LUNCHING WELL

Evening Star, Issue 19788, 11 February 1928, Page 10

LUNCHING WELL

IRISH HUMORIST'S ADViOF. AN AMUSING ADDRESS. An amusing address on ‘'.Hip Duty nf Lunching Well’ was made by _Mi “ Jyvnn Doyle,” tho Irish playwright, •ind" hmnonst, to tho members_ of the Ahuu-hester Luncheon Club. From it ire select the following passage:---Luneliors of Mam Lester, linger ever ycur meals. Haste is the , enemy ci good eating. ARoy things tempt us to it. Business with. one. Tie -gobhl’s down his food to get back to Ins oliice. J.ove tempts another. He wo Is down his meal because some _icmale, equally ill-nourished, is uniting loi him at the corner. In this very room tho tragedy occurs. Health is the first thing, says Swift, money the second, and the third is drinking coffee. How pinny members of this dub have hurriedly gulped down that precious liquid with the tears sticaminn- from their eves in order that, Cod Wive them, they might listen to say, “ unprintable things about India ” ? ... Fating is an art. nut it is alim an insurance, and tho insurance against tho flatness and tedium of old ago. Time devours all things; but bis appetite changes as ho grows older. When we are voting sport occupies us; then sox is added; but in the end both subside, and *f the physical pleasures there is little left us but our meals. AYhat’s to become of us, then, if we haven’t learned to eat? But, remember, you must practise "■astronomy in time, H you haven t foamed to eat before fifty you had better die in your sins. The man who takes to studying vintages in his old is a danger to his friends. . . ■ The old belated amateur in food and drink will impale yon on the long agony of a public bouse port, and you II die bowling. . , Not, mind von, that there isn t something to be said for indigestion. Handled scientifically it might have its uses, even in tho Manchester Lx-cliam’-c. ’ Tn a variable market a man mi-dh convert himself from a “hull into a “hoar” merely by eating a lobster mayonnaise. . . . Many a young fellow has gamed sufficient courage from a lodging liou.se steak to commit matrimony—and so make his temporary dyspepsia permanent. And here I take up my song against women. Like us men they discover . |ho valuable things of hie, too late. Our chemists’ shops arc at this mojuent thronged with wives running round in search of the powder they should have bought years ago. AA b y do they not abandon the vain pursuit of beauty, and, while there is yet. time, buy cookery books? . . . Tor a woman to lire successfully with n husband after thirty-five she must be something of a chef. Tho human rare would cease it we didn’t eat and multiply; and now that married women arc giving up arithmetic they might at to cooking. It annoys mo when I think how little advantage women have taken of their improved standing in the twentieth century. A new era has arrived for them now that they arc relying on their legs instead of on their faces. There arc ten times as many happy women now as there were in 1!)00. B u t ... a victory won with the legs is an affair of the morning. If it’is not consolidated with spade work It won’t endure in the afternoon. Why don’t women learn to make food interesting to their- men at tho time when men’s tastes turn naturally to food? If they did they would rule marriage from ring to tombstone. The distressed widower would remember poignantly not only the first kiss of courtship, hut the last omelette of matrimony.