HASHIMURA TOGO.

Dominion, Volume 5, Issue 1413, 13 April 1912, Page 11

HASHIMURA TOGO.

THE DOMESTIC SCIENTIST, (By Wallace Irwin, in "Good Housekeeping.") To the editor , of "Good Housekeeping Magazine," who desires to make high life less costly; Dear Mr — Please address all letters to Fine-' heiraer Employment , Bureau, where I am looking for it as usual. Sorrow for me. Sometimes I think I am like a 1 shot-gun, merely made, to bo fired. ; When last seen I was employed at home of - Mrs. Ethel M'Manus, who reside with , her husband, Mr. Ethel M'Manus, at'' Honeyville-on-the-Hudson. They are a very matrimonial couple of people. They were married only a short fame of • jore. Therefor© they are living in the midst of wedding presents, which they are trying to use as furniture. How superfluous! 'Togo,'" says this-lady to me, "I hire you because we are too poor to live without a servant." ■ "How smart idea!"'l report.with chivalry; "Jcs," she roparteo., "I learn this wisf??, v from, nowspapor:. 'A good' servant TnU aiye Hon. Housekeeper 6dol. a week. 1 Acting'; on-this , advice I hire you for " l 'ol. ..a week, w'hich make following arithmetics 6d01.—5d01. equal Idol. Theroforo I have oleaned up Idol, a week by transaction,"^ "If ; you kep 20 servants at that rate you could save sifficient to ■ keep ottomobilo?," I pronounce, joyfully.' "I have oftenly : thought of that," say this bridisli' lady 1 "But-1' think I shall begin gradually on 1 servant' and . see how much; I save." • •• '"I "permit you to retain all vou make off me,"'l suggest for generosity. /Your duties," she utter, "is to high cost of .living: as low-down as pos: Bible. I expect you to buy food for our home," and ,to purchase it 'with such financial cutcness that everything will cost less than formerly.' When lion. Beefsteak cost 28c. per lb. I expect you to chide him until be, become more reasonable. -Hon, Chicken must walk down from ■ his 37c. perch if ha wish to join us;, at..our. table'. Potatus, string-bean, butter and salad must also net less haughty, in their, prices if they wish to associate with us on bill-of-fare. Could you manage this for our .household ?" "Japanese are great diplomatists," I report. ,"I am willing to approach the problem with intense stinginess." "The dutiosof a servant," repeat Mrs. M'Manus: with expression of old-ago pe- . euliar to brides, "the duties of a servant is; to come into more affectionate contact with butcher, baker, and icer. Thus tradesmen might be coaxed into sharing •with Housekeeper that profits which they now selfishly keep in their business. You will arrange this." "I am willing' to promise anything," I collaborate. 1 "Each morning after dish-wash ceremony is over &' Hon. Furnace is fed for the day, you must promenade with basket to market,' where High Cost of Living reHides. It is useless for you to squander 1! dollars here & there in reckless provisions.. 'I. read in newspaper this morning how one delicious and nourishing lunch for 3 persons might be, bought for 50c., including cost of>gns to cook it with. I shall try it to-day. My, Hon. Aunt . Augusta are expected here at noon. ' I require you to make miracnlous mea! for her. Here is 50c. Take it and be economical." . . "I could not be extravagant under those Circumstances,"' I renig, compressing -the j dollar to my pocket. . "Be as hasty as possible," she beseech when I depart. ' "It. should take no time to make 50c. go a long ways," .1 encourage. "I shall *&unter among markets-making storekeep-ers-jealous by my. independent behaviour. Then I shall promenade homewards, and com'mtnce to cook," 1 I. do so, and this is what I done. I' spent sc. trolley fare, and arrive to «hop of Hon. Fritz Schultz, ■prominent butchery. I discover this wealthy meatperson standing befront of his-store making sweet whistles. "O HonxMr. Sir/'-'l'lcommchce, "your Boul feels very -musical this'morning?'' "X> butcher's soul is like his sausage," he coflfab, "full of strange and wonderful •urprises. • Also I must feel'slightly poetical- because- Spring have arrived to my store." ... "Spring," I snagger. "Ah, yes," he say off. "Beholt the signs' pf _ Spring in; my window." I notice several. One say: "SPRING LAMB!—Marked Up to 42c." Another say, "SPRING CHICKEN-Formerly 18c. Reduced to 27c." "Why should meat behave so heavenly?" I reproach. "It is continually Boating beyond." • "The; Trusts—they are greedy about making' profits,"- he say, arranging his necktie,-which was full of diamond: pins "The Trusts are: to blame, ...as usual What can I sell you this morning? 1 shall be willing to part from some deli cioiis pork chops for'tw'ice that they ari worth." "At such a price pork should taste lik»> venison," I suggested;,'••••• "Have you got anv'food-for.sale that i» less ostentatious?" I.acquit. "Corn beef," he report; . "That homely dish can be obtained'for 22c. per'lb"' ' "I.shall take lib. please," I order. /'(lmpossible!" he disorder. "My corn 1 beef como' only' in 51b. patterns." . My soul drop back, completely dabbed. ■ "Ain't you got . nothing that I-can'buy ; for 15c.?" I gosp. "How,you insult me!" he gollup, wip- 1 in'g meat-axe with rage. So'l depart off before chop occur. It was now, 11.30 by. clock-time .and .T. : had not yet obtained that 50c.' lunch. I spent sc. more trolley fare arriving at Nusbaum's Butchery,., This . leave me ' 40c. .with which, to do so with., "What,you got for 15c. which is sifficient to retain 3 persons, mostly ladies?" I ask from Hon. Nusbaum. He look to me with fatty eyebrows. . "I can give you 3 nice mutton bones for that price of money," he report. "Can food be made from mutton bones?" I ask it. "If nroperly prepared," he renig, "they are delicious. _.. First .they should be boiled for 4 days in extract of beef, .then stuffed- with ■ chicken giblets, olives, muskTooms, raisons, and 12 fresh eggs chopped finely.. .The. cost .of this dish are,as fol- . lows: 'Bones 15c. . ' Chicken giblets 1.50 •• Muskrooms , 75 Eggs' 65 ; Baisons 20 j Total extravagance 3.25d01." < "You. call this cheap dish?" I holla ; uervoly. ' ' ' "You- would be surprised to see how cheap it tastes!" he suggest, while I walk ■ away from that conversation. I stand'with my'4oc.. remainder-on side- i walk, and wonder,what next. Ah! Voge- ' table lunch is most delicate for invalids i and; ftilb of economy. Therefore .1 shall ; go to place of Hon. Cyrus Goldthwaite, 1 groceries and vegetables. I arrive there by trolley, which cost 10c. because.l lost < my transfer. This subtract me down to < 30c, • 'TVhat wish ?" require Cyrus Goldth- i Waif", with spectacles. ' . "How much 3 potatus cost?" I nego- : tiflte. I wa.s sure those' vegetable would be nourishing, bacaus" Irish cats them : and remains quite warlike. "They come in all sizes," suggest Hon. Goldthwaite. "Give them to me' about ladies' size," I snrfest; b"causo I knew they was for a ladies' lunch. • Hon. Goldthwaite'hand forth 3 gentlelooking potatus. •

"23c.," ha Tcquire. "0 Hon. Groceries!" I object. "Ladies cannot live on potatus alone. I got 80c. with which to obtain lunch for 3. From this I must extract sc. for trolley hometrip. What bill-of-fare can I purchase for 25c. remainder?" ' "Sardines," ho say, "are nourishing, but they tastes lonesome without crackers. These rare fishes cost 20c. per box and sufficient crackers to chaperonß them would cost 7c. This would leave bonus of 3c. for salt. Or if you would think it more delicate you might obtain Jib. cheese at 18c. and 1 potatus at 7c/' "I am completely puzzled by this arithmetic," he said, "Maybe I should telephone to Mrs. M'Manus and find whatis," I say so. So I do so. "Hullo!" "Yes." "This is Togo." "0!" Chillbite voice. "I wish to-ask, please, what you would prefer as nourishment? Would 2 potatus and ohe box crackers, seem, more sifficient than Jib. cheese and 1 potatus?" "For which moal, please?" she snib. "For lunch, please," I expose. , '"Togo!" holla blond voice from telephoney "as it is now 1.45 in P.M. and my guest has already went elsewhercs in search for food, I can see no sensible ratio in your horseless remarks. How dare you show, your face at my telephone under such condition?." "Be more calm to m 0,".1 beseech. "You sent me forth with 50c. to save money from food. 1 done so. If your guest went away without lunch, she saved you that mucli. Which wore very economical. When you substract'_2sc. from my travelling expenses, you will still have 25c. for profits on the Thusly I save you from • your luxuries." "You- are talking a vacuum,' she stronglc. "There is one luxury you shall savo me from in future." "Which luxury is that, please?" I deploy. "You!" she snagger abruptly. Bang-up for 'telephone. Hon. Goldthwaite charge me 10c. for that telephone.' Which show that high price of talking'is also increasing rapidly upward. With my remaining wealth I advance hopefully forwards towards Finehoimer Employment Bureau, where I am always welcomed. Hoping you are the same, Yours truly, HASHIMURA TOGO.

ETIQUETTE OF TIPS,

The London, correspondent of the Sydney "Daily Telegraph" has an interesting and.amusing article on'that bane of colonial visitors to England—the tinning system. It really looks as if every colonial visitor should be armed with a booklet giving advice on the subject. It would save a lot of trouble, and; in some cases, a good deal of money. The average visitor begins by giving too much, his minimum being sixpence for any service rendered to him. This, we are told, is too much. It stamps the giver as a spendthrift in the eyes of his'social equals, and as a parvenu in those of the person tipped.

_ The base of the tipping system at Home is twopence. For some things the recognised payment is a penny.. For instance, the man who opens your taxi-cab door (and he is 'encouraged- by the driver) expects only a penny, and generally gets it; but in most cases it takes twopence to satisfy the recipient and preserve the giver's sslf-i'espect. The system of restaurant , tipping is curious. 'In many of the 'fashionable restaurants in the Strand and tho West End there are three persons to be tipped. Thers is the waiter'when ho brings the change after payment for the meal, and ho regards himself as entitled to sixnence,. but he will take less "without making a. public outcry over the matter." The man who cuts, the meat from the joint has also to be tipped, though he is frequently overlooked by visitors who are not familiar with the system. In the best class restaurants, the joints 'are wheeled round on little table,*, and the man who wheels expects a gratuity, Lastly, there, is the who looks after the diner's hat and coat. There is also the man who opens the swin*. doors for the patron" to pass in and out, but. he is net on ,the regular roster; it is doubtful whether ho is entitled to.be paid, so, of course, j pood many people do not do it. The ordinary charge for hair-cutting is 4d., but the customer is expected to give; 2d. to the barber, so the cost of the business is the same as it is in New Zealand. If p. visitor stands at a street corner to take his bearings a man will offer his services as guide, and the fixed charge for this service is twopence. An amusing account is given of the experience of a democratic- Australian who set out' from his hotel to a railwav station close by, carrying his bap. He refused the offer. of ■ the hall porter to set him a cab, thereby sinking immeasurably 111 the man's estimation, nnd as soon as bo rot outside he wa-s importuned bv several loafers, who were distressed at seeing n gentleman carrying his own bar:. These men would nol accept his refusal of their services, and they followed him down the street, their number being added to n.V the nrocessiqn moved along. At lost the position was so embarrassing thnt the Australian jumped into a cab and drove to tho station. Having tipped the driver and a lio ,was permitted to take his seat in the train-

SUPERFLUOUS HA II?

Superfluous liair destroyed by "Rusma* (rep.). A guarantee (liven with each case undertaken. See testimonials and letters. Mrs. Hnllen (over Economic), Lambtoii Quay. '.Phone 1047. (Testimonial.) Clyde Quay, Wellington. Dear Mrs. Huileii,—l write to lei vou know hoiv delighted I am with your iiev preparation "I'iimiih." Alter a real good trial it is taking splendid effect and my disfigurement is fast becoming obliterated, Enclosed please find 4:1 .;ls, (id., jneiwiiiiK the cost of skin food lis well. Original copy of abuvt can be seen nt nir addremu ?