DOTTINGS OF A DEMOISELLE.

Globe, Volume I, Issue 5, 5 June 1874, Page 2

DOTTINGS OF A DEMOISELLE.

To the Editor of the Globe.

Dear Sir, —If I introduce myself as a young lady of literary tastes—name and carte de visite enclosed —I hope it will be sufficient to induce you to publish the following remarks upon things in general. I could truthfully subscribe myself a constant reader of the daily papers for the last three years, and have sought in vain for any news affecting the interests of ladies. Politics, municipal matters, sporting, and what I always am led to consider are ironically called matters of local interest, are treated of to the extent of columns, while the feminine interests seem to be neglected in what I must say seems a very ungallant style. Let me hope in the cause of my sex that you will in this, your new paper, endeavor to rectify this glaring omission, and I for one will be most happy to assist you in the attempt. Oh ! I’m so sorry the opera’s gone. There was a fund of amusement for me, apart from the performance, in watching the faces of my own dear sex who were in full costume—never a move, not a muscle relaxed ; in fact, I think they forgot and thought they were in church. A friend of mine was wicked enough to insinuate that perhaps these ladies were afraid of their back hair tumbling off, if they shook with laughter ; and if they smiled, their enamel might crack. Now, wasn’t that unkind ? Do you know, 1 nearly quarrelled with Mr X (for of course no one but a man could be so ill-natured) for saying such a cruel thing. I think my idea showed much more feeling, don’t you ? Of course I laughed, and, I’m afraid, very loudly sometimes; but then, you know, every one excuses me, for I’m really so peculiar. Hoyyever, I was advised the next time any amusements came, to get papa to let n?e go in the pit. There you can laugh to your heart’s content (and cry too if you like variety). I’m beginning to understand, now, why actors play to the pit so often. It is so much less trouble to amuse ft; and it really docs applaud sometimes. By-the-bye, what a lot of hats are worn now a Iq, Mrs Rousby, saves vans, Mr Editor ? Well, allow me to explain. You know, of course, that Mrs Eousby is a very pretty actress at home ; and they called these hats after her. They happened to suit her first class ; but they don’t suic everybody —to wit, me and lots of others X see wear ug them. Why will my charming but enighted sex insist upon making thenselves look hideous ? We cannot all be Mrs Rousbys, can we ? It wouldn’t well if we could ! Men like variety, ray dear.” That’s what I say to my my pretty sister Betty; men like variety. Why, you should see me. I’m awfully plain for this generation. Perhaps if I lived in the next I might be called good-looking, Fashion changes so. I’ve got such a lot of hair that I can’t make room fora bit of false; no, not even a plait; and Jmy skin, oh, dear me, it’s such a nasty brown one,, that pearl |

cream won’t do it any good at all. Well, now, can I be a pretty girl with those things against me—two principal ones, too. It’s no use saying that my features are “ item,” as Olivia says : “ two lips indifferent red ; item, two grey eyes, with lids to them ; item, one neck, one chin ; and so forth.” The only thing that is nice is ray name, and that I’ll tell you bye-and-bye. I get heaps of partners at balls and parties. It may be because men like to see such a pretty name on their programmes, but I fancy I’ve rather wandered from the hats, haven’t I ? What is the reason that the ladies of Christchurch never attend either regattas, cricket, football, or athletic sports? I have a young brother who goes in for what journalists delight to call muscular Christianity ; and he complains bitterly on this subject. Now for myself, I love all the above-mentioned sports, and attend them regularly, finding myself almost always the only representative of my s x. I think I have heard a great deal of talk in Christchurch about young men frequenting bars and billiard-rooma, and I imagine if ladies would only show more interest in these out-door sports, it would do a greAt deal towards remedying a habit that, adcording to some of your correspondents to the Press, is a growing evil. Besides, such occasions afford a good chance to exhibit those pretty walking costumes, which time after time appear in our fashion plates, and which we cannot use in general promenade in town for reasons, chiefly because many of these said costumes were designed for fetes of some kind or other, and would look out of place in the small streets of our colonial home. I had intended in my first communication to avoid what mamma calls frivolity, and to keep away from the subject of dress, a difficulty, I must confess, to be be almost insuperable to the feminine tongue, I promise you, however, that my next communication will be as serious as the most matter of fact of your leaders ; or as papa is when we exceed our allowance.

I am, ray dear sir, Yours very sincerely, DOLLY VARDEN.