HUMOUR .. More or Less

Gisborne Herald, Volume LXVI, Issue 20086, 4 November 1939, Page 13

HUMOUR .. More or Less

“Let Ma Do It” The little boy was evidently a firm believer in the old adage, “Of two evils choose the lesser.” Turning the corner at full speed, he collided with the minister. “Where are you running to, my little man?" asked the minister.

“Home!” panted the boy, “Ma's going to spank me.” “What!” gasped the astonished minister. “Are you so eager to have your mother spank you that you run home?” “No,” shouted the boy over his shoulder as he resumed his homeward flight, “but if 1 don’t get there before Pa, he’lL do it!”

‘A young theologian named Fiddle, ‘Refused to accept his degree: ‘For.’ said he, ‘ ’tis enough to be Fiddle, Without being Fiddle, D.D.' ”

“Professor: ‘And just why wouldn’t you want to have your name inscribed in the 3-lall of Fame?’ “.Student: ‘Well, I'd sooner have people asking why it isn’t there than why it is.’ ”

There was once, a boy who infuriated his father by constantly flinging quotations from great authors at his head whenever there was an argument between them. One day the father in a fit of exasperation said to him: “Don’t quote. Emerson says that quotation is the sign of a weak mind.” “Then,” retorted the son, “why do you quote Emerson?” * —Brother John, in the Inquirer. Thanks Bill (referring to dogs): “Yus, mine’s a Scotch terrier. What’s your’s, Jarge?” •largo: “Thank Ye —jist another pint." All Alike “I’m sure you’ll like Charles, father,” said the love-sick girl; "He’s a fine vounn man.” “Has he any money?” “Oh, dad —you men are all alike —so inquisitive. That’s exactly what Charles asked me about you.”