SOCIAL MUTES.

Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 3629, 28 February 1883, Page 4

SOCIAL MUTES.

Of course the word mutes is not to be taken literally. Social mutes are not fitting , candidates for admission to a deaf and dumb asylum, but simply the mutes of society-—the people avlio have nothing to say. We meet them everywhere, and it is a mistake to think that they are ahvays people without ideas. They are sometimes shy people, often people who on occasion can talk with the best, and do not care to trouble themselves to entertain any one unless they wish to do so ; but usually they are people avlio simply do not kuoAv how to begin a conversation with a stranger, and wait for the stranger to take the initiative. Two of this sort together have a sorry time of it, as I know very well indeed. I cmy people -who have the gift of small talk, who not only always think of something to say to strangers, but who do not need an answer. But, for my part, I can lieA'cr talk unless I feel assured that I am not boring niA* audience, and to those who have nothing to say I cannot long find anything- to utter. Silence falls betAveen us, after I have lugged in the weather by the ears as often as I dare, and all is over. Yet I confidently believe that I am not a hopelessly stupid person, and that the other party to the silence may be really worth knoAvmg, if one coidd only find out how. It is this oft repeated dilemma that hasset me to thinking whether people might not do something for themselves under such afflicting circumstances. Imu not sure but that " How to Keep up a Conversation " might make a very useful volume. I should like some one else to Avrite it and let me study it; but there is. oue- rule lvliich would holp'peoplo aloug , - considerably, and that is to rcmcmbfcr- that when once the ball of conversation is throAA'ii to them they can easily keep it up. If one is forced to do all the throwing , , to ask questions and make remarks, receiving "Yes," "No," "Ah," and " Indeed," for replies, it Avill need the talent of an orator and the good temper of a saint to g-o on. and prosper. But if one's fellow-victim really makes a remark ono has a chance. Do not answer merely by dissent or assent, or by saying something which ends the subject. Add to ymir j '' Yes,'' your ' ; No,'' your '' I have,'' or " I have not," something which, shall bring another remark. In this case, if the person wishes to converse at all, conversation becomes possible. To those AA - ho, just beginning life, feel their danger of sinking into the position ofr social unites, I would say : Begin at once the struggle with yourself which you Avill liaA'o to make some day, and you Avill spare yourself many years of misery.—M.K.lX