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Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 2992, 27 January 1881, Page 3

" I never did see such a wind and such a storm," said a man in a coffee-room. " And pray, sir," inquired a would-be wit, " since you saw the wind and the storm, what might their colour be ?" " The wind blew and the storm rose," was the ready rejoinder. To be told—as we arc by a Society paper which devotes much attention to female costume —that hackneyed old tartans are coming again into fashioa tempts one to exclaim with the poet : Is civilisation a failure, Or isn't the Tartan plaid out ?

Says a Canadian paper : " The Marquis of Lome en Canadian Agriculture" ran, a day or two ago, a line in the daily papers. A year or so since it was " The Marquis of Lome on the Psalms of David." When it conies to " The Marquis of Lome on his way home" we shall have much to be thankful for.

A preacher took passage in one of the Lake .Erie boats on a Sunday. He bad not been long on board before he applied for permission to hold a religious meeting. " No," said ehe captain, to whom the application was made, " any minister who would travel on a Sunday isn't fit to preach on board my boat." A Philadelphia servant girl, while washing windows, spattered water in the face of a passing gentleman. He looked, was conquered, married her, and turns out to be worth 20,000 dollars. A?l the men in Philadelphia now have to walk in the middle of the street, even if they are not worth twenty-five cents.

A short time ago a little boy went with, hie father to see a colt. He patted the colt's head, and made quite a fuss over it, until finally the stableman told him to be careful that the colt did not turn round and kick him. When the little chap went home, his mother asked him what ne thought of the colt. " I like it pretty well," was the reply. "He's real tame in front, but he's awful wild behind."

(.For continuation of news see fourth page.)