THE HERO AT HOME

Dominion, Volume 9, Issue 2687, 5 February 1916, Page 13

THE HERO AT HOME

A CHARACTERISTIC STUDY

By W. Pott Ridge, in the "Daily Mail."

"By rights,-" urged Private Warner, "I ought really to hop off home first and see mother."

"My dear young friend," said the Mayor impressively, "try to understand this. The afternoon's programme lias been most carefully arranged, most thoroughly planned. I myself have given hours that might have been devoted to my business to the task of supervising the principal details. And I do implore of you to allow us to keep to tho time-table, to observe the rules laid down, and in short " "Right you are, sir," agreed Warner. "Only mother is rather particular. Still, I place myself entirely in your hands. What number 'bus do we look out for?"

"'Bus!" echoed the Mayor cheerfully.' "'Bus, indeed! We don't take heroes by 'buses. What next, t wonder?"

Ihe driver of the open car waiting outside the London terminus touched tho peak of his cap as the two prepared to step in. Warner ejaculated, "What ho, Charlie, my lad," and, shaking hands with something approaching violence, inquired _ concerning the health of the driver's wife and babies. On the journey the Mayor, after half closing his eyes and rehearsing silently an impending speech, mentioned that Warner W 2 U . do well not to be too generous in affability. Smiling features, yes; conversation with Tom, Dick, and Harry, no. Otherwise, the day's proceedings would never come to a finish. Folk began to identify the occupants of the car and to run after it. Policemen saluted. From the open windows at the top_ of tramway-cars people cheered. Private Warner tugged at his belt, fingered his moustache, rubbed his face with a handkerchief, and remarked that the day "had suddenly turned warm. At the large public-house flags were at all the windows; a band was playing close by. The Mayor issued orders and one of these was taken by a messenger, fleet of foot; the music stopped and the Mayor nodded approvingly as the early bars came, of the air that welcomes conquerors. ."Everything thought out beforehand," lie mentioned t-o his perturbed companion. , Cheers as the car pulled up, and an inspector of police ordered way to be made for the approach of some of the leading inhabitants of tho borough. Warner glanced nervously around at the crowd; a voice that called, "Tommy, lad, can you see me? It's your TJncle James, and I've brought your mother!" This distracted his attention, and the Mayor had to remind him that folk of .importance were speaking to him. It 'was a jumble of conversation, made up of:

•. "A credit to the borough, my boy. That's what you are." _ ' "Happy to wclcome you back safe and sound. We're proud of you, sir." "Great day this for a_ young man like you. _ You'll remember it all your life." "We're doing you honour, laddie, and I don't miiid saying you deserve it." A young woman tendered a bouquet, and, stepping up, kissed. Private Warner, to ins extreme confusion.

"My daughter," explained the Mayor, as the car went on. "She exceeded my instructions, but perhaps she was carried away by the impulse of the moment."

"I wish," said young Warner, fervently, "that the impulse of the moment had carried hor away a bit earlier. When I'm kissed, I don't want 110 audience."

A.t' tho town hall the crowd forced the car to go slowly. The band, arriving, gave patriotic tunes. Tho Mayor issued orders and 110 one took any notice of them. Warner was pulled from tho car -and carried shoulder high by two strong men. By a string of miracles lie pieesntly found himself on the platform of a long room, where the closelyjammed company of picked and chosen residents gave him a welcome that was refreshingly subdued. Ho was led to a seat next to the large chair to be occupiedby the companion of his journey from' town. ,

"1 map it all out," complained that gentleman with appearing suddenly. "I check it all, and I have it all put down in black 'and white. And then, at the- list moment —Oh, here you are, Warner! What on earth became of you? There was a newspaper man thera. readj to take us." "I never photograph well." "But I do!" ■

The agenda was presented by. the Town Clerk. Mr. Mayor,* it was pointed out, was to speak first, Alderman llawlings would make a few remarks; and then Private AVarner was to reply. Tho guest, interposing, said at once that .Private AVarner would do nothing of the kind. "You're a very foolish and stupid young man," declared the Mayor severely, in an undertone, "and I wish to goodness I was dealing with someone possessing a fair average amount of common sense I" He rose. "Ladies and gentlemen," he said, and beamed as applause came, "we are here to-day to meet ono _of the bravest hearts, one of the brightest minds, one of the most acute intellects that ever fought in the sacred cause of King and country. (Cheers.) AVhen I mention tho name of Private Thomas AVarner— (renewed cheering)—the thoughts of you who havo read- of his great exploit on that memorable Tuesday "

"Thursday," corrected Warner. "On that memorable' Tuesday " "A Thursday, I keep on telling you. I was there, and I ought to know. I made a joke at the time about it being early closing day.". "On that memorable occasion" (compromising) "your thoughts, I say, go back to the never-to-be-forgotten scene, which I will attempt, very briefly, to de-. scribe. It appears that Mr. Mayor, not a military expert, was compelled to accept other amendments from his neighbour in the early stages; theso ceased when the speech entered on the phase of compliments. Warner; blushing confusedly, stared at the windows, gazed «t the ceiling, became interested 111 . the rvdjustment of his puttees, 'fanned himself with the agenda, glanced around, as though in search of an emergency exit. Mr. Mayor finished on a high note of enthusiastic flattery. Tho senior aiderman offered, in an oration of some length, what he described as his humbio tribute. Private Warner, before this was ended, seemed to have become acclimatised to praise. A cheque for a hundred pounds was handed to him. "Very much obliged to you," ho said ; '■'and now, if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get alone; and see mv mother." A recruiting sergeant intercepted him as ho was leaving, and after argument a bargain was struck. If AVarner spoke for five minutes at an outdoor meeting then tho sergeant would explain the ingenious arrangement by which'a cheque could be transferred to another person.

It was raining later when Private Warner turned the corner of his street. Tho applauding shouts were still in his ears; he felt too proud to whistle. This was fame. This- was public estimation. This was recompense. "Well, mother," he said, "hern I am, and hero I've brought something for you."

The stout, neatly dressed woman looked at the endorsed cheque and placed it for safety under the brass candlestick on the precisely arranged mantelpieeo. '-'Clad to see you home again;

Thomas," she began, sedately, "and I hope you are not too puffed up by all the fuss. How dnre you," breaking off into tones of solemn amazement, "however dare you have the cool imiwdenco to stalk right into my'best room with them dirty muddy boots on? Go out into the kitchen at once and take 'em off this very minute. That is, unless you want me to box your ears for you. AVouldn't bo the first time, you know. And not likely to be tho last!"