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Dunstan Times, Issue 654, 30 October 1874, Page 3

A conning Engineer.—“ Letting off sleep,” is a little boy’s definition of snoring. Baltimore is boiling down her superfluous canine population into glue, by which the city gains five cents, per dog. Very Hard Lines.—Well, Kirsty, how’s business ?—Middlin’, mem. jist middlin’. Some days we dae naethin ava, an’ itbers we dae twice as muckle.”

Exclusively a printer’s joke Why is a compositor continually “setting ” out of an empty case like an actor ? Because he is always on the “ boards. ” The deepest mine in Cornwall is said to beDolcoath, now about 3GO fathoms, rr 720 yards from the surface. One man has been working in the mine for forty years. During all that time he has lived five miics from the mine. So that he has walked t- n n ites a day in addition to his labor ; an I a calculation which has thus been made shows that this man has during his forty years walked 120,000 miles, which is equal to five times round the world, and half the distance to the moon.

Of the Salmon trout ova taken from Hobart Town to Auckland by Captain Macarthur, of the barque Bella Mary, only one per cent was lost. Eight hundred reached port, in a condition to he at once turned in'o the streams. They have since been distributed over the Province.

The state of Fiji finances may be assumed from the fact that in a Levuka Court recently when the harbor-mas or prosecuted in a case for sailing without a |ceuse, upon being pressed to state his feason for having initiated the proceeding, Captain Hedstrom candidly stated that his instructions were to “ sue the beggars j every one of them. We want our screws.”

A miserly settler at Hamilton (Waikato), whose wife was on her death-bed, refused to pay the travelling expenses of his son, whom the dying mother wished to see. After the woman died he bought a packing case, 1 nailed a bit of black cloth on it, on which he chalked her name, and thus she was buried. —Giey JUver Argus.

Holloway’s Ointment and Pills.—Bad Leg-!.—Any unnatural discharge from the skin is at all times disagreeable, but in hot weather it becomes irritating—sometimes offensive. legs, old scrofula, and scorbutic.eruptions are cooled, soothed and cured by Holloway’s Ointment. It at once arrests all diseases of the surface by purifying and regulating the circulation in their neighborhood, by giving energy to the nerves of the affected part, and by expelling all poisonous and noxious matters. It ejects the seeds of all virulent eruptions and ulcerations, and thus confers no partial or temporary boon, but a complete and permanent cure. By means of these reme-, dies all sufferers may aim at attaining health and will invariably succeed.