WITHOUT PREJUDICE

Dominion, Volume 15, Issue 14, 11 October 1921, Page 4

WITHOUT PREJUDICE

NOTES AT RANDOM

(By

T.D.H.)

Unusual activity is reported in the . crater of Mount Ruapehu.—Farmers will learn with a grim satisfaction of the possibility of something going up in these days. It would simplify matters if instead of starting a shipping war the United States would start a war on warship building. Retrenchment is beginning.—The Prisons Board, in its annnaUreport, explains what valuable savings can be effected by not putting people In gaol. “If I were Prime Minister," said a speaker at the Farmers* Union meeting, “I should be glad to Ire pressed to do my duty."—As our old friend Touchstone said, there is much virtue in an if. Extract from our evening contemporary:— Mr. Polson s iasatdiwshr. dmwfmfwy , I am inclined to give this outrageous aspersion an unqualified denial. Mr. Polson is neither the one nor the other. One assumes that it is on the principle of an old dog for a hard road that Mr. G. AV. Russell, of Christchurch, has been accepted by Mr. AVilford as tho Liberal candidate for the Auckland East seat.—Still there was a time when the Liberal Party could get Auckland candidates for Auckland seats. "The amphibious machine which lately arrived from Auckland” is the latest description of the seaplane.—The flame is •no doubt justified by its habit of "landing” on the water. There is a gentleman in America named Charles M. Schwab who has been telling people that they should meet the troubles of the day -with a laugh. This excellent advice was responsible for the accompanying outbreak: — Let’s take our cue from Charlie Schwab, And join the chuckling, laughing mob— Ha! Ha! Bread’s up another cent; • Ho! Ho! 'The landlord’s raised the rent; Hee! Hee! AVe’ll soon bo in .? tent. Ha Ha! Haw Haw! Hoe Hee! Our coal’s to cost a fearful price. Ha! Ha! AVe’ll pay a whole lot more for ice. Haw! Haw ! And higher taxes—ain’t that nice? Hee! Hee! ’Now don’t say things will cost Stillmore (AVo got the giggles once before), We’d have hysterics—kick the floor — Tee, heel Har liar! AVOAV AVOAA !

Ailsa Craig, the scene of the shipwreck at the entrance to the Firth of Clyde, is one of the most remarkable objects round the coasts of the British Isles. It i.s a huge mass of rock rising sheer out of the ocean, ten miles from land, io a height of 1100 feet. At one spot only is a landing possible. Imagine a lump of rock about twice the height of Mount A r ictoria sticking stark up in tlio middle of Cook Strait and you have an idea of what Aisla Craig is like. Keats was once inspired to write a sonnet, to the rock: "Hearken, thou craggy ocean pyramid,” he said, but after that beginning he tangle? himself up between poetry ‘and geology, _which don’t mix ■well, but these lines give tho main facts: Thy life is but two dead eternities. The last in air, the former in the deep. Geologically The rock is a mystery., as it is of a stone of the rarest occurrence in the British’ Isles. Scotsmen, by some means or other, discovered that it made excellent curling stones for their national game—how they found that out L don’t know, as -Aisla is the last place for curling or any other exercise except clinging. The- result is that about three-fourtus of the curling stones in use come from the island. It was from ihe rock that the Earl of Cassilis. in 1831. took his title as Marquis of Aisla, and unless he has been disposing of his estates he is still the owner of Ailsa with its thousands of solan geese, its rabbits and goats, and. the lighthousekeeper and 'his family. Some odious comparisons have been made of late concerning the respective merits of leaders of the various Parliamentary groups. The Professor informs me that he has been making careful calculations which have led him. to the important discovery that the absence of Mr AVilford in the Auckland East electorate weakens his party’s voting strength by at least 10 per cent.; whereas if Mr. Massey were to absent himself on a similar electioneering mission he would reduce the' voting power of his partv bv less than 21 per cent. It na-. iura'llv follows, the Professor adds that Mr. AVilford is four times as valuable 'to .his party as Mr. Massey is to the Reform Partv. By tho same process of reasoning. I. find if is four times as important for the Liberal Party to win tho Auckland East seat as it is for the Reform Party to do so: which perhaps accounts for Mr. Wilford’s nurned flight to the north to help things along. Dr. Bumpus is pleased’ to see the farmers eo urgent in demanding that Ministers of the Crown and members of I at-; liament shall retrench themselves. Ihe fanners have "been retrenched hard enough, yet merchants, Civil servants, trades unionists, and others show Lie strongest reluctance to follow their example. Like the small boy and the cold bath at six o’clock on a frosty winter« morning they stand there pn ing i s one foot and then the other and shre-. ering in tho row atmosphere of inflation instead of warming themselves m the waters of economy at fifteen degrees befow zero Fahrenheit. As even'body demands retrenchment and noWy wiH wSreneh themselves, ei re tho Doctor can see is fol the ent s Th , will reduce the problem to the impW -e them all to wiU n have to stand out of the retrenehgive the tool’s need applj, as look after that himself. THE SPORTING PARSON'S SWEEP. News par.-Rew. —, of Auckland, lectured on Sunday in church on - Hgion and Racing.’” He supported in£“Tho Punter” writes:— The parson doffed his surplice, to the vestin' he repaired. For the service it was over, and the sermon he’d prepared Had been swallowed by the multi.ul . now hastening for home, Not. thinking of the metaphor nnd beefy epitome. The verger stole a look to see if anyone was near, . . Ami half the Board of AVardens tiptoed, anxiously, with fear, To the cosy little where die parson, very • • i«. Held up a little envelope, sent’ in by special mail. "Amytlias?” asked a warden old, with tingiAi-s all a-shake; “Rouc.n ii ” inquired another one. "Quick quick, for goodness sake!” "John/llyttuß, Tenakoa,” hiss the war. dens all aglow— But tho parson answered sadly, soltly, brokenly and low. “This little note,” he said—and then he gulped away a sob, “I, just to say that Duggie Stewart lost our thirty bob.”