HUMOUR AWHEEL.

Press, Volume LXIII, Issue 19155, 11 November 1927, Page 4

HUMOUR AWHEEL.

"Have you heard the latest P Mrs Fisher walks in" her sleep!" "How perfectly absurd when they have three cars."—"Th© Passing Show." * * # Jones: Sorry, old man, that my hen gotloose and scratched np your garden. Smith: That's all right; my dog ate your hen. Jones: Fine! I just ran over your dog. * # * The more patient pedestrians, the fewer pedestrian patients. * * * Making traffic jams is about the nearest most girls get to cooking.

'•Hey, mister! Yer engine's smokin'." i "Well, it's old enough to." * * * There are times when the road is good, and the moon is bright, and the engine purring, when the difference between heaven and earth is the thickness of your brake lining. * * * Traffjc Cop: "Can't you see the sign is turned against you ?" Driver: "I know, but I wanted to get a head start on the others." * * * Judge: "Why did you run down this man in broad daylight on a*perfectly straight stretch of road?" Prisoner; "Your Honour, my windshield was almost totally obscured by safety stickers." * * * Bill thought the gas was getting low; He struck a match; the tank let go! Bill snilcd three mi'es right in the air; Three miles on a pint is pretty fair. * * * There may be no real saturation point in the automobile market, but we're seen it in some drivers. * # * Motorist: "Where do you get spare parts around here?" Native: "At the railway crossing." * # * A prospective buyer walked into a garage and said to the proprietor: "I would like to see a really first-class second-hand car." "So would I, brother," was the reply. 7r # 4fr Marriage License Clerk: "But, lady, the law requires that I record all previous marriages before issuing a new license." Movie Actress: "Good heavens. And I've a taxi waiting outside." * # * A book has been published telling motorists what to do in cases of emer* gencv. As, for instance, when the traffic policeman accepts vour story that the speedometer was only showing ten miles an hour.