Grim Humor.

Gisborne Times, Volume VIII, Issue 562, 4 November 1902, Page 4

Grim Humor.

The following poem is a sample of the humorous efforts in drought-stricken Australia : Lay down your pick and shovel, Throw up your spade and pen, Good-bye to graft and grovel— Good morning, Gentlemen Our game shall bo to borrow, And owe and pay our way, God bless tho good to-morrow, And never mind to day. Is there a man so rude ns To say that we are poor V Hang up tho cvnwl'ng Judas And make that question sure. All through tho Never-Never The streams run full and deep. The waters flowing over Are thirsting for the sheep. It was a white, weird battle : Between the rain and ran Ten thousand head of cattle Were bleaching on the plain. But all the whole land over The grass grew green and sweet, The cattle rolled in clover— The cattle would not eat. Who dares to put in print that Tho tilings we say are lies ? Who dares to merely hint that This is not Paradise ? Work? Work? 0 leave or lump it, Each man upon his own But- hear the golden trumpet : 11 A Loan ! A Loan! A Loan ! ”

Lay down your pick and shovel, Throw by your spade and pen ; Good-bye to graft and grovel, Good morrow, Gentlemen! (.’reeve Roe,

Thus the Auckland Observer on the reception of the Premier :—"lt was u purely political welcome, chiefly by tho rag tag and bob tail of the party, every man jostling his neighbor in the endeavor to catch Mr Seddoii's eye and vigorously pumphandle him. No wonder Mr Seddon looked a tritle ashamed of it. The reception in the Choral Hall was not one wbit better. 'What one considers the respreseutative men of the town were largely conspicuous by their absence, whi]e the people one scarcely expected to see were there in full force. It was, in a word, a reception by election candidates, their can. vassers and committee men. However, the function passed off well. Mr Seddon was in a happy vein, speaking better than he has spoken in Auckland before, and displaying with effect some of that dramatic art that he has acquired during his lonr Uis declaration that the honors showered" upon him m were . really honors intended for the people ot ; New Zealand was nuite artistic."

No profession of note —be he actor, singer, or conjurer—passes through Constantinople without an invitation to appear before the Sultan. He always pays for these performances in Bank of England notes.

The Japanese eat more lish than any other people in tho world. With them meat eating is a foreign innovation, coniined to the rich, or rather to those rich people who prefer it to the national diet. A traveller through Servia will often notice dolls hung up inside cottage win* dows. He learns that the dolls are put up as a sign to announce to wayfarers that a marriageable daughter dwells in the house.