HE KNEW THE VALUE OF ADVERTISING.

Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 4131, 18 October 1884, Page 6 (Supplement)

HE KNEW THE VALUE OF ADVERTISING.

When the defendant took tho stand His Honor said :

' Prisoner you are charged with having removed the goblet from tho hand of the Cogswell statue and substituting a pair of two-bit suspenders, with a placard calling attention to your establishment across the way.' 'Well, Sluige,' replied the offender, with, an ingratiating smile, 'of gorse I vants to get along in pecsness.' ' After which,' continued the Court, sternly, 'you substituted a lot of neckties for the suspenders, and attached to the other hand a lot of bills referring to your new stock of gum shoes and hair oil.' ' Does hair oil is fust-rale, your honor,' said the defendant, ' I vould like to sell you a pottle.' ' And yesterday,' continued the Court, consulting the indictment,' you obstructed the thoroughfare and created a disturbance by placing a paper-collar and a plug hat on the statue in question.' ' Dose blug hats is cheap at 4dol, Shugc. Moses Lev-v cliai-ges fife and a halef for dein same kind,' returned the trader, cheerfully ; ' I bents dose fellurs cfei-y dimes.' 'And at night,' *went on His Honor, 'at night it appears you placed in the figure's hand a transparency containing a further advertisement of your wares. Now, this is most improper and reprehensible.' ' Dot's right, Shuge,' said Mr Solomons, delighted. 'Bitch into me, off you blesse. Sphcak loudt, so dos noosbaper vellers can hear you,' and he smiled benignantly upon the reporters. ' Great heavens !' thundered the Court, as a frightful idea struck him. ' Is it possible you have the mendacity to use the machinery of this Court as an advertising dodge ?' ' Dot's it, dot's it, Shudge,' exclaimed the Cheap John, rubbing his hands exultantly. 'I sworo oud der gomplaint myself.—ban Francisco Post.