"High-Faluting.”

Cromwell Argus, Volume III, Issue 142, 30 July 1872, Page 7

"High-Faluting.”

We are told that there was a paper in Cincinnati which was very much given to “ highfaluting” on the subject of “this great country,” until a rival paper somewhat modified its continual bounce with the following burlesque : —“ This is a glorious country ! It has longer rivers and more of them, and they are muddier and deeper, and run faster, and rise higher, and make more noise, and fall lower, and do more damage than anybody else’s rivers. It has more lakes, and they are bigger, and deeper, and clearer, and better, than those of any other country. Our rail-cars are bigger, and run faster, and pitch off the track oftener, and kill more people than all other rail-cars, in this and every other country. Our steamboats carry bigger loads, and are longer and broader, burst their boilers oftener, and send up their passengers higher, and the captains swear harder than steamboat captains in any other country. Our men are bigger, and longer, and thicker; can fight harder and faster, drink more mean whisky, chew more bad tobacco, and spit more, and spit farther than in any other country. Our ladies are richer, prettier, dress finer, spend more money, break more hearts, wear bigger hoops, shorter dresses, and kick up the devil generally to a greater extent than other ladies in all other countries. Our children squall louder, grow faster, get too expansive for their pantaloons, and become twenty years old sooner by some months than any other children of any other country on the earth. —Quarterly Review.