WHIMSICAL NOTES.

Cromwell Argus, Volume III, Issue 139, 9 July 1872, Page 6

WHIMSICAL NOTES.

BY A COSMOPOLITAN - .

Cold weather ! I should rather think so. Why, the whisky and other spirituous liquors at the Nevis becai frozen up during the late severe frost: i ‘1 to be thawed by the “pubs.” befox'e the i; nbibition of nobblers could take place. 1? ‘ are incredulous, perhaps ; you think, V f likely, that what I have been talking abi jU, is far below proof. Well, it might be : I by report. Ask around for yourself.

New advertisements, to be thoroughly attractive in a small community, should not, I think, be exclusive. To omit soliciting the custom of a class who are the chief producers and mainstay of a gold-field, appears to me to be somewhat strange. Mayhap, the ignoring of the class above alluded to is attributable to the system of deferred payments so prevalent amongst them. It’s plain to me it’s very odd.

There is a time for all things. There is a time to sing, and a time to dance. This will apply to local entertainments, as well as to other sublunary affairs. Confirmatory of this opinion was a notification of an amateur performance that I lately saw, to the effect that dancing was to be kept separate from, and not to take place until after the concert. Vocalists at amusements of this kind should bear this in mind, and whilst carolling their lays, should refrain if possible from giving a break do ion.

Why, “Viator,” did you not let “AntiHumbug” alone, severely ? I should have done so, for I don’t like fault-finders. 1 don’t like folks who “ pish” and “ psha” at everything that does not emanate from themselves; nor have I any liking for those who, by endeavouring to show what they imagine to be foibles or failings in others, are only, in fact, tacitly aiming at their own commendation, and disclosing a secret vanity at their own powers of discernment. In short, I have a dislike to pragmatical old women of the “Anti-Humbug” class generally ; no, I am wrong ;it is not antipathy,—-it is pity. Poor bid gal!

What has become of those irresolute individuals, three sergeants and fourteen police constables, who, after refusing duty because when they “asked for more” their request was not acceded to, asked to be taken on again ! To show themselves so deficient in firmness, — a quality so essential to policemen,-—was only to jeopardise any previous reputation they may have had for energy and efficiency. Policemen are said to have a talcin') way with them ; but in this case, it seems, the Government was not to be had.

Making every allowance for the unpleasant position witnesses and others are placed in whilst under cross-examination by irascible lawyers, I still think that there is a deal of unnecessary hesitation and prevarication on the part of a number of persons, in giving their evidence before a magistrate. Many seem to me to look upon a lawyer as an enemy, and accordingly come to Court fully prepared, as they think, to resist attack by means of the weapon fines, sc, and of which after aU they make but a bungling use. When I see a man who has occupied the

valuable time of the Court with his chicane, emerging from the Court-house with a selfsatisfied air, and a smile of self-approbation on his countenance, mycholer begins to rise ; for I detest what is now-a-days called smartness. I feel inclined, almost, to then-ami there expostulate with him, and recommend for his especial edification the study of Nature, advising him to initiate proceedings by studying the nature of an oath.

Shouting is undoubtedly a bad practice. 1 If you shout in the public-houses of Cromj well, you will probably be designated “not j a bad sort, after all.” If, from an exhilaral tion of animal spirits, you shout in the pub--1 lie streets theref, you will very likely be the I cause of giving temporary employment to a I stalwart guardian of the peace. Both systems are expensive. In the one case, you | have control over your disbursements ; in j the other, there is a certain charge made, — I which is not altogether compulsory ; for thci e 'is an option, although it may not be a very [agreeable one. Especially avoid the latter, i this bitterly cold weather ; for I have heard | that blankets arc scarce in a certain portion <>f the Government buildings. I hope such I is not the case, for it must be something teri rihle to shiver and shudder through the livej long night, in a skeleton of a building, with j insufficient covering.