THE PEANUT MAN.

Globe, Volume V, Issue 532, 2 March 1876, Page 3

THE PEANUT MAN.

He had his little cart on the street corner, and as he blew the frost out of his fingers he cried—

' Peanuts ! Peanuts! right from the oven !'

He was standing thus when a stout-built woman, with her hands encased in red mittens and her bonnet poised in jaunty style, came around the corner, saw him, and with a sharp ' 'oop !' she rushed forward and throw her arms around him.

' Bobbers ! pickpockets !' he yelled, trying to break away. ' Oh, Robert, it is you—it is you !' she exclaimed.

' Where are the police ?' he shouted. ' It is me, Eobert—it is your wife !' • Not by a jug full, old woman ! Now you just go away from here.' ' Robert Piper, don't try to play that game any further,' she warned ; ' I have tracked you from Canada, and now you are going back with me to support your family and behave yourself!'

' I don't know you !' he replied, seeming greatly astonished. ' Don't lie to this crowd, Robert! Weren't we married eighteen years ago, and haven't we five children, and didn't you cut sticks three weeks ago and leave us to starve?' ' Gentlemen, may Ibe hung if I ever saw that woman before, and 'ere's your fresh roasted peanuts !' 'Come here, darling,' she said, backing out of the crowd a little.

' You are drunk or crazy, and 'ere you get your nice hot peanuts.' ' Bobby, Bobby!' she cried, crooking her finger. ' I'l have the police " Bobby " you, if you don't go away; and now, gents, these peanuts are just out of the roaster !' ' Then you'll go back on your poor wife in a land of strangers, will you V she asked, as she approached him. ' Never saw you before, you old lunatic, and those peanuts are the best that Virginia soil can grow!' ' Bobby!' she said, as she reached over and took him by the necktie—'Bobby, this America is no place for you! It's awful unhealthy here, and the climate goes agin a man's tellin' the truth. Come along * Bobby!' And she gave him such a twist that he came down on his knees. He bit her hand to loosen his hold, and she cuffed him right and left, saying : ' I never saw a man run down hill as you have in three weeks! Take that, Bobby, and that! and that! and now come over to Canada with me !'

' I never saw you before—you're drunk—police !' he shouted, as he got up. ' Never saw me, Bobby—don't you know the woman who lived Avith you for eighteen years ?' And as she proceeded to make his ears ring he broke away, dashed through the crowd, and cantered away.

Now, gentlemen, said the woman, turning to the crowd, ' help yourself to peanuts and git out'n my way, for I'm going to run him down if it takes me a week of steady jogging!' And she cantered after him.