A Nutty Problem

Dominion, Volume 28, Issue 104, 26 January 1935, Page 23

A Nutty Problem

’Do you realise, Pantry People,” asked Nut-cracker in an important voice, "that Mistress has overlooked something very important this year.- ’ "And what may that be?” enquired Four-sifter with a look of surprise. “Has no one else remembered?” queried Nut-cracker .incredulously; and there was an injured tone in his voice. , ~ . “Of course we have,” replied Egg-beater and Mooden-spoon together, “Mistress has forgotten to buy nuts for Christmas.” "Why worry about that?” drawled Four-sifter with a yawn. Theies still time for her to remember. It’s only Christmas Eve yet, and Mistress will most likely buy them to-night.” “But if you take the trouble to think back,” replied Nut-cracker in. very level and precise tones, “you will recall that the nuts for Christmas have, in former years, been bought at least three days before Christmas. Thus I gravely fear that this year they have been forgotten.” “Well, we can do nothing to remedy that,” he remarked. “Nonsense!” contradicted Nut-cracker with dignity; “we can at least do our best to remind Mistress about them. And I here and now call a general meeting of all Pantry People, to seek suggestions and decide.what is .best ,tQ do.” Then, striking an imposing attitude on the highest pantry shelf, Nutcracker prepared to receive suggestions. He was full of importance and worry, and appealed beseeching to his culinary fellows. “All I can think of doing,” begun Lemon-squeezer, “is to put myself in bn important place where Mistress will see. me, and then she will think of lemons, and then perhaps oranges, and then perhaps nuts.” t “Hmm,” grunted Nut-cracker, “not a bad idea, but too many ‘perhapses. I think we must find something better.”

“Ah, I have it!” exclaimed Glass-bowl excitedly. “Last year Mistress put the nuts in me, so if I place myself in a prominent place, she might notice me, and perhaps remember.” “Perhaps so . . . and perhaps not,” came Nut-cracker’s doubtful reply. “You are rather hard to please,” remarked Flour-sifter with a third yawn. “I wouldn't bother suggesting anything to you, even if I did think of a plan. ’ “Silence, smartie!” commanded Nut-cracker with withering scorn. “But come, come vou others; Christmas without nuts would be a terrible thing. Unthinkable! Hasn’t anyone a better suggestion? This problem must be solved.” “Well,” said Bread-board, “I have acorns carved around my edge; they are a kind of nut, you know, so if I could do something to make Mistress take special notice of them perhaps she would remember about the Christmas nuts. ’ “Not much of a suggestion, either,” grumbled Nut-cracker with a frown. “Ha, ha,” scoffed Flour-sifter, “why don’t you do a bit of thinking for yourself. I would like to know, most noble Nut-cracker. Why can’t you lie on one of the shelves with your jaws wide open and a starved look on your empty countenance. Mistress would surely take pity on you then.’ “I’d rather starve for another year, than elicit pity in such an undignified manner, thank you very much,” replied Nut-cracker frigidly. “Perhaps my plan would solve the problem,” suggested Nutmeg-grater. “And what is that?” asked Nut-cracker eagerly. “Well,” came the reply, “if I place myself somewhere where Mistress cannot but notice me, she may say my name to herself, and thus remember the Christmas nuts.” “But how yould your name help her to remember them?” queried Breadboard with a perplexed frown. “Nutmeg-grater; don’t you understand? ‘Nut’-meg-grater, of course,” came the proud reply. Lemon-squeezer burst into loud laughter. “Oh me, oh my! Oh, ha ha ha! Oh, what a notion 1” he roared. “My dear Nutmeg-grater, such intellect necessary to think of such a plan is surely being wasted on such folk as we are. How many moons did it take you to think of such an idea?” “Oh, you needn’t be so sarcastic,” snapped Nutmeg-grater angrily; even if my suggestion isn’t very good, yours wasn’t any better.” “No, no, of course not,” agreed Bread-board, anxious for peace. “I think your idea was very clever indeed, old fellow.” “Can’t any of you think of something we can do,” he pleaded. “Not one of you has given a sensible suggestion yet, and we must have nuts for Christmas if we possibly■ can. Sugar-bin, Egg-beater, Milk-jug, Bread-knife, cant any of you think of something?” There was silence in the pantry. No one could think of anything else to say. Then Breezo, one of the West Wind’s children, who was'playingin the trees just outside the pantry window, peeped in to see what was happening. “Hulloa, Paper-bag,” he exclaimed, seeing who was sitting on a shelf near the open window. Breezo was very fond of playing with empty paper-bags, and was hoping for a game to-day. But then he noticed that everyone was looking worried. “I say,” he continued, “what’s the matter?” Paper-bag quickly told Breezo of the trouble, and explained that no one could think of a solution to tlie problem. “Aha, I’ve an idea,” came the reply after a moment’s deep thought; “come on, let’s try it.” And before Paper-bag realised what was happening Breezo had blown him off the pantry shelf, and on to the floor. The other Pantry People looked on with .interest, but Paper-bag was somewhat amazed. “Whatever is the meaning of this?” he gasped. “You are going to solve this nutty problem,” announced Breezo with a mysterious grin. “Oh, I say, what a joke!” laughed Egg-beater loudly. “Fancy-thinking that empty old Paper-bag could help anyone I” Lemon-squeezer joined in the laughter, and laughed till his sides ached, while Nutmeg-gratei nearly fell off the shelf in his amusement. Everyone thought it such a jeko that poor old Paper-bag wished himself back on the shelf ... or anywhere where he wouldn’t be laughed at. ■ “What utter rubbish,” exclaimed Wooden-spoon as soon as he could make himself heard above the mirth. “Why, paper -bags are such silly things. They split or burst, or get crushed and then are of no use. You, empty, useless, crumpled Paper-bag, won’t help Mistress much. She will just sweep you up when she sweeps the floor, and bhrn you with the rest of the rubbish. I know ..." i At that moment Mistress opened the pantry door. Seeing Paper-bag’ on. | the floor, she stooped and picked him up.- _ I “An empty paper-bag,” she mused. “I wonder where it came from? • . • I Oh I remember; that’s the bag into which the grocer put the packet of creamcracker biscuits yesterday. Cream-crackers? Crackers? Ah, that reminds me. Crackers make me think of nuts, and I had forgotten to buy nuts for Christmas. Thank you, empty paper-bag,” she continued, as she smoothed out his crumpled creases, “thank you for reminding me about the nuts. What would Christmas be without nuts!”—“O.M.” ,