THE NEW FRANKENSTEIN

Dominion, Volume 3, Issue 670, 22 November 1909, Page 8

THE NEW FRANKENSTEIN

;.V, MINISTERS AND THEIR MASTERS. DEPUTATIONS'AND THEIR WATS. : " The : most famous of deputations, and, in essential points, typical of them all, is.that oi the offended village choir, which waited upon "Pa'son Mayple" in Thomas Hardy's pastoral tale, "Under tho Greenwood Tree." The parson, with his now-f angled notions, had resolved to introduco .that "miserable machine," an organ, into the villago services, and tho old players of fiddles and "clar'nots" waited upon him to protest against tho supplanting of their melody. "As to going -to see the pa'son," explained Thomas Leaf, "one of ns might just call and ask en■.his maning, and 'twould bo just as well done; but it will add a bit of a flourish., to tho cause if the quire waits on him as a body. Then tho great thing to mind is, not for any of our fellers to bo nervous." After consuming each a rasher of bacon, a pint of cider; a drop of mead, and a bit of ginger as a preventive- against nervousness, the bashful rustics put their, case to the vicar, and went away half satisfied with a compromise. • : "Waiting On" Deputations. . Deputations in .this country threaten to become : a chief part of■the art of government. They ( all believe,, as did.the honest villager, that 'a .bit of a.flourish" is added to tho cause by going to a minister.in the largest possible body., ihey • are:nearly always met with, compromises, but they are no longer v> nervous. When the first deputation from, Lone Valley i waited; upon Mr. Seddon, who, fpr good reasons Lofjiis own, first encouraged the habit of deputations; the Minister doubtless loomed before them as a tremendous personage, terrible in attributes and . power.': They preferred their requests as meekly as, at the crucial time, , did Hardy's rustics, but as' Ministers have since become familiar to successive droves of deputations, their stature has continually shrunken, and to-day the depatationist knows who is I mas "L r : Inere are notf-many days in the year on which a Minister is not being waited upon by a.deputation somewhere. Air through the Parliamentary recess -Ministers spend fivesixths; of their time travelling through the ength and breadth of the Dominion, and being, met by deputations.at every hamlet. All hrough the Parliamentary session, deputations from every corner of New Zealand come streaming down-to- Wellington--to wait on Ministers. In fact, when the session is in irogress, ,the customary, language- in reran] O; this.,prncedure should.bo* altered. 'It ia Ministers, in a more actual sense, who very often wait on .deputations: N A. deputation, from' he backblocks desired - recently to see the : ion. K.. M'Kenzio at 11.30 a.m. Mr. ,M kenzie was not -available-'at that hour- it ; was proposed oh his behalf to postpone tho interview., until, the, afternoon.'■ The - arranßc.ment was provisionally accepted,-, but after all n a democratic, country -where every deputa- ■ tioniet- represents an unknown number of' .votos^ varying with-his age, influence, and" the-, numberof. his. family :and: descendants, whv shooldslimsters.be waited for? The member ot.Parliament who was to introduce the'denuation;sot out, with-this small visible' and' arge invisible army at his back, to find the Minister for Public Works, wherever'he might 'V^- by J 2,3 , 0 had ' nie 'apnorically speakiig, S \r- ba6k ? ■ t n» m Pn- The deputation ? / g i-l 'A? 11 " , oase M f( > r ' fte .next two hours, and f the Minister thought regretfully of his lost luncheon, he behaved with all the amiability of a man who does not, need to eat. But ■Ministers have, ] during, the , present session', given up not only, their lunoheohs,' but their dinners to deputations.- It is conceivable - in such oircumstances' that .; as the Ministerial eye, with' : a pleased expression, -ranges over thte unconscious'faces of the ruthless invaders,; and the Ministerial eaT listens,, between their, endless iteration,, for , tho bell which will resummon Parliament. at half past seven, tho uinistenal mind finds comfort in computing how many children and grandchildren'of vot-t 'ing age, under what'epell of authority, may attach to , : this" and'-that "older -member of the deputation. -'.--■'■'. , -.'■ ; ; ; ' ( . . ■'•■■'.' .■ ' .Sudden and Untimely Invasions. It is-a maxim of the deputationist, not only that a flourish is added to the cause,by attending in large numbers, .but that a good story is never spoiled'by repetition, arid each member, who , miist hand 'in,a large voucher, or his travelling expenses', to the Lone Valley local body, recognises that a few lines in irint, showing his' own useful contribution to. .the argument, are*desirable .as a-proof <of. services rendered. Therefore,'in the case of' deputations from a , distanco, it is usual for as many members "as''possible to .speak, and tho argument _ is: driven , home with. patient ■ repetition. ..'lt is the rarest' thing f or. a, Minister. to ■ interrupt, or try.td cut,6hort the The Prime Minister has been known ,to do so, with.the knowledge of "several other deputations waiting, in; tho . passage. But the' Prime Minister,'on the other hand, has come : down to the' House to meet a deputation at 9.20 a.m. on a Saturday morning,. after sitting . in the House till- 1 a.m. 'On' .this -occasion a member, of Parliament who was interested in the-deputation allowed , . Sir Joseph 1 Ward.ten minutes to be late, and consequently turned up -himself when.the depu'-' tation was'.ivell under way. .; ; .. ■ This session there havo been as many as five public deputations to Ministers in one day, and the number' of private deputations—those to which the press 1 is 'not inunmorable. A. Minister who, several weeks ago, had received only one public deputation -hat then received no fewer than, forty of a private nature. .There is not much formality about deputations..' They descend on Ministers as \suddenly as the rain from heaven. - A member vof Phrliam'ent looks in'the ;door,""Can I. see the Minister for .five minutest' 'Tes, certainly,, come in'."--The member of Parliament goes out instead, beckons to'half a dozen men who are waiting round the. corner of the passage, and the deputation is "introduced." Of course, formal appointments are of tell , made, but they are' not considered necessary. No Minister .will refuso to see a deputation about a. pillar-box. Occasionally the.se, visits are 'so .inconsequent that the doputationists, when they l are' within the prosence, find that they have different opinions as to what they caino fox, or at.least as to the circumstances which necessitate their requests The Hon.- R. M'Kenzie,quite the most choloric, downright, and plainsppken' member of the '. Ministry, .has ...been known to listen with every appearance, of good nature while two members of a deputation contradicted each other, in his luncheon hour, as' to why they, wanted something.-..-. ; ~ A Dreadful Frankenstein. * , ■ . When Mr. Seddon started tho system of constant deputations he did not-know what sort of Frankenstein he' was creating. -Ho only know that it was pleasant, and must obviously t prcivo useful to civo every member of the meanest local body tne opportunity, to say, with joy and pride, that Ke had .shaken' hands Vrith "Dick."., But : if Mr. ISeddon had: had: to .welcome the fifth deputation on the timber trouble,following the supposed solution of a Eoyal Commission, his voico.would probably have been awful in its menace. • Sir Joseph Ward can say, "I am pleased to ■ meet you, gontlemen,"as if he really meantit; The argument, which nuggests a,very largo deputation;tor preference is not .always easy. to, follow. ■ For instance, vrhen a deputation waited on Sir Joseph recently to ask for Dominion option, the protection'from liquor of the Natives in , the. King Country, the , abolition of the locker sj'stem, and: other:alterations of- the law, it was-obvi-ous that, whbther they are desirable or undesirable,tweuty thousand voters, to- put the figure moderately, could probably have been found to support these requests. Now, a deputation of twenty thousand was:not, practicable, -but somebow it.was felt.ithat of forty was still more impressive than would have : been one of six. There is something curious in this reasoning. ■-. .-•' -.:.-■ •" :.

It is obvious why'the'deputation from a distance should wish to choose its own time, not the Minister's, for.an'interview. , ''Che deputation from the Bluff or Auckland—travelling at the expense of some local body, that is, on the. ratepayers' nionpy—which gets to Wellington, on a Friday, finishes,its business with tho Minister on SnJvday morning, and, starts back on Monday or Tuesday, can enjoy 'itself con-' sidcrably if,the weather is Bne. And when.the Minister's promise, delightful to the local body, does not materialise in a hurry, it is natural that tho deputation should return. if possible, or that unothor deputation,: jealous of their fellows' good fortune, should com o to see what they, can effect. It is natural that the'deputations should ho as "representative" as possible. One deputation from a distant coritro spent a very pleasant week-end in ■Wellington presumably at the expense of,-. charitable aid funds. They may not h'av.o charßcdtheir holiday to the Charitable Aid Board on whose business they- ostensibly ijnme, 'but, it would -be ,, quite' in accordance with the practice if they did so. When so m'uoh.business is;done between Ministers and ratepayers direct by ineans of deputations, fliio wonders why members of Parliament are; elected, and paid, to represent tho people's noeds. ; The road '..board- business of Parliament, which, on the'eonfessiori of somo members, has become its largest function, might bb discharged by Ministers travelling x on continuous circuit or entertaining continuous deputations in the central city.., But the deputation system has one advantage • which endears it to members themselves. It gives an. opportunity for cross-examining a- Minister, and possibly dragging from him statements which would hardly !be elicited by correspondence. Tiot ie what the member.hopsa for; it is the

business of the Minister, on the other hand, to. make an infinite deal of cordiality and good intentions counter-balance one half-penny-worth of commitment. Tho Nation' Builders. There is one other respect in which the systora of deputations may havo value. It brings tho country into contact with the town, and tho'town cannot help being impressed. There have been deputations-.this session.from the Kawhia backblocks, where horses aro buried in the miry roads, and from, the remote district north of Auckland. Occasionally these strangers to the city aro. conspicuous by their gum-boots, curious to bo seen on paved streets 0 ,, in, the Parliamentary lobbies, but eloquent of the conditions of their daily life. They, are moro given to boards than' city men. But a Very little, contact'.with'them argues that there are no " countrymen" iu New Zealand, in the. sense in which tho word is used in older , countries. The speech and manners of these men are in no way rustic. The likeness of their deputations to, that which waited on the Wessex vicar is ended here. Men' who cannot profit by Bociety or , a.public,library— cannot even reach a railway train in winter because their roads are muddy . address a Minister for the first time with vigour, confidence, and often natural eloquence, as . they], describe* tho courage , of their moatimprisoned women, or, the hopes delayed which have made themselves "heart-weary." They may call tho Minister." honoured sir"—one of them did of late—but it is well that Ministers should still be honoured somewhere—and these',ore upstanding, self-reliant, manly men, whose whole. bearing expresses that'they dp not ask for itnoTe- thai their deferred due.. One of. them affirmed,, with.a; little jiride,. that,he had been all tho time pioneering' for sixty years. Men.have had monuments ,erected to them who have.served, the State to less "effect, and at less cost, than thai. / , '■'. '."■,-'