A FUNNY MISCHANTRE.

Clutha Leader, Volume IV, Issue 197, 19 April 1878, Page 6

A FUNNY MISCHANTRE.

(By North.) I hae often promist tae write oot for yer paper ony bits o' news that micht come under ma personal observation, but leevin' as I am in sic an oot-o'-the-wy corner its no aften I hear o' onything worth prentin'. When I dae happen tae hear o' onything the pen is no aye reddy tae my hand', an' ! sometimes, tae tell the truth, I'm no aye in the 'umour o' writin'. A sma' bit o' amistak', hoosomever, was mentioned in my lug the ither day, an' I think it may be worth tellin'. It appears a Kaitangatae man had been up inthetoonship in the afternoon on some coal business. Jist whan he was aboot tae leave for hame, he, as luck wad hae it, forgather' d wi' an " auld cronnie" frae Warepa, an' of coorse they maun hae " a gill" thegether. First the ane ca'ed in the waiter, then the ither, an' they had drappy after drappy until they werna fu' but just had plenty. They were "just a kind o' canty wys. The oors flew past unkennin' tae them, until nicht set in, an' it was geyan dark. They ordered oot their pownies, an' after partakin' o' the " stirrup cup," they hirstled on their beasts, gie'd each ither a hearty shake o' the haun', said gude nicht a dizzen o' times, when ilka ane took his am gaet an' jogged awa' hame. The Kaitangatae man hadna'gaen far when he thocht he had ta'en mair then he slmd hae dune, or else there wis something wrang wi' his shalt. It didna seem as if it was gaen hame ; it wasna' sac speerity like as it generally was when its held was turned tae Kaitangatae; its step was 1 anger an' no sac steddy ; the bridle rein hadna the same grip some wy ; his seat didna feel sac siccar, an' he jaloused something was wrang, but he cudna tell very weel what it was. Instead o' his shalt takin' the straught road hame as fast as it cud, an' as it used tae dae, it seemed inclined tae explore , the bye-ways an' hedges, an' even tae turn roond if it were alloo'd a chance. " Dod, beast," says he, " what's the .maite'r wi' ye," an' wi' that he taks' her a skelp wi' his whup, a proceedin' that nearly had the effeck o' landin' him in a side ditch, an' he therefore didna repeat the chasteezement, but just shachled hame the best wy he cud. Havin' got tae the stable door he took his shalt bi' the heid an' led it in, striket a match an' examined it a' roond. " Losh keep me," says he, " I've stown a mere, or she's stown me ; that's no ma mere ava. That accoonts for her camsteery wys, and me, fule at I was, I was maist thinkin' I had ta'en a drap ower muckle. But we's pet ye up for the nicht an' see what the morn '11 bring forth." So sayin' he carefully rubbed doon an' supper'd the beast, an' retired to explain maiters at hame the best wy he cud. His ' betterhalf condoled wi' him upon his misfortin', an' said she wad hae a look at the stable in the mornin'. With this intent she was up betimes, an' tae the stable she went, when she was sorely dumfoon'ered tae find their am mere a' richt, only very het, as if she had just cam' aff a journey, when she had been ridden like mad. The mystery was noo inexplicable, an' neither pairty cud scarcely believe their am een. There was the mere. The gnidman said it wasna her he had last nicht. The guidwife asked him what he was drinkin' ; said there was the mere, but hoo was she sac het 1 The matter remained a mystery till next day, when the guidman made anither earand tae Balclutha, an' wha shud he happen tae meet bit his "auld cronny" frae Warepa. " Man," say he, " I'm gled I've met ye ; hoo did ye get hame yon nicht ?" "0, fine," says he, " bit fat gar't ye flee awa' wi ! ma shalt in sic a hurry." "Me flee awa' wi' yer shalt ! Ye was awa' afore me an' took aff my shalt, an' I was obieeg'd tae tak' yours; bit hoo did ye get her back ?" "O, I sent doon for her early in the mornin' sac that yer guidwife michtna' ken, because I thocht she micht be like tae gi'e ye yer kail throngh the reek." Thus the mystery was solved, an' the twa retired tae Wully Lloyd's an' had " a hair o' the cat that scartet them/ an' pairted the best o' frien's.