POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXVIII, Issue 3, 4 July 1939, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PEKCY ftMs

Another setback to the New Deal suggests that riJosev.-- :>_nn- t - <.;-ing his cards shrewdly. Last night's mat med'ey sounded t» us like a necking party. * ' * '•'.'' It is when the Trentham track is cut up that punters get that way, too. a -_• *. Once more a no-conn"dence trick J*JI to be tried on the Government. Another' prestidigitator at work. <f-. « ' . * ' Headline: BANKRUPTCY RETURNS. Well, hasn't prosperity taken it* hook? Upson Downes QTlyffe. «- May Heaven preserve u§ frem tho§e who mistake " a fervid . imagination lor "vision." This applieg to P.M.s and others. * • '«■■■■*.' STHATEG¥ ANS SKILL, Dear Flage,--The Prime Minister ttb9 Rt, Hon- M- J, Savage) describes himself as a stmtegist, because strategy is based on common sense, But as he himself implies, whether the strategy of the layman is equal to the strategy and tactics of the skilled man, "that is a mattep of opimon-'' Something more than strategy is needed to free the world from its present mentally unfit st&te. Yours truly, QUQ YADJS, * '• # BRAJN-TE4§ER§. To begin with: T,P-W, (Hataitai) a.hguid have been included in the list of Saturday night's soiverp, By mail yesterday, solutions pf fcQtji problems from "Ren," "Vera1" (Highland Park), "Bet" (.Peton.G), '•Oliviah,*' M,S.C. (88.-points in three mmytes in the "Sports Post" intelligence test was tophole), <How-;at/' 'Samny" iwe shall deal with that' matter presently), "Uncle Cecil" (her§'§ wishing ycivi happy dentures), T-K.P, (Mount Victoria), -pet One," ''Prof, ot Maths," g.j, (Karori), and "Tiny," Nelson-C.B-W. ta stall man) had Nq, X solved at 3.30 Saturday afternoon, and *'Joyst" has qeme to light with Nq- 3,

INFORMATION DEPARTMENT.

Dear gir,—Would you please answer through your columns the following query:—

In its rules dealing with racing it is laid down by a certain homing pigeon federation "That all races must be decided on velocity proper, i.e., time into distance." A special prize is awarded to the member whose birds »ut up the best average velocity from three race points of varying distances. How would you compute the best average velocity—:<a) by adding the three velocities together and dividing the total by three, or <h) by adding the three velocities together and dividing same into the total of the three distances flown? Which method do you consider will give the average velocity, and why? Thanking you in anticipation, Yours, etc., WAGERThough knowing nothing about pigeon racing, we favour adding the three velocities together and dividing the total by three to get the average speed, because that is the method adopted in other speed contests. However, as some homing pigeon bodies work out the average velocity differently it would be interesting to know why they do so. Wo shall mako room for any such explanation. *■ «. # SHEER NONSENSE. Halibut Hook was a man gregarious, Hia ways of living ware many and various, Though none could bo qustly called nefarious • . • And wee he hilarious! He* sailed one midnight irom Sal** raanca Without a ref. from his Bolshie banker In a fair four-master ycleped a tanker, And shot the anchor. He claims to have lived in a swell adobe, Out on the desert !,Goo' By" or Gobi, With that vaudevillain (a bas!), George Robey— Which is as it moybe."' His nose is blue, though his cheeks are ruddy, And mostly he's garbed in a nut-brown study, And when peeved he would rather say "Dash it!" than Than (You're telling us, Buddy.) He has never found in his pants a weta, ' . Nor was he flat out m the 'quake at Quetta, Nor frossen to death on the suave Hochstetter"""-*" Which is true to the letter, P.S.— We forgot to mention that Hai is bandy And loves goat's milk (as, of course, does Gandhi), And revels—provided a pub is handy— bn poached eggs and "brandy. OURSELVES. *We feel there's something wrong here. * *. "*:."*:..'■ INFORMATION, L. (Woodville);—Neat, but the gentleman whose name is played upon might be lacking in a sense of humourTry again. j,B, (Hataitai), — Your belated rhymes: "Misty mushrooms in mid-winter!" What a poet Percy is, And he's surely worked a jtchUntfer "Finding hundreds with hif V-Maz.' Bacon rashers crisply curliojß Small brown circles in the pan; Snowy tablecloth unfurling-™ Breakfast for this super.man. "Superman"? Selfish, rather!—(P.F.) ';Bro. Hilarious,"—Glad to have that, teaser, and thanks for your kindly note. P.F, ("The Prodigal Daughter").— Nice work, but it might go to the young lady's head to see it in print. You comprehend? "Jelly Bean "~-You must not put on airs when dealing with Prime Minisrs _at least, not in this column. "Sarge" ("1914") .—Clever and to the point, aa usual, but better let that Sleeping dog lie. A.T. —None "was," not none "were," as the «'none" stands for "not one" or "no one." M.F. (Palmerston North).—Agree with you that that publication could be "a darned sight better than it in." H. Patton (who asks for the wnditions necessary to buy % Rolls -*•>-»»»). —We understand that the conditions have been changed latterly; but you bad better consult one of the - big motor agencies. "Toby."—-No, we have not yet been invited to dine with the Prime Minister, up Northland way, but we are living in hopes, Our health is Al, thank you. "Anti-Fatima,"—We, too, are of the lean kind, M.l.C.—Would have been publishablt ,had there been fewer false rhyme*

WAGER