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Dunstan Times, Issue 990, 8 April 1881, Page 3

Here is Sir Arthur Gordon's opinion of Irishmen :—The fine qualities which men of that nation possess, their imperturbable good humor, their light bearledness,their ready wit, give them an advantage in the discharge of the duties of a Constitutional Governor, and ensure them a popularity which those who possess the more reserved manners and undemonstrative habits of the Scotch may not be able to obtain. The South Australian Government has arranged with the Orient Company for a fortnightly mail service at Is an ounce for letters, Isa pound for parcels, and 6d a pound for newspapers. “Job printing!” exclaimed an old woman the other day, as she peeped over her spectacles at the advertising page of a country newspaper. “ Poor Job! They’ve kept him printing, week after week, ever since 1 first learned to read ; and if he wasn’t the most patient man that ever was, he never could have stood it so Ion" ’nohow.” Can a man intoxicated by music be said to be air-tight 1 _ Tire young physician returns from his vacation to find bis patients lively as crickets. He inwardly tows that he will stay at home and attend to business hereafter. Herr Nigstikiki plays a lovely nocturne, which he has just composed. To him, as he softly touches the final note, fair amateur says—“ Oh, thanks; T am so fond of that dear, dear old t me.” An Ohio girl was deserted by her lover at the very foot of the altar. Lucky girl! This is the narrowest escape on record. A Celestial named Ah Fat was charged before one of the Victorian Courts recently with maliciously wounding Ah Tung, a fellow countryman. It appeared that a letter had arrived, addressed to Ah Fat, of which complainant took possession, and,haring opened, read tho contents. On the defendant’s return, he, in consequence, became “ exceeding wroth," it being tho law in China, as alleged, that If one man opens another man’s letters, the wronged one is allowed to stab the offender to the heart. Ah Fat proceeded to enforce the penalty on Ah Tung, but only succeeded in inflicting a nasty wound on complainant's forehead. Which of the reptiles is a mathema ’ tioian ? Tho adder. What is the difference between a fixed star and a meteor?— One is a sun, the other is a darter. It is a difficult thing for a dog without a tail to show his master how m«oh he thinks of him.