MANNERS.

Dominion, Volume 7, Issue 1867, 29 September 1913, Page 9

MANNERS.

THE ENGLISHMAN'S LACK OF THEM, LORD ROSEBERY'S VIEWS. "Lord Rosebery never speaks in public .without saying something that is worth hearing, and his speech to the boys of Guildford Grammar School deserves to be pondered by an audience far larger than that which was immediately addressed," flays the "Morning Post." "Lord Rosebery waß concerned to impress on. his youthful hearers the extreme importance in life of good manners. And it is difficult to djSputo Lord Rosebery's conclusion that in the present ago manners ore deteriorating," adds the "Morning Post." . "There was a. politeness, not merely in the modish eighteenth century, but even in the material mid-Victorian age, which wo aro losing in obedience to a devotion to what is supposed to be freedom and sincerity, but what is really lack of. self-respect. It is not thought tvortn while to pay those ; little ceromonious observances by which consider-, ation for others is shown, becauso it never occurs to us that we ought to receive them. ' _ "No one can, read the letters of George Meredith .without being impressed by the fine courtliness in which even the most casual or the most troublesome correspondent was addressed; and without feeling that the habit of mind which inspired that style is sadly lacking to-day. In particular,- tho manners' of men to women in the present day show a regrettable deterioration. The instinctive deference. to wemon which used to be the ; mark of the well-bred is no longer so evident., There is a tendency to. take women as a matter of course, and to withhold what may .be called the small-ohnoigo of courtesy. "Manners are tlio lubricant that enables the wheels of our oomplex. relationships to revolve withcut intolerable ifriction—that make social contact plea-, surable, or, at least; endurable Manners amf Social Obllgatior). "Good manners aro not a convention, but a social obligation—a - something that everyone should be bound to contribute for the common vieal, an acknowledgment of the claims of others to consideration. Yet we have become so self-conscious in this generation that we are afraid to be polite for fear of appearing affected or absurd, and where we would seem natural we ; are simply off-hand or almost rude. Perhaps Lord Rosebery's exhortation will fall on good ground and bear fruit, and for reformation we must look to the next generation. The present, one is too old to change its ways, even, when it most frankly confesses its faults," adds the "Post;"

' "I wish to make it clear at the very beginning of what I have to say," said Lord Itosebory, "that I am addressing as I was told to address, the boys, and not the parents. I will not say that boys arid parents are permanently hostile bodies—l am'a . parent myself—but there is certainly a great difference of view on many questions to which I need not further allude, such as pockotmoney, the amount of work that an able-bodied boy can do, and so forth'. "Now, the point I wish to labour for the moment is that of courtesy and good manners,'' added Lord Rosebery. 'The. 1 necessity of them had been sefcri by one of the great saints-of the educational oaleridar, William of Wykeham, who is honoured as the founder of Winchester College and-New ford. It is well for ,us in' tliis ceritUr.i ' to 1 know the emphasis which was laid by your founders on courtesy and manners. Why \did "these" men' of- the early seventeenth century emphasise the importance of courtesy and good manners? I take.it that it was for two reasons: first, that they were models of courtesy and pood manners themselves—for the Englishmen of the seventeenth century were the greatest breed of Englishmen that England has ever' possessed—and also (because, they realised the enormous importance of courtesy arid good manners in the common transactions of life.

English and Scotch Manners. f "Now, we English people, and I am afraid we Scotch people—to mention tho people of tlio country with which I ani more immediately connected—have never been, conspicuous for good manners. John Bull has been too apt to think , tbat good mannerß were a device of dancing, frog-eating Frenchmen, whom it was our duty to despise and defeat. But that was a false issue. Good manners are a. sign of charity towards your follotv-men, of duty towards your neighbours, and also a sign of self-respect. A man who. respects himself is always well mannered to others. Now lam going to say something which, if I knew this school familiarly, I should not say, because I might be thought to be speaking at you instead of speaking to you. - "It is 1 that, I think, one may judgo ,of the character of a school by the respect the boys Bhow to the masters. If we go to a school and notice that tho boys do not touch their hats to their masters, we form, perhaps erroneously, a poorer opinion of that school. What is it that we mean when we touch our hat to our master? Do we not mean that he is the head of our community, and that as the head of our community we pay oursleves a tribute by exalting him? Take the case of the King. When the King goos through the streets, if, we are fortunate enough' to see him, we' take off our hats to him. That is, of course, a mark of Tespect in the first place to the King, but "it is alio a mark of respect to ourselves, a mark of veneration for the community to which we belong, and, in that way, to ourselves.

In Publlo Life. "I am sorry to say I think therelhas been in modern j timos a decay of manners in England, and not only in England,.but all over tho world. You see it even on the Continent. . It is a bad sign. I should like to appeal to the elders for a moment, and ask them whethe'r they do not agreo with what I am going to say. , Manners havo an enormous commercial value in life. I sometimes wonder why they' are not harped on more on these occasions, because no one can havo lived as long as I have without noticing the weight and value of manners in life. In public life I have seen men by appearance and manners get such a start of their much abler follows that they havo been able to occVP,y .P' aoe3 much higher than their i!nJ es ° r Borv ' ce3 entitled them to. Of course, wo are not all going into public life, but wo aro all going into some business. I a m quite sure there is not a _man_ or a lady ovor thirty years old in this hall who has 'any practical knowledge of tho affairs of. life, who will not toll the boys of enormous, advantago of a good appearance and good manners. A good appearance, you may say, is not at our command; good looks aro not at our command; they are the gift of God, and aro bestowed only on a small percentage of mankind. But a good appearance with out self-consciousness, which is tho most disagreeable feature, "perhaps, of appearanco, is within tho command of any boy. Commercial Valuo of Manners. "But let us take manners, which aro, I think, more important. Three boys, let us suppose, aro applying for the same situation. One may be a monster of learning, with a Shakespearean forehead and all the rest of it; the second may not bo half so good a boy, but still an able boy; the third may not havo the abilities of eithor, but if ho has good mannnrs and tho others have not, it is

ten to one on him against the other two. I will not put. my appeal for manners, which aro not easily taught except by example, on higher considerations, such as that they aro signs of a noble nature, expressing itself in outward form, although that is true onough; I will only put it to-day on tho question of the commercial value of manners, and I ask every boy who hears me to-day, oven if ho forgets everything else I have hud to say, to bear in mind tho enormous valuo of manners all through'his life. They will give him a value which ho will never possess without them, and will give him a Start over tlioso other boys who neither try to bo, nor are, wellmannered."