The Pleasures of an Editor.

Cromwell Argus, Volume VI, Issue 289, 26 May 1875, Page 6

The Pleasures of an Editor.

Editing a paper is a very pleasant business. If it contains-too much political matter, people won't have it. If it contains too little, they won't have it. If the type is small, they can't read it. If we publish telegraph reports, folks say they are nothing but lies. If we omit them, they say we have no enterprise, or suppress them for political effect. If we have in a few jokes, folks say we are nothing but a rattle-head. It we don't admit jokes, they say we are an old fossil. If we publish original matter, they blame us or not giving them selections. If we publish selections, folks say that we are lazy for r.ot writing more and giving them what they have not read in any other paper. If we give a public man complimentary notices, we are censured for being partial. If we do not, all hands say we are an uncouth bear. If we insert an article which pleases the ladies, men become jealous. If we do not cater for their wishes, the paper is not fit to have in their houses. If we attend church, they say •it is only for effect. If we do not, they denounce us as deceitful and terribly wicked. If we remain in the office and attend to business, folks say we are too proud to mingle with our fellows. If we go out, they say we never attend to business. If we do not pay our bills promptly, folks say w T e are not to be trusted. If we do pay promptly, they say we stole the money.—American paper.

-■if w 'T t fig' r nrwTVimrTir>Tiqi i imiiii iiiwm m m iiwiiiiium i winmiii iiih The Sydney Evening Mail recently says: —"The man whose sudden demise we noted yesterday, but whose name we were unaMe to obtain at the time, was named Thomas Smith, a ! cabinetmaker by trade. He was well known on all new rushes as the proprietor of several places of amusement, which he always called the 'Shakspeare.' During the busy times on the early uishes in New Zealand, Snvth was a prosperous man, and owned a large property in Dunedin, and afterwards on the West Coast. He subsequently went to Fiji, and latterly has been in verv reduced circumstances." Hollowaifs Ointment and Pill?.— Diseases of Advanced Years.- When man lias passed to tho borders of old age, the digestion becomes impaired, the nervous system grows feeble, and the physical power shows increased weakness. Hence arise congestion of the liver, lungs, or head, followed by dropsy, asthma, or apoplexy, which too frequently afflict the aged. The liver usually first becomes torpid,but its activity may speedily be revived by rnbl ing Holloway's Ointment thoroughly over the pit of the stomach, and right side, at least twice a day, and taking the Pills at ' the same time. This treatment also cures all other congested organs, by varying the parts rubbed according to tlt« situation* of th* oongei' tion.