THEODORE HOOK'S JOKE.

Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 3198, 28 September 1881, Page 3

THEODORE HOOK'S JOKE.

A RUSE TOE A DINNER.—HO . HOOK "WON HIS BET.

The following characteristic anecdote of Theodore Hook is given in Barham's life of that extraordinary man. Of the hoax so commonly told and so generally believed as taking place at the Spanish Ambassador's at Woolwich, on tlie banks of the Thames, Mi* Barbara has given a truer and more authentic account. One of the streets near Soho Square, either Dean street or Frith street, was the real scene of action. Hook was lounging upon one of these streets in company with Terry, the actor, when they saw through the kitchen window preparations for a handsome dinner. ' What a feast!' said Terry. ' Jolly dogs ! I should like to make one of them.' ' I'll take any bet,' returned Hook, ' that I do. Call for me here at ton o'clock, and you'll find that I shall be able to give a tolerable account of the worthy gentleman's champagne and venison.' So saying, he marched up the steps, gave an authoritative rap with the burnished knocker, and was quickly lost to the sight of his astonished companion. As a matter of course, he was immediately ushered by the servant, as an unexpected guest, into the drawing-room, where a large party had already assembled. The appartment being well nigh full, no notice was at first taken of his intrusion, and half a dozen people were laughing at his bon mots before the host discovered his mistake. Affecting not to observe the visible embarrassment of tho latter, and ingeniously avoiding any opportunity for explanation, Hook rattled till he had attracted the greater part of the company in a circle near him, and some considerable time elapsed ere the old gentleman I was able to catch the attention of the agreeable stranger. ' I beg your pardon, sir,' he said, contriving at last to get in a word ; ' bnt your name, sir—l did not catch it —servants are so abominably incorrect, and I am really a little at a loss ' ' Don't apologise, I beg,' graciously replied Theodore. ' Smith—my name is Smith —and as you justly observe, servants are always making some stupid blunder or another. I remember a remarkable instance,' etc,

' But really, my dear sir,' continued the host at the termination of the story illustrative of stupidity in servants, ' I think the mistake on the present occasion does not originate in tho' source you allude to : I certainly did not expect the pleasure of Mr Smith's company at dinner to-day.' ' No, I dare say not; you said four in your note, I know, and it is now, I see, a quarter past five —you are a little fast, by the way —but the fact is I have been detained in the city, and I was about to explain when *' ' Pray,' exclaimed the other, as soon as he could stay the volubility of his guest, 'whom may I „9_, do you suppose you arc addressing F' ' Whom ? Why, Mr Thompson, of course —old friend of my father ; I have riot the pleasure, indeed, of being personally known to you, but having received your kind invitation on my arrival from Liverpool —Fifth street, four o'clock, family party —come in boots —you see I have taken you at your word, and I am only afraid that I have kept you waiting.' ' No, no, not at all. But permit me to observe, my dear sir, my name is not exactly Thompson—it is Jones, and —' ' Jones !' repeated the . . ' disant Smith, in admirably assumed consternation. ' Jones ! Why, surely I cannot have, yes I must — good gracious I see it all. My dear sir, what an unfortunate blunder! Wrong house! What must you think of such an intrusion ? lam really at a loss for words to apologise. You will pprmit me to retire at present, and to-morrow—' ' Pray don't think of retiring,' exclaimed the hospitable old gentleman ; your Iriend's j table must have been cleared long ago, if, as you say, four o'clock was the hour named, and I am only too happy to be able to offer you a seat at mine.' Hook, of course, could set think of any such thing—could not think of trespassing upon the kindness of a perfect stranger; if too late for Thompson's there were plenty of chop-houses at hand. The most unfortunate part of the buisness was, he had made an appointment with a gentleman to call for him at ten o'clock. The good natured Jones, however positively refused to allow so entertaining a visitor to withdraw dinnerless. Mrs Jones joined in the solicitation ; .the Misses Jones smiled bewitcbingly; and at last Mr Smith, who soon recovered from his confusion, was prevailed upon to offer his arm to one of the ladies, aud take his place at the well-furnished board. In all probability the family of Jones never passed such an evening before. Hook naturally exerted himself to the utmost to keep the party in an unceasing roar of laughter, and made good tho first impression. The mirth grew fast and furious, when, by way of a coxip de grace, he seated himself at the pianoforte and struck off into one of those extemporaneous effusions which had filled more critical judges than the Joneses with delight and astonishment. Ten o'clock struck, and, on Mr Terry being announced, his triumphant friend wound up the performance with the explanatory stanza: — I am very much pleased with your fare, Your cellar's as prime as your cook; My friend's Mr Terry, the player, And I'm Mr Theodore Hook.