THE ‘DANBURY NEWSMAN’ IN THE HIGHLANDS.

Evening Star, Issue 3848, 24 June 1875, Page 3

THE ‘DANBURY NEWSMAN’ IN THE HIGHLANDS.

The American, humorist, Mr Bailey, of the ‘Danbury News,” has contributed to his papei his impressions of the Highlands, written in his own peculiar style. He travelled north by way of Glasgow and the Caledonian Canal. Glasgow he calls the dirtiest city he has ever seen. “We reached Glasgow at 4 p.m., but commenced to smell it at a quarter to three. Glasgow thinks it wants a new harbor, but what it really needs is some chloiide of lime. But, after all, were it not for chemical compounding and the Clyde, Glasgow -would be a handsome city.” Glencoe had been described to him as grand, savage, mysterious, and oppressive. “To find the sombre and gloomy points of the glen one must be excessively biiious. It won’t do to seek the oppressive in Glencoe while carrying an active liver in your anatomy. You may take my word for that,” At Banavie Hotel he ate a beefsteak supper, and about 2 a.m. stepped out of bed at the rate of about a mile aud a-half to the minute, and rung for aeidlitz. The boots brought it, but there was nothing to stir it with. “ I said I would look in my clothes for a pencil, but he said he could manage it well enough, and immediately drew forth a venerable pocket comb, and proceeded to agitate the powder with it in a prompt but yet graceful manner, and then passed the glass to me. I thanked him for the infinitude of his resources, but I told him I would Jet the powder settle before I drank it, as the sediment disturbed my stomach.” At Fort Augustus he tried some Scotch oatmeal cakes and milk. “ Oatmeal,” he tells us, “ was the staple article of food in the early wars of this people, and after taking a bit one ceases to wonder at the reckless bravery they displayed.” He ate about two square inches of a thin cake, and was immediately seized with a ferocious desire to stab somebody. “In fact, I tried to inveigle the boatswain to the back of the pilot-house with a sincere determination to cut him open, and had he not been otherwise engaged he would to-day be gathered with his fathers and other relatives. I have not touched the cake since.” The humor of most of this is rather far-fetched, but we may forgive our visitor on account of his genuine admiration of Foyers. “ When scenery lets a man’s cigar out, it is scenery worth visiting. The Niagara Falls and I are natives of the same country. I steadily clung to this fact all the way up and over the hill, and I was fully prepared to laugh at this contemptuous attempt of the Scotch to get up a fall. But Iclid not laugh. I stood on a jutting point of rock about half-way from the chaldron to the top of the falls, and X had the whole immediately in front of me, and so grand a spectacle I never before witnessed.”