WOT! CHAD’S HERE!

Bay of Plenty Beacon, Volume 10, Issue 73, 15 January 1947, Page 4

WOT! CHAD’S HERE!

APPEARANCE IN WHAKATANE

SINISTER GREMLIN ARRIVES

The most sinister of all gremlins, Mr Chad has arrived in Whakatane. He has been seen in several places in both borough and county and with his typically terse comments on various things, or rather the lack of various things, is regarded in higher circles as a definite danger to everything associated with the life of residents in the community. With the startling appearance of his inquisitive countenance (first reported'by Yoo-Hoo), we went to many pains and much research to discover some of the history of Mr Chad, and with the idea that forewarned is forearmed, we impart this information, and advise readers to be constantly on the alert. Mr Chad apparently originated in Europe, but due no doubt to the difficult conditions on the Continent, removed himself in short time to England where'during the last few months particularly, he has run wild. Almost everywhere one looks, according to reports, is the quizzical face of Chad peering over his fence and delivering himself of some acid comment. For the benefit of those who have as yet been fortunate enough not to meet him, here is a description: Chad always appears as the top half of a face with a very long nose. A line, which represents the top of a fence bisects his features, and allows, him -to show his face only from the eyes up, although his long nasal organ hangs over the fence. (The ‘fence’ line conveniently excuses the artist from drawing the lower portion of the face). The outline of his fingers hooked over the fence give the impression that Chad is just too short to see over properly, and must hoist himself up a little in order to peer at doings on the other side. And underneath this figure is inevitably scrawled some caustic comment.

People in England have become heartily fed up with Chad and his sayings. In almost every public place is Chad, asking: “Wot! No cigarettes!”, “Wot! No beer!”, “Wot! No demob!” (in Army camps) etc. One which puzzled Scotland Yard was Chad gazing down from an alley wall at the body of a murdered Polish airman, and asking “Wot! No body!” (Perhaps the killer, with a distorted sense of humour intended removing the body or he may even have been referring to himself). In any case, Chad alone apparently witnessed the deed. And this same Chad has been seen right here in Whakatane! In several places he has been observed peering over his fence and commenting caustically on various items. Once he has gained a foothold, there is no telling what may eventuate. In the meantime, we can only warn residents to keep their eyes and ears open, and to have nothing whatsoever to do with the one and only gremlin who has entered civil life—the infamous Mr Chad.