VARIETIES.

Cromwell Argus, Volume III, Issue 140, 16 July 1872, Page 3

VARIETIES.

We should not forget that life is a flower, which is no sooner blown than it begins to wither. A thoughtful observe'! - is puzzled by finding tint for a burlesque to be complexly successful, i must have a break-down. Gentlemen's spring hats will be very large this year, in order to accomodate the constantly increasing number of “swelled heads. A female justice of the peace in Wyoming ha s kept herself in pin-money for some time past by fining her husband in her official capacity whcn_ over he committed a domestic contempt of court A friend who did the Colorado mountains last Fall informed ns that he got ns ravenous as a raven among the ravines, and sat down in one of the gorgeous gorges and gorged himself. Tile ( 'infilllicit' I'n'inh'rr has a poet who does up all the little sensations that come along in liipiid measures, hut he tried it once too often. (;. ]■’. Train was his last subject, and the distinguished Mucking i’resident comes back on him : and his fraternity thus “ You miserable dogs ! What power lias your scurrilous pen ? You talk to a city of hogs ; 1 to a world of men.” The following pretty “ pome” is from the New j York Mcrcuri/: — i Fare undo, when i !’> hold nrc fasc, & gaize in two ure azlnir ize, j mi love is warmed in two a blaize ; & lliauts within mi buzom rise, two big for mi week tung two utter, | which leves mi hart awl in a Hatter 1” An ohl Dublin beggar-woman asked a lady the ! other day for a halfpenny. “ I’ve nothing for j you.” said the lady ; “ but if you go to the soup- | kitchen you’ll got a pint of excellent soup.”— 1 “Soup is it ye mans?” bawled the iiidigimat 1 mendicant; “do you call that stuff soup? Sure • and Til just tell you how they make it ! They I get a quart of water, and then b »il it down to a . pint, I" iii 'ikc it btrji'j. ’