MISCELLANEOUS.

Dunstan Times, Issue 578, 16 May 1873, Page 3

MISCELLANEOUS.

The Nelson Colonist says: “A veiy interesting paper was read at a meeting of the Philosophical Society, recently held in Christchurch, the subject of which w r as ‘The des’-ability of dedicating to the people of New Zealand small areas of land assimilating in character to the village greens of England.’ This paper, the author of which is Mr. F. E, Wright, sufficiently exhibits (says a contemporaiy) what they are doing in Canterbury, and we quote tho resolution which was come to on the sub ject; ‘ That, a deputation be appointed to wait upon the Provincial Government, and upon them the desirability of taking steps to provide in every new township for a certain plot of land to be set apart for a Ullage gi-fen, so par as practicable,’ The example thus set in Canterbury in connexion with a small but sti'l important social question is surely worthy of imitation in Nelson and Westland.”

The ingenuity displayed by some people in living upon the credulity of others receives frequent frustration. Here is an instance—A dangerous class of wemen are just now plying their trade in the suburbs of Melbourne. One of the harridans will knock at the door and ask, “if the missis is in,” and if (he servant replies negatively, she says, “ Let me tell yon your ‘fortin, my dear, and you can give me any little thing you like.” The “ little thing ” sometimes takes the form of an article of female attire, which mysteriously disappears and is heard of no more, Betsy of course being innocent of tie larceny.

Two venerable male specimens of the goat tribe met on the ranges at the head of Long Gully, and “ went for one another, a terrible encounter ensuing. Wlr'le some serious “ butt practice” was going on, the animals got near the edge of a deserted quartz shaft, and during one of the charges disappeared power the gjlf. A resident in the neighborhood saw the occurrence, but not being a lover of the goat species took no further heed. On Saturday last, however, he thought of the matter, andcuriosity combined with humane motives, decided him to go and see Low the be"'gerent “ bi"ies” had fared. Accordingly he went to the shaft with two friends, and a stout rope, and on descending the hole he found the champions at the bottom alive and uninjured. With some difficulty they were once more restored to terra. Jirma, but when there, singular to state, they resumed the combat as furiously as ever, and would doubtless have finally settled the question “ which was the better goat of the two” had they been allowed so to do —Bendigo Advertss'r.

The follow ,’ng appears in a home paper:— “Amongthe entries for the late grand meeting at Cairo, Eg,y pt, which took place on January 16 and 17, were two English racehorses, Country .nan and Faliero. They were sent out by Sir George Clretwynd, in charge of an English trainer and jockey, and arrived safely at Cawo. Both horses did well "t the’r work, and were so highly thought of by the foreigners that •an offer of 2,2u001. was made for the pair by an ambitious Egyptian, desirous of winning the Khedive’s grand prize, but the offer was declined. On the first day Faliero won a hurdle race, but Countryman was reserved for the Grand Prix on the following day. When his trainer returned from the races, however, he found Countryman lying down in his box, covered with lather, and foaming at the mouth and nostrils, and his jaws firmly set. A veterinary surgeon was called in, and he at once pronounced the horse to be poisoned. His throat had swol'en to four times its natural size, and it was or l y by the administration of emetics and the application of strong blisters, that the horse’s life was saved. Of course Country man was unable to run at the meeting, and was at once sent back to England. No clue could he found to the perpetrator of this cowardly act, although every effort was made to discover him. Such affairs as this, fortunately, are few- and far between, for they tend to lower the status of the turf. But, in any case, it will probably be some time before anyone will incur the risk and expense of of sending horses to a country where such practices obtain.

■ What effect do flour mills have upon a town? Make it tiour-ieh. There is time for all things. The time to leave is when a young lady asks you “What sort of a dayit is for walking?” A gentleman meeting a friend who was wasting away for consumption, exclaimed, “Ah, my dear fellow, how slow you walk!”— “ Yes," replied tho consumptive, I walk slow, but I’m going fast.” A certain city was about to he destroyed. The women were allowed to leave, and were told that they might carry away on their backs whatever they most prized. Each woman took a man. An Indiana orator, in a late poetical discussion, said : “My opponent has roamed with'Eomulus, ripped with Euripedes, and rocked with Soc,'at p s, but what does he know of the laws cf Indiana ?” A tailor was once asked by a friend what sort of company he had met at the house of an aristocratic customer. He replied that it wasj,.“ rather/mixed whereupon his friend remarked, “ You didn’t expect to meet alljtailors, did you ?” Two ladies in New York were talking about and tbeir usefulness in ridding the city of the cancer worms, which used to be such a nuisance. One sa : d that the chirp ng of the sparrows: early _in the morning when she wanted to sleep, was as great an evil as the worms ; the other disagreed. Just then a gentleman came in, and was appealed to : “Mr. A., which do you think the worst—sparrows or worms?” He immediately answered, “ I never had sparrows.” We take tho following from the Grey Elver Argus: —“ A gentleman who had to appear as witness on a’ horse-stealing case during the last Session’ of the Supreme Court, at Christchurch, and who had—to put it mildly— taken a nip or two before appearing in Court, was requested to give the color of a certain horse. His reply was “ a grey Britan flea.” This occasioned a aconsiderable amount of crossquestioning. Tho witness, however, stuck to his ‘grey Briten flea.’ Fortunately for the ends of justice there happened to be a sporting man upon the jury, who at last ermo to the conclusion that the bibulous witness means to indicate that the horse in question was a “flea-bitten grey.” Sir Nicholas Bacon being once (in tho capacity of Judge) on the point of passing sentence upon a fellow just found guilty of stealing, the culprit greatly importuned him to save his life, and among other things, alleged he had the honor of being one of his lordship’s relations. “ How do yon prove that ?” said Sir Nicholas. “My lord,” replied the man, “your name is Bacon, and my name is Hog, and hog and bacon have in all ages been reckoned akin.” “ That is true,” answered the judge, “but hog is never bacon until it has been hung, and therefore, until you are hung, you can be no relation of mine.”