Tit Bits

Feilding Star, Volume VII, Issue 111, 27 February 1886, Page 3

Tit Bits

Hqw to scrape an acquaintance ? — Tun)J:b?Tbie:r. TJo@*e M a difference in engagements, for in "a naval engagement the fighting takes place at once, but in matrimony the fighting occurs some time after the engagement. '/■What comes after T?" asked a teacher of a pupil who was learning the alphabet. He received the bewildering reply — " You do — to see 'iizal" " What makes the milk so warm ?" the milkman was asked one morning. " PJease mum," ho answered, the pump handle' s broke, and the missus took the water from the boiler." "Whatever one makes oneself ono ©njdys thoroughly. The man who makes trouble between two persons enjoys it more than do the persons themselves. little -..Willie had been summarily corrected by his mother for repeated acts of naughtiness. The punishment being over— "Papa," he sobs, in tones of anguish, ""tow could you many such an ill-tempered woman as mamma?" : - . The old gentleman who changed hia •will explained that he wasn't feeling very well, and he thought that he would, try a change of heir. At a public dinner one man gave his fork to another with the words, '* just stick that fork into that potato for me, will you?" The unneightoorly neighbor did as he requested — and left it sticking there. Notice, at a French watering place : — "In case of ladies in danger of drowning they should be seized by the clothes, and not by the hair, which generally comes off."