THE CHANGING SCENE.

Dominion, Volume 5, Issue 1528, 26 August 1912, Page 6

THE CHANGING SCENE.

!■/''. A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW- ; [Bym.c.k.] <let us be philosophers," said the intelligent foreigner. "How we are shadows, say the poet, and how wo pursue phantoms. Regard Mulai Hafid, my old I The ; only monarch who has achieved felicity, by ceasing to be a monarch. He is symbol. Arrived at Marseilles, ho visit the music-hall, and he astonish himself! 'By blue,' ho exclaim, 'was this here i always while I was fighting for my crown? Why did one not inform mo?' Ho throws coins at the assistants. Ho samples the cocktail, ,and demand, 'Has one just invented this, then? I have left f my Kingdom at the just moment.' One informs him the. cocktail has been in Marseilles sine© forty years, and he groans. 'Oh, how I have wasted time.' His eyes grow large and astonished. He rides in the fiacre, he buys an auto, he speaks in the telephone, he sees life! They tell him tho pretender is making '• great progress. 'Ha ha/ ho say, 'what .'fool! I am free, and he fights in order to bear tho chains. How it is droll, 'death blue! Another cocktail.^!'" "Ho certainly is well out of it," said tho native. "But-tho other rulers, do they not see? Sir Roosevelt grows thin in the -endear . vour. to escape into slavery. Tho. Emperors and Kings hug their chains, instead of joining Mulai Hafid. vSuch is the life, my old! One fights to be tho dog on top; one succeeds; and one finds one

is a 6lave. No moro good times, no more merry days, for'the conquering. To be deposed, this is to be lucky. Bo content, my old! By blue! I just remember! Good-bye, dear mister." ; "Where are you going?" asked the native, i "I go see Sir Bart. One says he is sad. I will tell him-of Mulai Hand, and I shall buck him up. He docs not yet know how happy he is. Wo shall go together, Sir Bart and I,: to the- pantomime and sit in the circle family eating psanuts. We shall drink beer, and mako ; noises at the football match, and we shall tough at the pretenders Sir Ricketty, Sir Uncle Colvill, Sir Wilford. Let them pretend! Sir Bart and I will be gay. I 'Adieu!"' i Mr. Isitt asked what need wag there to put into his mouth words he had never uttered. He had said the Government was-begotten by slander, but he had made no reference to anybody. . , . When my statement is twisted into a' reference to some action of members of the Cabinet An hon. member: What else is it? Mr. Isitt declared that; he had made & statement which the Speaker had declaredwas un-Parliamcntary, and which he had immediately witMrawn-that tho. Minis--i : try to born in dishonour. That, too, was twisted into a reference to some ac- ' tion on the part of some members of the Ministry. Thero was no such idea in his mind. . . Mr. Mander had told him : . privately that he had referred to four mombers of the Government, and he (Mr. Isitt) had explained that he had meant nothing of the sort. Yet in his absence ! Mr. Mander had repeated the statement. Mr. Mander: But I heard you mention , Mr.' Buchanan by name. '•" -' Mr. Isitt explained that he mentioned Mr. Buchanan only as a shareholder in' The Dominion'. I'm a pore but honest female, w'ich I risc 3 to resent ' ' Them nasty twistin' persons in the 'Ouse of Parliament. When darlin' Mister Isitt gives the slanderers a smack. '•-- They'll twist 'is words most shameful, and they'll answer of 'im back, And they'll ask 'im for to name 'em, But 'e rises up to shame 'em fly- replyin' as he didn't, but it's all the same a. fac' I 'Ow 'is- gentle soul must suffer when 'e darsen't up and sajr As the Guv'mcnt's dead to honour (w'ich the same' is clear as day), Without some pusson risin' and appealin' to the Ohair! 'Ow 'is noble 'eart is 'arrered as 'e rises to declare As 'o never mentioned no one! Oh! that Speaker 'e's a low one To allow sich interruntin' of the only good man there. v When 'e.upß and says the.-Ministry Is Blanderers, they complain, they say as 'e's attaokin' of the Ministry again. They 'ate to see 'im liftin' up the tone of Parliament, H- Bo when 'e calls 'em tainted swine, the low things growl dissent. But 'e lifts tho tono asain When 'o rises to explain' ; As 'e never named no names to show the ■ actual ones 'e meant. "Ow Parliament would profit, and 'ow pleasant it would bo If they'd only sit and listen while 'is fancy jrandared free! i . They take 'im up so literal,' and they called 'is langwitch low When 'e only said as Jlaascy was corruo' from top to toe, And willingly irithdrcw it When the Speakor made 'Im do it. - It's reely most 'oart-breakin' fer to treat a good man so. I'm a pore but honest female, who as hoft, in self-defence, •'Ad to speak me mind with vigour at the ■- - ' cat across tho fence , | (W'ich 'er name is Mrs. Waggles), so it's nateral for me To sympathise most 'carty with that' great and good M.l'. And it makes mo anger glow When they interrup's the flow Of 'is langwitch, fer I get some tellin' (shots from it, you see. "I must be a rcv'lution'ry, Jawn," sa.id Mr. Dooley. "Either a rev'lution'ry or a wurrld-weary modheren, as Hogan says. It seems that some iv th' congregation that listened t'. Mr. Norrth's sermon on th' noxious racehorse wuz surprised, 'fiome iv ye,' he says, 'may suppose that this subjec' is romote fr'm th' intherests iv th' House iv Prayer,' says ho. 'They must have been non-churchgoers." "Well, it did surprise me," said lfj\

Hennessy. "Thin y'ought f 6tart attenclin' th' churches.' 'Whin I wuz younger, 'twud have give me a shock if th' preacher had ethrayed off th J rails an'.begun his serrmou bo sayin', 'Brethren, my discoorso to--1 day will be clauses four t' five an' a quarther iv th' Lan' f'r Settlements Ac'. r But we havo progressed, an' now'days th' only thrill I can get at Churrch is whin some darin' sensationalist preaches wan iv th' ouM serrmons on th' ould subjec's, an' empties th' churrch . in five minutes. Some iv them overdo it. Wan Sunday iv late the clerrgyman in wan iv th' most notorious churches -irint th' full len'th iv actually preachin' on a tex' fr'm th' Bible, an' th' anjienco sat pale an' thundersthruck, an' in perfect silence. They never give wan han'-clap, an' there wuz some hissin', an' aftherwards th' aujience held a meetin' an' called on' th' ministher V resign, as a dangerous innovator. Iv coorse, such bad cases is rare. It must be tryin' f th' modheren congregation not f be sure that th' clerrgyman will dale with th' subjects fit f'r churches. Whin th' avcraga man goes f church he expeo's f hear Mr. Norrth stick t' his orthodox business an' hand out hot wans t' th' Innematograph or give th' inside tale-fv th' Gran' National Hurrdles, or th' latest wurrk iv th' higher critics in th' boxin' wurrld. He doesn't want his sense iv fitness upset be onexpectcd references f th' Bible. He wants !•' bear th' latest contribution., if. iW :tll<sr.Y.-' i?, &'• M^Z

punch. There wuz a time whin I read th J ' 'Eef'ree' f'r I'h' sporrtiu' news, but now'days I put on \mo hat an' go t' cliurrch. Eeligion, yo say ? Well, Jawii, if ye haven't found out that religion means opposition t' boxin' an* th J turrf, it's time ye wis? attended to be a mission."