Page 4 Advertisements Column 1

Dunstan Times, Issue 700, 17 September 1875, Page 4

Straightforward.— A Californian’s matrimonial advertisement winds up as follows :—“ Fortune no object, but rhould require the gal’s relations to deposit L3OO with me as security for her good behavior. An Irish schoolmaster recently informed his pupils that the feminine gender should be applied to all ships and vessels except mail steamers and men-of-war. A New York dealer in hair-oil, who sold on the principle of “ no cure, no pay,” has sued one of his hald-headed customers, and the latter demands a bald-headed jury, in order that he may be tried by his peers. English and Scotch.—A Scotch drover returning homewards after a somewhat unsuccessful journey, and not in very good humor with the English, when passing through Carlisle, saw a notice stuck up offering a re ward of LSO foi anyone who would do a piece of service to the community by officiating as executioner of the’law on a noted criminal then under sentence of death. Seeing a chance to uiaho up for his bad market, and comfited with the assurance that ho was unknown there, he undertook the office, hanged the rogue, and got the fee. When moving off with the money, ho was twitted as a mean beggarly bcot, doing for money what no Englishman would ; he rephod with a grin, and quiet glee, “ I’ll hang ye a’ at the jprice."