MISCELLANEOUS.

Dunstan Times, Issue 728, 31 March 1876, Page 3

MISCELLANEOUS.

Talk about men losing their senses when they are drunk ; it is not always the case, for some men aro all tho sharper when they are about so full. A man by the name of Ifanafrau, in Detroit, lately applied to the station house in that city to bo locked up. The sergeant appeared a trifle surprised at the request, and proceeded to interview him on tho subject. “ It’s all right, old man, 1 know my biz. When I’m drunk the old woman can handle me like a child, but I can whollop blazes out of her when I’m sober. Lock me up, for I’m on it ter night, an’ the old woman is waiting for mo to come homo. Turn on tho bolts, old mam” They were turned on. The inventors of matches—Adam and Eve. The moatj likely to become a woman—a little girl. Mrs Davy, of Tennessee, pretended to be drowned just to see what her husband would do. He hired a cheap negro to drag for her body, and went to the cornfield at his usual pace. And then she crawled out from under the house, followed on and blessed him her hardest. New York young ladies lace tight to show economical young fellows how little waste they can get along with for a husband. Also, on their own account, how much squeezing they can stand. The Forbes Times (New South Wales), reports a circumstance of a most painful character that occurred at Goolagong recently. A youthful mother, only married 12 months ago, had left her first and only little one in bed whilst she went to fetch a bucket of water, in the absence of her husband, who was away reaping. As she neared the house on her return she heard her child crying, and dropping the bucket, ran to where she had left her babe. On entering she was horrified at seeing a large snake on the bed, and almost bereft of her senses, she ran out to give the alarm. Some members of a picnic party not far distant noticed the poor woman run and fall, and run and fall again. As this was repeated several times they at once hastened to her, and she then almost hysterically told the cause of her fear. A farmer named O’Donnell rushed to the house, and there he saw the baby with the deadly fangs of the snake fastened on to it. He picked up the child and held it high over head, shaking it violently, but still the reptile would not let go its hold, and it was'only after the snake was killed that’it could be taken off. The father was at once sent for, and although he hastened home as quickly as possible, it was only to find his little one a corpse, and his wife in an agony of grief. The snake was over jC feet in length, and was of a leaden color. An Indian saloon keeper made a bad mistake when he advertised “unapproachable Baltimore oysteis.” Why are the Railways like Tailors?— Because they have such an immense number of cuttings.