The Baby Show

Feilding Star, Volume V, Issue 5, 12 January 1884, Page 2

The Baby Show

Although at first glance, this may appear to the uninitiated a perfectlj innocent and harmless addition to the programme of events to culminate' the\ anniversary fete, jet to a certain class in the community it threaten* to be fraught with danger, viz, to the unfortunate daw oi bachelor*. In the wisdom of the committee it has been decided that two gentlemen, who have never "faced the music "of the marriage ceremony, shall be appointed baby judges. Of the com« mittee, we can only say .•/ the trail of the serpent in over them tU^TJiey ap# Benedicts to a man and know the dangers to be met in deciding on the several merits of Exhibited JuTenityyl A dv. earning public will not be deceived with specious pretences and false reasonings^* They know W absurd it' w'ioixpeet a?^ bachelor to know ; anything 'whatever about babies, when thousands 3 of instances o< cur daily when thii wretched class of men betray the grossest igoeranoe of .the sex of babies, and it ir only by artfully roiled questions, put to the mother or the holder, can they make the discorery. Then as to the comparative beauties of babies; to the ignorant mind of a bachelor they are all alike, yet with the natural Mxenessbt mancmd, he will stutter out to a fond mother the vapid remark that ier offspring is the " pearl beyond price." He does'nt do this from a desire to please, on the contrary, it is sheer terror that overcomes him. Admitting the child may bo all the mother thinks it, jet the terror stricken mortal is a* ignorant as the> child itself of its beauties. He fears an irresistible attack, and shuns the danger.! ilt may appear a simple thing to tell the fattest child -so it wonldbeif he could tell its age by looking at its teeth like he would a sheep^-orif ht could settle the question by pounds and ounces, but the artfnineM of women would circumvent him here, Sappostv baby No 1 weighed twenty-two pounds) four ounces; a few minutes attention to th» feeder would raise the weight of If© % and put it. orer Wo 1, which would bo 1 unfair handicapping; This c is presuming: the babies exhibited for plumpness wero - all the same age ; and it mujif aot be forgotten thataW babies appear the samo '. age to a bachelor beeausV they all ' happen to barei the samejnanpers and 1 customs. The smallest baty— how is he to know whether a mptheftakes^ pride in the smallness of , her chjoiP . and how ia he to a tear clear of "the shoals and quicksands" that, JbfSßt^hjp. The ' smaller the woman the grfa|#j v/ the danger. He simply "had bettor tto) M Them ■ last but not least, .how can baohelors foil ' ■ whether a baby , is . well dressed P It is » ■ moral and physical impo«sib|lity —and t cannot be done. ': -„,!,.„„■