POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXV, Issue 38, 15 February 1933, Page 8

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLACiB

Pay liter, of a Verity, is no daub. He certainly brushed up England's chances of bagging those Ashes. **• ■ ' ■ " Amos-'u'-Andy" suggests that if the price of a modification of the war debts is a return to the gold standard, negotiations are likely to flag. .-■ * *-,-'* MELTING INFLUENCES. So far, no real trouble has disfig-* ured the'play in the critical and hard- . fought fourth Test. What else would you expect with a Love and a Darling ; on the Aussie side? ' '»'•.»;'■' * , /.HAT IMPERIAL SPIRIT.; At this distance, and remembering . the high hopes generated- at Ottawa, J. it doesn't seem quite fair .that New , Zealand's farmers should be robbed 5 of the benefits of high exchange by-a ; misguided solicitude for the struggling r British dairy producers. [ *''*.' * STILL ABOVE WATER. ' . . ' I Remarks "M. T. Head": That con- - tinued buoyancy of revenue from taxa- > tion (vide: the-Minister of Finance) I should; mollify that sinking-feeling of 1 yours and Sir Francis Bell, and tern. porarily, anyhow, prevent our floating i debt from being torpedoed. ' .'■..' '*.- '■■ ■'•*■'-..:•.-'■■ [/' ■-'..'.- EXCOMMUNICATED./ ! It is unveraciously mis-understood c that the Coalition caucus entered o» its business yesterday singing— s We shall meet but. never miss you, 1 There will be three vacant chairs,"... '■- .-' But we "really can't caress you, c .'Cos you're past all pleas and prayers^ Also, it is stated, Mr; Coates set thei a tune, Mr. Forbes sang seconds, and-a; ' ■f happy time was had by all. - _ '-' . "■"■:* I-.. '*"'■', "" '[*-[ '-'■'" DREAMS, IDLE DREAMS.I Dear Percy,— : j I really must tell you about a curious c dream I had the other night. I dreamed. f that.the Government had:—• ..: Revoked.that extension of one year's office; Wiped out the wheat duties; . Decided to introduce a national Statd lottery to relieve unemployment. and distress;:; ■■■■': '■-.-■;■'..' ■ _ Reduced the Judges'" salaries like! |. other public servants, and made eqiial« . ity of sacrifice something more than a j. parrot,cry; ' v Reduced the, cost of Government by] . reducing the number of members, i- I Was so astounded'that T awoke—to! c find myself in the middle of the nighi :s (mare); of higher exchange and mora ° taxation. . '-- .'. .;-... ..,.' [f .■'■.'■'■'"'' Yours in iearsj '.-. -~ s. '•-'""' , KAMELSBACI_. 3" . -..'..- ..*' ." *:: :-."•■ ,r (PRO) TEST CRICE_ST. '» Flage,. h , -; " -.;'-'. > l. It doesn't seem quite; according toi ; e Cocker that the Englishmen should! c have to play the tropical heat AND a the umpires in the Brisbane Test.-, I c hope that when their turn comes td v bat temperatures will have cooled off.- •' '. By the way, talking of umpires, did c you read of that incident in the-M.C,C. £ v.; Queensland game when Oxehham a was obviously caught" off Larwood but was given not out? The " express,'V,who is'said to be rather temperamental, flung the ball: on the ground and (I read) had" to be persuaded by, his captain to continue to bowl at Oxenhani. He did so—with suchvini that the veteran Queenslahder waai compelled to duek1 several "bump*, ers." What with this incident^ and the! - (reported) public complaint' of -Jar- ' ' dine, Wyatt, and Sutcliffe that th'eyi were wrongly, given but, it looks as though the' next Enjglish; team that visits Australia; will have to include its own umpires in its entourage.' '■•'■ - 8.-XLYHOO. % ■ -'* ' *'' ■ " *--' - - --.--..-! ■ - MORNING TEA MONOLOGUE; ? It jest ain't fair . .- . this salel "■ tax, too. .... What is poor honest, folk to do ' To dodgo it? I'm not one to "squeal, But who could 'aye a roarer ddal ' • Than that?.l arsk you.> Why, there'll 7 -'.-.De,'-. •: ..,.-/ v ; .-. ;' - ■■■ Not very soon, but presently, '• So many hunemployed, alas, / ,-.. . They'll 'aye to feed us all on grass, 1 With p'raps on Sunday- for a-.'treat. . A .few wild oats or so to eat..'"';"-.-"' But serious speakin', you can bet ' } We're hot out of the wood'eap yet, 1 An'only chumps like——;an'- —— ]> Would go hon treatin' us like goats. c If I'd mp way an'wasn't dumb r I'd boot the lot to Kingdom. Come. ;. By gosh I would! Me langwidge faili, _ Labour sits there an' bites hees nails, 5 AnY smilin' to theirselves. Oh well, 7 They're showin's not too credible.: - 8 An' look at 'Arris, Wright-'n'-Veitchj < 3 An' Stallworthy—-they tried to teach t The Govermink-the way to go, r And what they done to them you know. s The game's real crook. I 'opes them, -'."/boys ■■'. ■.--.- Who spiked their guns an'-.made -* noise '■■-• In our be'alf, will get. their doos When, dearie, we shall 'aye to choose The devil or the deep bine sea ' To run this land as it should be, ..'..- An' not go plungin' on the blind Like Forbes-'n*-Co. I've spoke me mind... :, * •":*'- s HERETIC IN THE HIVE. 3 . '.•-."■■■-■.'" 3 By this time it may. be that George" .. B. Shaw —doesn't he look an ordinary, . cit. without" the Bernard?->-is no longer . a 'member of the Co. Wexford Bee. . Keepers' Association, centre of activities, Ennisworthy. ; If so, and he is .' suddenly attacked by rheumatic aches x and pains, George will havo to rely on other apiarial sources for his curativo j; bee stings. At the last meeting of t the Co. W.B.K.A. it was proposed that . . Shaw be removed from' the list of ! members on' the ground that he had- V j made "blasphemous statements." in [ his latest book, "The Adventures of 5 the Black Girl in her Search for God." i These statements were regarded - .by t those present as <" striking at the very ; foundations of, Christianity,'' one memj ber declaring that he, at any rate, did j not wish to be associated with an in- > fidel. G.B.S. became a life member .of the association four years ago, for why,, we are unable to ex- . plain.' Possibly he had an idea of x one day challenging Maeterlinck and < Fabro with an iconoclastic thesis on " : bees, because the virtues of bees, like ( those of ants and the Bulgarian bug - have too long been stupidly over-, i praised. For example, you cannot catch the ant napping because (it is i reported) .'he never sleeps, and bees - aro so darned effeminate that there is - no. record of their ever having anything • but a queen to rule over them. This iby the way. We shall certainly keep ■ a vigilant look out for Shaw's reaction to the stinging indictment of his i brother members. He has had his [ share of honeyed words in his long • day: friends and admirers have seen . to that,