MISCELLANEOUS

Dunstan Times, Issue 774, 16 February 1877, Page 3

MISCELLANEOUS

A carping author complains that too much is said about the tongue. But how is it to be helped, when the thing is always in everybody’s mouth ? What is the difference between the top of a monument and a song for one voice ? One’s so high and the other’s solo. ■ Eggsactly so. —Customer; “Them eggs in the window good?”—Trader; “Don’t know, ain’t been inside 'em.”—Customer : Ab, thought you didn’t look like a chicken. Good bye.” An Illinois paper says that a flash of lightning lately entered a school-room in that State, and tore a pair of boots from a boy’s feet, and hurled them at the head ot the master, to the great delight of the unterrified juveniles. A man who cannot mind his own business is not fit to bo trusted with another’s. A man being once asked why he talked to himself, candidly answered “ Because 1 like to converse with a man of sense.” Some people are never contented. After having all their limbs broken, their heads smashed, and their brains knocked out, they will actually go to law, and try to get further damages. Why don’t you wheel that barrow of coals, Ned ? said a miner to one of his sons : ‘ it is not a very hard job, there is an inclined plane to relieve you.’—‘Ab,’ said Ned, ‘ the piano may be inclined, but bang me if I am.. An Irish journal has this gein in answer to a correspondent ‘Wp decline to acknowledge the receipt of your post-ca>-d ’ which is much like the Corkonian who travelled into Kerry to an insulting enemy to ‘ tell him to his face that lie would thrato him with silent contempt,” A New Jersey editor actually had his pocket, picked of 100 dollars in cash, in this city, last month. Evidently New Jersry is the proper place to start anewspaper. T1 o idea of an editor having 100 dollars, in ready money, all at one time ! Why, it almost passes belief ! Buts, as it were, a heavy internal revenue tax on good naturod and well-posted credulity. Philadelphia Printers Circular.