THE CHANGING SCENE

Dominion, Volume 5, Issue 1425, 27 April 1912, Page 6

THE CHANGING SCENE

A BIRD'S-EYE -VIEW[Br M.C.K.] The Wnrdist' was beaming. "Hooray," exclaimed the intelligent foreigner sympathetically. "My old. you have the ailgay! It rejoice me!" "I want to talk to you," chuckled the Wardist, pulling a wad of newspaper cuttings out c-f Jiia pocket. "Listen tu this: 'We want to get away from trifle 4 and tipsy cake, ami get biiek to solid bread anil butter." What do you think of that—how's that for politics?""But Hint is horrible/' cried the intelligent foreigner. "Tho dog! How it is to deplore, this vile slander, this—what say, Sir Barber? Ah, ves, this insinuendo. How it drives public men from Ministerial houses! This Massey! Trifles, ho say? Tipsy cake? Shall 110 person arrest a so abominablo dofainer of progress?" "Oil, it wasn't Massey. Tom Mackenzie said that. And listen. Ho also said " "lint name of a pipe!. I not comprehend. Sir Mackenzie is Prima Minister, more Liberal of all. But you mock yourself of me? No? My old, what does this mean?" "Tom said it all right, and good Liberal doctrino it is, too. Listen: 'We shall concentrate on administration. Tho country needs better administration, and less legislation.' Tom's the boy—take my word, Hippolyte, he has galvanised Liberalism into new life." "But what it is, this Liberalism? 1 know pragmatism, I know hypnotismsubjects of tlio most difficult. Hut I feel myself uncertain of this Liberalism. Tom Fay of Liberalism these vile things I read angrily in Tire Dominion". How, then, is he Liberal? Was ho not in the kitchen wliero they made the tipsy cake? But certainly, noiy to believe him? Last year ho assures all tho world that tho Government is perfect." "Well, the fact is, Hippolyte, you have to be practical. You must move with the times—progress, change, my lad. And Liberalism must adapt itself to the needs of the day. Of course, Massey and tho rest were liar-j when they said all those things. But things have altered. Ward was a grand statesman, but, after all, you know—well, lie's left. There's been too much legislation, as Tom says, and too much bad administration. Liberalism consists " ".My old, it Consists in, I know what. It is the policy of whatever suits. Attend ! It is the policy of somersault. It is tho policy of bolting into cover, into holes. Tho courage of the rabbit! Anything, anything, to save the bacon. Tho true Liberal, is he ono who is willing to say he is a regue, to say anything, to i escape the boot of circumstance? Bless it j all, my old, this Liberalism! I begin almost not to love it." I

Speaking in Invercargill on tho eve of his visit to Australia, Sir Joseph Ward declared that, while away, he would not speak on politics, excepting "what he might say on the spur of the moment." "At il p.m. Sir Joseph Ward roso in response to insistent calls. 'On the spur of the moment, gentlemen,' said the llight Honourable Baronet, 'on. the spur of the moment, which I insist, as I have always insisted, and I have no hesitation in saying, and it is on record, that on the spur of the moment I am unable' to oiler those observations which in my position, and I am fully awaro of the responsibility of my position, since no man can for twenty years, conduct; and conduct in' the face of a perpetual torrent of vile abuse and/slander—iu these circumstances I am hardly able to say, on the spur of the moment, what; I would liko to say, and I repeat it.' (Loud applause and cries of "Go on!") " 'Well, gentlemen,' went on the Tight honourable baronet, 'on the spur of the moment, without premeditating, and entirely without notes, and in a spirit of friendliness and goodwill, since I am relieved to be without responsibility, on the spur of the moment, and it is putting m« in an embarrassing position to require mo to spealc without notes, and after this excellent dinner. I repeat that it is difficult to do full justice to the situation, but on tho spur of the moment, as I have said, and it is on record that I have said it, and I defy Mr. Massey to deny, that the vilo slanders of the Opposition have lowered the tone of public life, and I decided to resign in order to escape the unpleasaait and disgusting abuse to which public men are subjected in the interests of the public as a whole. Now, one word as to the situation that was created by tho action of the low and scurrilous hirelings, and I speak with full knowledge, and I will take action against them. 1 have no intention, gentlemen, of spoiling my holiday by even thinking, much less speaking, of tho venomous and vindictive Opposition, and so I shall merely deal briefly on tho spur of the moment with the general methods pursued by Mr. Massey.'"

Tho morning newspaper reports conclude "here, with this observation that "the right honourable baronet was speaking when we went to press." Nflw that the footballers hav» begnn, .0110. inclines to think kindly of tho cricketers, and, thinking of cricketers, one thinks quite (/nickly of the Rev. E. 0. Blamires. . It is a great pity that Mr. Blamires is not a politician. During the week he had something to say about men who will not give up their seats to women in the tramcars, and a worker promptly disagreed with the opinion he expressed. Mr. Blamires foolishly replied with some remarks about chivalry. The poor chap has evidently not been following the course of tho Labour movement. Chivalry, indeed! Docs he not know—but let the worker talk to Mr. Blamires for himself Chivalry, Ifr. Blamires? W'ich I ups and respectful inquires Do you think as it's that Wot the foemen of Fat, We, us, tho true workers requires? YTot's chivalry, Mr. Blamires? A dodge of the 'iTelings an' liars 'Oo would bind us in chains; W'ich we flmply disdains All them, lures of vile Mamminjr, Blamires. Ton shorely are dreamin', Blamires: Ter stand up fer weemin, Blamires! Tor give up yer seat . An' ter stand on yer feet!!! Not fer workers, I tell yer, Blamires. Prehaps it's a thing yon admires, This chivalry bunkum, Illamires, Hut us workers refuse Ter lick anyone's shoes: Wo simply sits tight on' aspires. 'Ere's a tip fer yer, Mr. Blamires: Leave that chat ter tho 'lrelingß an' llarB; No worker yeeld3 place To the Mildredß or Hays Or tho Mollies or Hands or MurMi, Tho ■workers, dear Mr. Blamrnw, Ib st«uiy an' solid defleri Of 'oary tradition! A slttln' position la wot tho true workers roanires.

Scottish caution is a terrible tiling in politics. Nobody over expected much would be Furthcoming from a Prime Minister named Mackenzie, buf « Jew of us had hoped that by wny of celebrating his sudden arrival, at the end of his wonderful Compound Somersault act, on the soft cushion of J23500 a year, Mr. Mackenzie might havo "banged" at least saxpence. But he 0005 not mean to ."fcang"- mow than » Ixwboo, tjoliticallj?

speaking. Ho has merely undertaken "to appoint a commission to see that the, cost of living is not unduly raised." This is really very stingy statesmanship. H will only cost Mr. Mackenzie a stroke of the pen to remove tile other big troubles that oppress us, but his canny Seoltishness paralyses his hand. One may be grateful to him for thus deciding that nobody will ever be worried any more by (lie price of things. Hut while he was about it, he might'have decided to gazette regulations abolishing: (!) The force of gravitation, which is respon-ible for the rain falling downwards instead of upward-:, as in a well-regulated place it might to fall; (2) the habit of requiring work to be pel formed in return for wages; (.1) icebergs, which wreck ships; f-li the City Council's tramway timetable, which causes great distre-s b.v making people miss trams; ('.">) the hen'habit of laying only one egg at a time, which makes eggs scarce, dear, and bad; (G) the persistence with which winter keeps on coming (X.1!., winter has come every year without exception for at least 18!) years). But Mr. Mackenzie is Scottish. He cannot bear to "bang" more than twopence at a time. His thrifty spirit shrinks from doing more than abolishing poverty and making living cheap and easy for everyone. If it is the cost of printing the regulations that is worrying him, we shall open a subscription list to raise the necessary 'Js. (id. j for the gazetting of the edicts suggested.