Near here a man with stentorian lungs and a bell of power, upon which he performs a vigorous solo, invites all and sundry to walk up and be in time for the bargains which are now being given away. Bargains 1 The very word has a charm alike for the thrifty housewife and the sterner sex and a stream of would-be purchasers sets steadily in Let us join them and see what food we can gather for our note-book. A long, low shed lighted but dimly—for too bright a light would not be advantageous to the wares—crowded to excess with all kinds of people and in the centre a voluable gentleman who has a word for every one, and a stock of chaff which is inexhaustible. Before him on a sort of counter is aheterogeuous collection ofarticles, which makes one wonder how they could possibly be collected together, and still more who buys the-n. Take a look round at the audience There in a corner, halfhidden by the burly shoulder of her husband, is a mechanic's wife, who has been tempted by the bargains offered, and is making purchases of a varied character, from a shawl for herself to boots for the latest addition to the f amity; Well in front you may be sure are several specimens of the genus larrikin, who chaff the salesman with great glee, and with all his knowingness he does not get much the best of it. In the outer circle are the loungers, who like ourselves, have dropped in to spend half an hour. Of course the gentleman for whom the last half-pint of Colonial has proved too much is not absent. There he is propped against one of the uprights, making remarks as to the quality of the goods submitted, and in a loud tone which is somewhat irritating to our friend who is officiating at the counter. Ultimately he is removed forcibly by a henchman of the establishment bearing a strong family likeness to the salesmen, and business proceeds briskly. A heap of hats of all sizes, colours, and makes are thrown down by the assistant on the counter, and our friend commences volubly to expatiate on their quality. Selecting a quiet looking rustic he appeals to him whether he does'nt think his young lady would be proud of him were he to invest the ridiculously small sum of a shilling in the purchase of one of these hats, and appear before her to-morrow in all the glory of a new hat. Whether it presents itself in the same light to the rustic mind I know not, but the result is a commercial transaction, and the purchaser steps forward to the counter and is fitted with a hat amid the audible comments of the onlookers. The ice once broken, it is remarkable the number of persons who discover suddenly that they want a hat, and the assistant has a busy time of it in supplying the numerous applicants, the salesman meanwhile indulging in a running commentary sometimes not complimentary to the personal appearance of the purchaser. Selectling a shawl from, a heap of goods lying mixed up before him, and deftly holding it to display it to the best advantage, he again proceeds to descant upon the quality of the article, interspersing his remarks with a few anecdotes of his own career, which cause a laugh. Once he has fot his auditory in a good humour, he knows is sal eis safe, Starting at a high figure by slo w degrees he descends, until presently a roughlooking gentleman, who has evidently been seeing wild life during the evening and thinks that this will be a propitious offering to bis missus, becomes the purchaser, amid the chaff of the larrikins, who I may say take a keen interest in every lot sold. The mechanic's wife, before spoken of, takes another, and after one or two more are got off the sale flags, and our friend introduces a new line. This time it is jewellery, and to hrar his description of is a treat. From this one would imagine that instead of being purely of home manufacture, it had come from the ateliers of the first Paris jewellers. Messieurs the larrikins again come to the front and boldly express their doubts as to the genuineness of the article. This, however, does not disturb the equanimity of our friend, for giving a shot or two at his junevile assailants, he continues his eulogium. But all his eloquence is thrown away; the jewellery does not go off, and it is put on one side. A variety of other articles are brought out and the process is repeated ad infinitum until the audience gradually thins, and the hour growing late finally disperse, the purchasers carrying off their bargains in triumph—a triumph which, let us hope, an inspection by daylight next morning does not dispel. We are again on the asphalte which is now somewhat deserted, and so good night courteous reader, and on another occasion we will visit the less pretentions establishments of those who ply their vocation in the open air.