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Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 3018, 26 February 1881, Page 4

A zealous but ignorant negro preacher, in expounding to his flock the astoundingnature of miracles, pot a trifle confused in the matter. He stiid —" My beloved friends, the greatest of all miracles was bout de loaves and fishes. Dere was five thousand loaves and two thousand fishes, and the twelve 'postles had to eat' 'em all, and de miracle is dey didn't bust!" A debtor, who had " failed badly," being called upon by a creditor, showed his books, and told him he'd pay him sixpence in the pound.—" But," said the creditor, " according to your books your assets will pay only four pence in the pound!"—" I know that," responded the debtor, with an air of great candour and magnanimity. " I know that my assets will pay but four pence in the pound; but, sir, I'm an honest man, and sooner than let my creditors suffer, VIZ make up the diffierence out of my own pocJcet .'" Mathews once went to Wakefield, then, from commercial failures, in a dreadful state. In vain did he announce his inimitable "Youthful Days," the Yorkshiremen came not. When he progressed to Edinburgh, a friend asked him if he had made much money in Wakefield—" Not a shilling," was the reply—"Not a shilling !" reiterated his astonished acquaintance. " Why, didn't you go there to star ?"— "Yes," replied Mathews, with mirthful mornfulness, " but they spell it with ye in Wakefield."