THE CHANGING SCENE.

Dominion, Volume 6, Issue 1646, 13 January 1913, Page 6

THE CHANGING SCENE.

R : ' ' ♦ ! i A BIRD'S EYE VIEW. jC- ■ .... ' :/ : [By 1f.0.K.] S j: : \ "The Soience—how' it is amusing, deni : v .mister!" paid the. intelligent foreigner f.,'.v . . "The Scientist; formerly told us only r about the lopidoptcra and the point al !'>. ■ wiiich tho water boiled. But ono' pro- ; grosses. All progresses. Tho'Sciencoeho sorntinisa , everything. The learned j; : doctors in Melbourne talk of all thingsf •• rainfall, ,iraij. hews, the South Pole, the i. strike,' inicrobos, all • things. But did ! you notico how the Eoienco has her limi- )■■■: . tations?" - f "Where axe her limitations?" asked the .- s native. ■ ■ ■ • [■ "She-cannot deal with the sex adorI able. Regard I Mister tho ProfosSor 'vAdamson essays to deal with tho Australian boy, and what happens ? It is all ;;; about -the Australian girl! The .poor .man imagines, by bluo, that ho is in.conhoi of his-subject. He- does not know :■ tho sex. Ono cannot leave woman out ivi' ;of the question; my old! ' Shi) is at the top and bottom of everything—she /is 1; : chapter one;; and chapter .Inst— the begin- , jiing and the end. How it is droll, to think one can mite a paper on tho boy ■ . Australian! Not possible, dear mister. Name of a pipe, it is impossible to write ■•even of tho weather cycles withdut- the -'B6i adorable forcing her way in, and oocupying all tho space. ' The editor ■■■ Bays, "Bless it all, this is not what one ordered. Ono ordered an analysis of - • .-*■ .weather cycles, and one reocives still- one f ;, Why, then?' . He does not know that She is everything. ■ •Ono speaks of-Man. There is no. such ...- "i-'thinf. K .Man is but a manifestation of , ■ .woman—a : mere symptom..' What is the universe? Only a place for her hairpins to'J-jet lost in. Nor will, Science alter thA.'.vmy old.". - . . .. ..' . ■ , "But, that seems such rot, Hippolyte," .' said the native. ' "Blasphemous, alInost." : "/J",-''.'-' ~ "Perhaps. - But you observed what the scientific Professor said?.No?- He said: 'It is'almost always tho girl.' But obviously.; ■" It is, was, 'will-be, always'tho -,-. '-girl, my old—always! I am therefore - ■' gay. . Would ono have it otherwise ?By blue, no!; Ono could not, anyway. Eh?" •Wednesday's paper declared that Mr. ; : Massey had been informed that tho; bat- . . tleship N.Z. would nrrive on February 29. Tho evening paper made precisely the , ■ same statement: February 29 - was tho date. Tho press never lies. " - . Non-does it over disagree.''' One local -.-papor said that the meeting in tho'Town . 'Hall-on Wednesday to promote a-tree-planting competition or somothing "was v.'. ,' • 'tho largest and, most thoroughly repre. - Eentative over seen in Wellington." And tho evening paper said that "the miserable" attondanoe was "causo for despair," ,' amounting to CO or 70.: \.j ' ■ y.-i '• Ono begins'to feel suspicious ,of tho i '.; press. Almost to the-point of sympathise ■ ,ing with tho firemen.-. . .. . The fireman requires to bo celebrated in a formal way. Ho deserves the mcod of somo melodious lyre. V.. Oh, the fireman, tho fireman! Would you .■ Knovr* what kind of' a.' gentleihori tho fireman Is? . , Noble and good la tho fireman. Just yon .- ' : listen with oare to his -manner, of " , speech. .'.Kind are Ua eyes and bright , as the day v . . ... upon wmeh , the..Government MeteorooV.i:logsl!t predicted a wild wet gale. W ana spare he is, and as soothing and refreshing, as a near or a lieach. Ho subsists upon water, and tho pubMeans lament 1 bitterly' his total in- ..... alirerence to ithe insidious - charm'of ■ 1 ; J",. - : The firoman :'sln^; i liko a'lark ae be stokes Why "liany^ '&-paßscnger eayß: - feUow you : ought to havo been a .bishop, for the church needs men like * - you."' > 'Eli ho 1 smiles' wanly, ,tta 'ona ' who ,has- ... -iii )■' ilearned but. regrets not the vanity of • }hings,"and-goes on with his favour. - ; .lte hymn. . • ■ ' ;' And sometimes he-nibbles'a peppermint, as Bir Eobert Stout: recommends, for - .-. . ho can neither smoke nor chow. '. . ' 'Btrong is the'fireman's soul. '. All his life . long lie is attacked-hy the eourrilous ' ' press, =1---Which, all the'Bame.'ia.unable to pierce J. his-hide or-' shatter 'his pride. '. Pe knows ho is the :King. <)f tho Earth, even ... , _ if nobody-else.knows it, and I confess V s *; X. woiiuer he' doesn't : tell his - accusers to go to that place whoeo. inmates are / ■ everlastingly boiled or fried. .<BiS'heart is full of love for everyone. Yet " . . they do ell, they can to make him . . .. sour: They_.endeavour to sauelch him, yoa, as , "i ; . the worm who is. so frenucntly, : . ■ sauelched. . . But ho . cares very little, • for, after all, V has.'.ho.'not ilr. .Belcher as a strong tower?— ,' . — ■ ■ ... >■ ■, . .; ;> ' And-ho knows that, the fluestion's settled fcj'," as.soon as that, human .volcano, has - belched. - . ; ■ - ■ •.week it was ventured here that the :Labour party was wrong in objecting to latin as a fossil, dead, immutable tongue; It is not dead nt all. Sir Robert . ... 'Stout, iu a,New Year address to Oamaru, ; . . -mentions that 'a newspaper he loves has for its motto: "Piscatories liorninuns." It used to Jjo something else, even so lato as when wo wero at school. Latin does ■ Eppur, si. muovo. Or, as Sir :y . .Robert might'say'in his progressive.way,: ; ; Eppuoreririo 'inoveo. :;- Whether it', is' tho ■ ago that is moving along, or the Latin tongue, or Sir Eobert Stout, or the lino'.typo, or the-Oamaru sub-editor— V ' (j In an.article in an Oamaru,paper, SirEobert Stout rays: "I can romembor when, in Duncdiu,' only oib person . , smoked cigarottes.'"i One is tempted to , . discourse U[>on this in-tho-language ■of tho poet '.Burnihs j'i biitV ttt.i heroism of tho. man whom'Sir.Eobert Stbut remem- . pers, wrfh.Jal- liorror: 'anybody' can' imagine -the heroism, of this person, tho 'indescribable heroism—.; "What hero, myi old!" in fact,-as Hippolyte lrould say,-if he were not..talking .about girls. Bnt -lot foreigners and others retire for a moment: ' " , There are who praise Horatius, • - Thero are who. Alfred praise, "r others.in'.those spacious, '■ Divine, immoptal days: Tho man who ato the oyptcr firat. ™ man who made the Polar burst, Tho man tho Roman sho-wolf nursed— But not for • thorn MY buys, ■ Of ooutso, I'm not disdaining To recognise his ciit v. ■;» Who started aeroplaning And made an instant hit, 1 Or his who first put trovers on; But-all those pioneers long gone, Enrollod in ItyneV? bright lexicon. Don't stir ,my blood a bit. 'Tis t-o .unnamed person— . M'Phoe, M'Nish, M'Rae, • or M'Phersonr.l vrrito ray' littlo ,lay, . Who smokod-the only cigarette ' In old Dunedin, -danfc and wet, Indifferent to the 'glares ho met. Heedless of Stout, O.J.