“FORBIDDEN FRUIT”

Evening Star, Issue 24286, 29 August 1942, Page 3

“FORBIDDEN FRUIT”

[Written by “ X.Y.” for the ‘ Evening . Star.’]

A fruiterer in Christchurch was fined £2 for selling pears under 2sin in diameter.—P.A. telegram.

Last week I got A lot Of little pears, quite good and sound— A tidy number to the pound. Then we—(To wit, my family And I) devoured these pears until We’d obviously had our till.

Ah, well-a-way! To-day I found that the unhappy Wight Whose ipears I’d purchased with delight Was brought To some Gilbertian court, And fined for selling pears that were Deficient in diameter.

Now, tell me, why Should I Become a sort of partner in A quite imaginary sin? ' Why should A pear that’s small but good, And he who sold the thing, likewise, Be damned upon a point of size ? And, tell me, where That pear Will be despatched, consigned, or doomed, If not thus purchased an.l consumed? Is it . Teetotally unfit For human food, but only big Enough to feed some famished pig?

Now why consign To swine— ; And why abstract from human use These fruit both sweet and full of juice? " Because The framers of our laws Appear to think that man can’t thrive On pip-fruit under two-point-five. One tree I own. Alone; A monstrous tree of sugar-pears (Those little, early, green affairs), And all Its fruit are very small. Well, very few of them are more Than two-point-three, or two-point-I four.

When ripe enough I’ll stuff A paper bag with these, and eat Them shamelessly in Princes street— Till swarms Of chaps in uniforms Come round me, full of eagerness, To take my fruiterer’s address. And then I’ll say: “ Good day— Will you accept a pear or two? I’m sure they will not poison you.” Then each Will lose his power of speech, Grin like a dog, and go about Tho town, to smell more culprits out.