THE POST STOPS HERE No candles, light bulbs, oilskins, caviar — by order

Press, 24 June 1983, Page 16

THE POST STOPS HERE No candles, light bulbs, oilskins, caviar — by order

PETER TAYLOR

Advice to those about to send jonquils to Tristan da Cunha, rags to Iceland, pen-holders to Sri Lanka or, come to that, anything anywhere ... don’t. At least, not until you have consulted the Post Office Guide. You will be surprised at what you are not allowed to send abroad.

I can understand just about every country objecting to firearms, drugs, and precious stones, but why should Guyana object to artificial Christmas trees? Or Guatemala to books addressed to commercial banks for ultimate delivery to a second addressee? I can hazard a guess as to why the Niger Republic objects to counters resembling coins, but why do they take a dim view of preserved plums? Kampuchea will have no truck with baby feeders fitted with tubes; Kenya has a thing about scout or guide badges. Fiji absolutely forbids birds’ nests intended for human consumption but will allow up to 10 kilograms of snuff. El Salvador will entertain neither contraceptives nor cigarette papers. Egypt prohibits anything to do with absinthe and frowns on electric light bulbs, gas masks, and chalk for children’s games.

The People’s Republic of the Congo, while restricting potatoes and gramophone records, absolutely prohibits candles. Lesotho and the United States, among others, will not admit goods made by prison labour; the Democratic Republic of Somalia will accept wedding cakes “only if they are carefully packed in tin boxes,” but on no account may you send oilskins to South Africa or Namibia'.

You may send a gift parcel once a month to the People’s Democratic Republic of Yemen (provided it does not contain sulphur), but only three times a year to the People’s Socialist Republic of Albania (provided you do not include articles “prejudicial to the State and to public order,” or saccharine).

There is no way Taiwan will accept sharks’ fins, caviar, tinsel, asparagus or lemonade; and Papua New Guinea will not accept a bottle of shampoo. Whatever you send to Saudi Arabia, whether by letter or parcel, must bear the full name of Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, but even that is not sufficient if you are silly enough to send any type of musical instrument or articles of nonMoslem worship. Nothing to Turkey must bear any additions to the address, such as Asia Minor or Armenia, and you must not use Constantinople instead of Istanbul or Smyrna instead of Izmir. Otherwise your package will languish forever in some forgotten corner or, as the Post Office Guide more euphemistically puts it, it will be “subject to the risks of non-delivery.”

Kuwait and the United Arab Emirates are similarly sensitive about names; Afghanistan will not accept anything which may “compete with retail industries.” Australia has a prejudice against parcels and letters bearing the word ANZAC.

Bangladesh will not admit pinkcoloured quinine, India and Bhutan prohibit Mexican jumping beans, and Brazil prohibits primary educational books not entirely written in Portuguese. The Republic of Colombia will not accept cork, umbrellas, or articles made of aluminium, and Cuba will not admit binoculars, spare parts for motor scooters, spectacles, or chewing gum.

In fact, in the case of Cuba it is a good idea to ascertain first from the addressee whether anything you wish to send will be admitted.

France will have no truck with funeral urns, horse chestnuts, or chain letters; the German Democratic Republic will not accept Post Office savings books issued in the republic, or illegible notes, incomprehensible drawings, or invisible ink.

Indonesia prohibits stopwatches or anything printed in Chinese characters or language. Of Iran, like Cuba, the Post Office Guide says simply: “Many articles being prohibited, senders are advised to ascertain before posting whether their goods are admissible.” In any case, your postage will take your parcel only as far as Iranian frontier posts because “charges for conveyance into the interior are levied.”

If you wish to send something to Israel by airmail you must present it at a post office counter for inspection and endorsement that it is safe for transmission. Even having satisfied that condition, you must not in any case send loudspeakers to the West Bank of the Jordan or the Gaza region. Iraq will not accept confectionery containing “whisky or other foreign beverages,” walkie-talkie radios, or rubber balls. Sri Lanka will not allow account books, ashtrays, carbon paper, envelopes, exercise books, picnic baskets, key rings, sunglasses, pens, pencils, or wire-clips, to name but a fraction of the list.

Russia will allow as a gift one new overcoat, three sets of underwear, 12 gramophone records, among other things — but no chewing gum. You will need an import licence for more than one copy of a matchbox label, and a permit to send some slides or photographs, although you will not get a licence if the material is in any way prejudicial to Soviet policies or the economy.

Calendars to Venezuela will cost the recipient 20 bolivars per kilogram net weight, and you may send only 80 razor blades a year to China otherwise you need an import licence. The list of prohibitions and restrictions goes on and on. But, apparently, it’s all too much for the People’s Republic of Mongolia. “Parcel Post:” the guide says, “No Service.”