RIGHTS AND WRONGS IN THE FAMILY.

Dominion, Volume 1, Issue 264, 31 July 1908, Page 5

RIGHTS AND WRONGS IN THE FAMILY.

■It ■ often hapens ■ (says ■ an American writer) that we are more widely separated from those' in our family:, than from tho veriest stranger we may mCct at an afternoon tea. -In ten minutes! conversation with such an one 1 we may find ourselves on the most ;intimate terms,"and are amazed and'startled ithat we. have gone-so far. The' sect that' believes iii reincarnation explains this peculiarity by saying that this acquaintance is an old tie revived. An acquaintance of a past incarnation met again in this one. •- It is a 'pleasant theory, and for some highly satisfactory.' Others claim that there is no such thin" as blood relationship save as a mere 'form! and • that only soul or spiritual relationship should'have any weight with thinking human. beings. . - ; ' the fact remains that the soul relationship in the family is too often the' "lost'essential of I harmony." , There is no doubt that the greatest strength in. any activity lies in'concentration of effort. .Family life as a whole actually typifies concentration of effort—tho. effort to build up a home— and if there aro disintegrating influences in parts of it these should either be adjusted or eliminated. There'is greater advancement in adjustment—greater display of intellectual and soul development—than in elimination. Adjustment is progress. Elimination, in; the abovo sense, is: confession of failure. 1

The family is practically a preparatory school for each boy and girl living it in. It is preparing them for home-making in the future, and the training, the ideals, and the happiness' tliev' find thero are all so. much knowledge-capital for them to draw upon for that'distant day when they .shall begin to build a home-life of their own with hearts and minds and high ideals of honour. I believe that if cach child wero trained to understand his small responsibilities as a homemaker that family' life would really be , a synonym. for. harmony. . . The child who,is quarrelsome, disobedient, selfish, should. be'made to understand that ho is : destroying the home that all the.oth.er. members of tho family are trying so hard to build up, and in nine cases out of ten ho will really try very hard to be classed among its builders. . Something a child dreads , very much is being left out or left behind. The fear arises from the horrors of ■ loneliness from which many a poor child suffers. . There are a number-,of little .points in the conduct of a , home that are ignored in most families to-day. One of them is this question of the consideration of "property rights" among children. More unhappiness and bitterness arises from this than'from almost any other cause. In dealing out mere justice to tho disputants the "nine points of the law" should be made to hold j*ood; but the lesson of "justice tempered with mercy" is even better. The owner of the article under discussion should be given prior rights naturally, and tho question settled without further argument. When this claim is established in tho protesting eyes of the plaintiff, the defendant should bo shown tho breadth and beauty of giving freely of what is one's own. .