THE BAD BOY.

Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 3740, 11 July 1883, Page 4

THE BAD BOY.

HIS JIA RECEIVES DELEGATES

"Well, how's your ever" said the grocery man to the bad boy, a- lie blew in with tho wind on tlic day of the cyclone, and loft tho door open. "Say, shut that, door. You waul to blow everything out of tho store. Had any more tights, protecting girls from dudes '(" '•No, everything is quiet so far. But this Christian Association has caused a coldness between pa and ma though." "How's that? Your pa isn't jealous,

isheP" and the grocery man came around from behind the counter to get the latest gossip to retail to the hired girls who traded Avith him. "Jealous nothin'," said the boy, as he took a few raisins out of a box. '' You sec, tho delegates were shuffled out to all the church members to take caro of, and they dealt two to ma, and she never told pa anything about it. They came to supper the first night, and pa didn't get home, so Avhen they went to the convention in the evening ma gave them a night key, and pa came home from the boxing match about eleven o'clock, and ma was asleep. Just as pa got most of his clothes oft, he heard somebody fumbling at the front door, and he thought" ifc Avas "burglars. Pa has got nerve enough Avhen he is on the inside and the burglars are on the outside. He opened a window and looked out, aud saw t\vo suspicious looking characters trying to pick the lock with a skeleton key, and ho picked up a new slop-jar that ma bought Ayhcn avc moved, cover and all, and dropped it down right between the two delegates. Gosh, if it hacl hit one of them there Avould have been the solemnest funeral you ever shay. Just as it struck they got the door opened and came in tho hall, and the wind Avas blowing pretty hard, and they thought a cyclone had taken a cupola off the house. They Avere talking about being miraculously saved, and trying to scratch a match on their wet pants, when pa Avent to the head of tho stairs and pushed over a wire stand filled with potted plants, Avhich struck pretty near the delegates, and one of them said the house Avas coming down sure, and they better go into the cellar, and they Avent doAvn and got behind tho furnace. Pa called me up, aiid Avantcdmeto go clown cellar and tell the burglars avc Avere unto them, and for them to get out, but lAvasn't well, so pa locked his door and went to bed. I guess it must have been half an hour before pa's cold feet Avoke ma up, and then pa told her not to move for her life, 'cause there were two of the savagest looking burglars that ever Avas, rummaging over tho house. Ma smcllcd pa's breath to sec if he had got to drinking again, and then she got up and hid her oraidc Avatch in her shoes, and _ her Onakuka diamond earrings in the Bible, Avhere she said no burglar would ever find them, and pa and ma laid awake till daylight, and then pa said he Avasn't afraid, and he and ma went down cellar. Pa stood on the bottom stair and looked around, and one of the delegates said : "Mister is the storm over, and is your family safe," and ma recognized tho voice and said: " AVhy, it's one of the delegates. AVhat nvc you doing doAvn there ': " and pa said: "AVhat's a delegate," and then ma explained it. and pa apologized, and the delegates said it Avas no matter, as they had enjoyed themselves real well in tho ecliar. Ma was mortified most to death, but tho delegates told her it was all right, She Avas mad at pa first, but Avhen she saw- the broken slop Ijoavl on the front steps, and tho potted plants in the hail, she Avanted to kill pa, and I guess she Avould, only for the society of the delegates. She couldn't help telling-pa he wasa bald-headed old fool, but pa didn't retaliate. He is too much of a gentleman to talk back in company. All he said Avas that a Avoinan avlio is old enough to have delegates sawed off on to her ought to have sense enough to tell her husband, and then they all drifted off into conversation about the convention and the boxing match, and everything Avas all right on the surface, but after breakfast, when the delegates Avent to the convention, I noticed that pa Avcnt right down town and bought a iicav slop-jar and some more plants. Pa and ma didn't speak all the forenoon, and I guess they Avould not up to this time, only ma's bonnet come home from the milliners, and she had to havo some money to pay for it. Then she called pa ' pet,' and that settled it. " AVhen ma calls pa ' pot,' that is twenty-five dollars. 'Dear old darling' means fifty dollars. But say, those Christian young men clo a heap of good don't they? Their presence seems to make people better. Some boys down by the store Avere going to tie a can on a dog's tail yesterday, and somebody said, "here comes the Christian Association," and those bad boys let. the dog go. They tried to find the dog after tho crowd had got by, but the dog knew his business. I niust go down and charge the sodafountain for a picnic that is expected from the country."—Pecks Sun.