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Daily Telegraph (Napier), Issue 2986, 20 January 1881, Page 2

The programme for the Hawke's Bay Regatta is published in another column.

Mass will be celebrated by the Rovd. E. Reignier next Sunday at Havelock at 11 a.m.

The general meeting of members of the Napier Club, advertised for Friday evening, is postponed until Tuesday evening next.

Messrs Banner and Liddle will sell at their rooms, Tennyson-street, to-morrow, a town section at Havelock, with a dwelling house thereon.

The s.s. Go-Ahead leaves the Spit at 5 o'clock this evening for Wellington, so as to enable passengers to be present at the Wellington regatta.

The Port Ahuriri District School Committee have nominated the Eevd. D. Sidey and Rechab Harding, Esq., as members of the Education Board.

Calcutta sweeps will be held at Messrs Kennedy and Gillman's store this evening on the grand handicap pigeon match to come off at Clive to-morrow.

The exhibition of dissolving views, announced to take place at St. John's schoolroom this evening, has been postponed till to-morrow evening.

Professor Haslmayer will give a matinee performauce at the Theatre Royal tomorrow, commencing ai; 3 o'clock. The prices are—Dress circle, la, other seats, 6d.

We remind the original members of the Hawke's Bay Amateur Athletic Club, and those gentlemen who have received post cards, that the meeting takes place tomorrow night at the Masonic Hotel at 8 o'clock.

The Lydia Howarde troupe are about to visit Napier. They open on Monday evening next for a short season of four nights. They play a new burlesque each night, and as we understand they form the strongest burlesque company that has visited Napier for some time we have no doubt they will have a successful season.

The first annual meeting of the Kaiapoi Woollen Factory Company since its enlargement was held at Christchurch yesterday. The balance-sheet showed a balance ot £1638 18s Bd. It was proposed to pay a dividend of 5 per cent, for the half year. The report showed that the liabilities amounted to £48,079 18s 4d, and the assets £49,718 17s. After considerable discussion the report was adopted.

Major Routledge held the usual monthly inspection of the Rifle Volunteers last evening, and after the usual evolutions had been gone through by the corps, under the command of Ciptain Batham, Major Routledge complimented the oorps upon their general appearance and the good order of their accoutrements. He expressed regret at the small attendance, but the public holiday explained that away. The class-firing badges were distributed, and the corps then dismissed.

A cricket match between eleven of the Port Ahuriri and Napier Clubs was played at Hastings yesterday. From tli9 fact that a number of the players on both sides have been selected to play against the Australians the game possessed a particular interest to cricketers in the district. With the exception of Kindall, Atherton, and Pram, all the batsmen showed poor form, and a miserable account of duck's-eggs and units. The Napier team won the match by 5 runs, the scores being—Napier, 32 and U ; and the Port, 26 and 35.

It was announced at the inspection parade of the Artillery Volunteers on Tuesday evening that the challenge cup, won by the Artillery in their contest with the Rifle Association at the recent annual firing, will be shot for by the individual members of the corps on the third Monday in each month, the first firing to take place next Monday. The raneres are 200, 300, 400, and .500 yards, five shots at each range. The cup has to be won twice, not necessarily in succession, to entitle the winner to permanent possession. Carbines are allowed two points.

At a meeting of the Spit Fire Brigade, held on Tuesday evening:, the resignation of the secretary, Mr Frederick Watson, was handed in, owing to his intended departure from this colony. The Superintendent, in accepting the same, acknowledged the many services rendered by Mr Watson, and expressed the regret which the members of the Brigade felt at losing him from their number. As a small taken of their regard, it was resolved to present him with a shield containing the photographs of all the members of the Brigade, accompanied by a grold locket. The Superintendent concluded by wishing Mr and Mrs Watson a pleasant and speedy voyage, and assuring him of the well wishes he carried with him.

The Regatta Committee held a meeting last night at the Criterion Hotel, the following members being present, Messrs W. TJ. Burke (in the chair), T. R. Cooper, W. Bogle, S. E. Cooper, Gilberd, Upohurch, and R. Price. The minutes of the previous meeting having been read and confirmed, the sub-committee's report was brought up, recommending tbe Ngaruroro as the water for the reg-atta, and making other recommendations with respect to the programme and rules. The adoption of the report was moved by Mr Price, and seconded by Mr T. R. Cooper. Mr S. E. Cooper moved and Mr Upchurch seconded as an amendment to the first recommendation, that the regatta be held in the inner harbor. ' The orignal motion was carried, and the report adopted. The sub-committee was instructed to advertise the programme as early as possible in the Napier, Wellington, and Gisborne papers.

Says an English paper:—lf wo may form an opinion from recent developments of grain growing in New Zealand, that colony will shortly become a competitor with the United States and Canada in tho markets of the world. It is true that it is severely handicapped by distance, but as the cost of carriage when once shipped is merely nominal, the imports from the Antipodean colony may act as a check on the rapacity of the shippers in America, who now get decidedly the best of the bargain, the actual raisers receiving very little of tho money paid for the crops,

A new form of brick, which has been patented by Mr Hart, of Birmingham, is made with eight stud-like projections "at the bottom, the top of each brick having corresponding indentations to receive them. ;'lu.i brick not only saves labour, but also gives greater strength and durability than is obtained by the use of ordinary bricks.

The Builder says the ceilings of carnages on tho Great Northern Midland, and Lancashire and Yorkshire railways have been painted with luminous paint, and passenger trains composed of these carriages when passing in the daytime through long tunnels, have not now to be lighted by means of oil-lamps, as is usually the case, there being sufficient light reflected from the luminous paint.

A West Coast contemporary thus goes for a theatrical company lately visiting the digging townships:—" The only drawback, inour eyes, to the whole ontertainment was that the company suddenly became exceedingly absent-minded, and paid us the high compliment of going off without including us in their financial statement. Being charitably inclined, we suppose they will put our amount on the estimates." Northern papers take warning.

James Lester, an American lecturer, has been distinguishing himself in Manchester. He delivered a lecture in Albert Square there recently on the " Iniquity of Erecting Monuments and Statues while Millions of People are Starving," and enforced his arguments by taking a hammer out of his pocket and knocking off the base of one of the carvings of the Albert Memorial. At the Police Court he admitted the offence, saying he flattered himself he had made an impression on the people. Then he was fined 30s, but, in order to make a further impression on the people, he refused payment, and went to gaol for fourteen days.

Says Truth of November 3rd:—"Mr Mapleson, who recently arrived at New York with his opera troupe, does not give a very flattering account of the New York Custom House officers. Interviewed by a reporter, he said —' One of the officers objected to Gerster having twelve pairs of gloves, and another fussed because Belloca brought the same number of chemises, just as if a lady should only bring dirty linen with her. Another official told me that they were obliged to be so very particular, because the Government employed detectives to watch the officers, spies to watch the detectives, and two convicted thieves to watch the spies.' What an interesting comment upon the advantages of a high tariff and protection."

Referring to Mr Bryce's resignation, tbe Hawera Star remarks :—" We have no hesitation in saying that Mr Bryce's desire to take active measures against Te Whiti fairly represents the feeling which prevails almost unanimously along this coast. The settlers dislike, and are tired of being exposed to the continued and ever-threatening risk of a murderous raid. They know that if resistance and bloodshed should result from active measures against Te Whiti, it would mean ruin to many, and heavy losses to nearly all of those near the frontier. But they believe that some day or other the difficulty will have to be faced, and would gladly see it attempted now, even though the worst should happen. Te Whiti is a man of peace to-day, but his tongue is a powerful weapon, and may be used as a sharp sword against the pakeha at any moment."

An Egyptian desert snail was received at the British Museum on March 25, 1846. The animal was not known to be alive, as it had withdrawn into its shell, and the specimen was accordingly gummed, mouth downward, on to a tablet, duly labelled and dated, and left to its fate. Instead of starving, this contented gasteropod simply went to sleep in a quiet way, and never woke up again for four years. The tablet was then placed in tepid water and the shell loosened, when the dormant snail suddenly resuscitated himself, began walking about the basin, and finally sat for his portrait, which may be seen of life-size in Mr Woodward's Manual of (he Mollusca. During those four years the snail had never eaten a mouthful of any food, yet he was quite as well and flourishing at the end of the period as he had been at its beginning.

" Does oat grain alter in weight per bushel by keeping ? " is a question when, if put to agriculturists is variously answered Perhaps the general opinion is that the grain does go in quantity, but becoming drier, harder, and firmer, is heavier per bushel. The opportunity afforded to test this point was taken advantage of lately. Having ascertained the weight per bushel when cut, without dressiug as for market or for seed, the grain from Aboyne was kept for five weeks thinly spread on a floor, and then four weeks in small bags, and again weighed. In each case the total weight was less, and the weight per bushel was also less. Wheat and barley being much heavier, however, than water, will, by losing water, probably in every case increase m weight per bushel; while the oats being just about tbe same weight as water (rather heavier when plump, lighter when long), will, in the case of fine quality, probably increase in weight per bushel by keeping, but interior quality will decrease in weight per bushel.—North British AgricuLuriat.

Among the most extraordinary of the tyrannical regulations of the ixussian police is one which strictly forbids any ono to touch a dead or dying man without the direct sanction of the police. In consequence of this arbitrary enactment it is no uncommon thing to see a man lying bleeding and helpless from a severe fall in the streets of Moscow or St Petersburg without any one daring to assist him To what extent this curious tyranny is carried it may be judged from a single instance. An English gentleman residing at Peterhof, a coast town about sixteen miles from St. Petersburg, one morning found his Russian groom hanging by the neck in the stable, and cut him down at once, just in time to save his life. The next day he received a visit from the local inspector of police, who, far from commending his prompt humanity, vehemently abused him for dariDg to transgress the law. Tho Englishman heard him to the end without a word, and then said quietly,' Well, Mr Inspector, I'm extremely sorry to have done anything, but I'll make all the amends in my power. If 1 find you hanging anywhere, I pledge you my honour I won't cut you down.'

The Pleasant Creek News gives the following narrative of an interesting competition :—" A novel and interesting- trial of strength and skill, which assumed a very useful direction, took place at Glcnorchy a couple of days ago, in one of the fields belonging to Mr * ainpbell, for one pound a side. Two men, named respectively J. Woods and F. Cocking, challenged two residents of Glerorchy named Turvy and Bailey to a match at sheaf-binding. The terms of tbe match were that whatever side bound the most sheaves following the reaping machine in two hours in the cleanest and best fashion would be the victors, each side to bind alternate hours. After tossing, Woods and Cocking took the field, and commenced operations, following the reaper. In the first hour they bound" GSI sheaves apiece. The Glenorchy men then went to the straw and put together 67-1 each. Woods and Cocking took their places for the second time, and bound 700 sheaves each, and the Glenorchyites in their turn bound 74-1, thus beating "their opponents by thirty-four sheaves. When the match was concluded the competitors were very much exhausted. The trial of strength and skill was a severe one, and was a credit to all the parties concerned."

Amongst recent Australian news there came to hand a brief telegram relating to the narrow escape from death of a tightrope performer in Melbourne. Tho Argus gives fuller particulars, thus :—Mr Alfred Rowe, of Ballarat, better known as " Onzalo," the Australian Bloudin, appeared on a wire rope, about half an inch in diameter, stretched a distance of about 20ft from the ground on a vacant lot at tho corner of Roden and Spencer streets. There -were about 6000 spectators, and tho

first part:of the performance, which included "many feabs, such as walking in baskets, tho chair-and-table performance, and other dangerous tricks, passed off successfully. Mr Rowe then essayed to carry over a boy upon his back. Unfortunately, the boy upon whom he relies, and who is trained to the business, was not in attendance, and he therefore selected a lad from among those present. The boy was strapped to his back, and the journey had almost been accomplished in safety when the boy became nervous, and clutched the rope-walker by the neck. He also twisted his foot round that of the man carrying' him, and ultimately threw his foot off the rope. As a consequence, the performer fell; but preserving his presence of mind, he caught the rope with his leg, and afterwards regaining hold by one hand he preserved himself from falling. By great exertions he passed, with the boy upon his back, along the rope to the stage, where the boy was taken off by a policeman. Onzalo then vaulted on the stage himself. After the boy had been removed in safety to the ground, the performer again crossed the rope and descended on the other side amidst great applause. In view of the danger involved, a " dummy" will in future take the place of the boy carried over the rope.

Well-informed woman: Lor bless ye, them pic tors fetches a mint o' money. IV heard as sum on 'em is wuth more than tho goold frames they pub 'em in ! A young man married a deaf and dumb girl, but soon afterwards she recovered both speech and hearing, and he has applied for a divorce. He says ib is an out» rageous swindle. "Mamma," said little Nell, "ought governess to flog me for what I've not done?" "No, my dear. Why do you ack ?" " Cause she Hogged me to-day when I didn't do my sum."

" Can't you steer tho mainmast down the forecastle stairs ?" said a sea captain to a new hand. " Yes, sir, I can, if you'll stand below ancl coil it up." Tho captain didn't catechize that man any more.

A skipper of a Down east coaster named the ''■ Hyena," was recently asked what his vessel wa3 named after. His honest and sober reply was :" I don't know. I expect it's the name of some great man in Congress," An aristocratic Now Yorker, on being requested by a rich and vulgar young man for permission to marry " one of his girls," gave a rather crushing reply ; " Certainly; which would you prefer, the housemaid or the cook?"

" Madam," said a doctor to a patient recently, " when .anything is cured it's ended." "lean tell you something that ain't ended when it's cured," said a little boy who happened to hear the remark. " What is it?" asked the doctor, smilingly. " A ham!"

A young artist who lives in a boardinghoure wants to know how he can learn to play the violin without disturbing the other boarders. Soap your bow, young man, soap your bow and bathe the strings twice a day in sweet oil. Then you can sit up all night and play overtures, and nobody will mind it.

A soldier of a cavalry regiment was brought up for stealing his comrade's liquor ration. He was an Irishman, and his defence was unique, " I'd be sorry indade, surr, to be called a thief. I put the liquor in the same bottle, and mine was at the bottom, and sure I was obliged to drink his to get at my own !"

Edwin : "So glad to meet you and your sister here, Miss SpifSington—old friends are always so charming ; but I assure you that I have been so dull I could tolerate my bitterest enemy for a change."—[He little thought his Angelina had followed him on the Pier and was standing close behind him Wasn't there the deuce of row, though.]

They were talking about emergencies, and somebody asked a mild-looking stranger what he would do if suddenly placed in great peril. He said he hardly knew, but thought he should follow his usual practice and crawl under the bed. Tho ladies in the party thought he must be afraid of thunder storms, but the men knew he was married.

Literary young man at party—<Miss Jones, have you seen Crabbe's Tales ?' Young lady (scornfully)—' I was not aware that crabs had tails.' Literary young man (covered with confusion) —' I beg your pardon. I should have said read Crabbe's Tales.' Young lady (angrily scornful) — 'And I was not aware that red crabs had tails either.' Exit young man.

The following colloquy took place outside a houre in an American city, between some country visitors, unable to obtain entrance, and a German living next door : " Jane at home, did you say ?" " Nein, Chane's nod at home." "Where is she?" She's gone the cemetery down." "When will she come back?" " Oh, she won't come already any more ; she's gone to stay ; she's det ?" A gentleman travelling in a railway carriage was endeavoring, with considerable earnestness, to impress some argument upon a fellow passenger who was seated opposite to him, and who appeared rather dull of apprehension. At length, being slightly irritaied, he exclaimed, in a louder tone, " Why, sir, it's as plain as ABC ? " " That maybe," quietly replied the other, "but I am DEF?"

A lady (not a hundred miles from Dunsandel, and evidently unacquainted with bicycles), was out in her front yard watering* her thirsty flowers when a young man walking hastily along the road, came up to the gate and enquired if she had seen a man pass on a bicycle. She dropped her water-ing-pot, and said she had not, adding, " But I'll tell you what I did see. I don't know as you'll believe it—l'm sure I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself. It was one wheel of a waggon running away with a man ; and I never was so frightened in my life!" VV hat'll them saxons find out next. Talk about storms and sighmoons a-coming out of them sun's spots, why it's all nonsence. Ain't the sun a loominant as never changes his spot, but sticks to his post by his own sentryfugle force. It's my belief as the aquator has had too much latitood with cutting capericorns all over the place, and has gob a cancer or something in consequence ; and though I don't set myself up as an astronymcr, I do think as a good dose of them solar physics might do it good. Anyhow, it's a shame to say as it's the sun's spots as does the mischief, when everybody can see as it's the rain's spots.

" You see," said the despondent man, who was sitting on a barrel, addressing the grocer, who was spearing the top of a biscuit case with a knife, " some people has good luck and some people has bad luck. Now I remember I was once walking along the street with Tom Jellicks, and he went down one side of ib, and I went down the other. Wo hadn't gone more'n half way down when he found a pocket-book with £50 in it, and I stepped on a woman's dress and so got acquainted with my present wife. It was always so," added he, with a sigh, " that Tom Jellicks was the luckiest man in the world, and I never had no luck."

A few days ago, while an excursion from out on the Lake Shore road was spreading itself over Detroit, a pair of lovers seated themselves on the steps of tbe City Hall, and of course took hold of hands. Some of the officers in the building noticed this, and one gentleman offered to bet that they would squeeze for a straight hour without breaking their hold. The bet was taken, and a third person took his station where he could watch the result. It was an awful hot day, but that didn't make the least difference. At the end of forty minutes the two red hands were still quietly clasped. So they -were when five minutes more would have struck the hour. Then the young man niade an uneasy movement. Leaning over her flaxen curls, he said : " Samautha, I'm going to let go of your hand for a minute; but you won't bo mad, will you, darling ? I wouldn't let go till you did, only some sort of an ant is crawling down my back, and I can't keep my mind on you ancl ants at the same time!"