Mark Twain's Hotel.

Cromwell Argus, Volume V, Issue 228, 24 March 1874, Page 7

Mark Twain's Hotel.

Having lately opened a hashery, I send yon {these, my rules and regulations :—Tins house ', shall be considered strictly, inn-temperate. :None but the brave deserve the fare. Pi»r sons owing bills for board will be bored for bills. Boarders who do not wish to pay in advance are requested to advance and pay. Boarders arc expected to wait on the colored cook—for- meals. Sheets will be rightlv changed once in six months, or more if necessary'.' Double boarders can have two |-l*eds with a room in it, or two rooms-with a I bed in it, as they choose. Boarders are rei quested to'' pull oiF their boots before retiring Jif theytfan conveniently do so. Beds with jor without bugs. All moneys and other I valuables are to be left in care of the proprietor. Thjs is insisted on, as he will be responsible for no other losses. Inside matter will not be furnished for editors under ariy Consideratton. Relatives, coming to make a j six months' visit will be welcomed ;. but when they bring their household "furniture, virtue will cease to be a forbearance; 1 'Single men with their, families, wi 11 not be boarded. .Beds vwith or without boards. Dreams will be charged for by the dozen. Nightmares hired out at reasonable rates. Stone vaults will be furnished to snoring boavders, as the proprietor willrin novwi'se-be responsible hmc the broken tin-pannums of other ears.