HOME GUARD IN THE HAY

Bay of Plenty Beacon, Volume 2, Issue 244, 2 December 1940, Page 4

HOME GUARD IN THE HAY

Sir,—ln - your leading article last week you throw out the hint that Whakatane Borough Home Guardsmen should get into training by motoring out to the farms and wrestling, with the hay.. A* Jolly good idea Mr Editor! No dotibt you will have a of Home Guardsmen in front of the Beacon Office, joyous at the prospect of driving out to Farmer Brown's hayfield, tossing the hay about with pitchforks (and imagining that every forkful of hay is the corpse of Hitler and/or Goeringor Mussolini. Jolly good bayonet practice for those Avho may hiave to wait a long while to be issued with real rifles and bayonets, and who find dueling with broomsticks for rifles too much like playing Boy Scouts or getting back to second childhood!. Then when hay-tossing becomes too tiring there will be "refreshments'* —you stress the free eats in your leader. How good for the Home Guardsmen to recline in the shade of the haystack or wire fence while Mrs Farmer Brown and/or lier charming daughters hand round samples of their home cooking! Then at the close of the day Farms* er Brown beckons the Home Guardsmen to a "dugout" where he has a can of free benzine for the Guards men's car and another onei with three X's for human consumption. As the shades of evening fall the Regiment rolls home singing *Roli out the Barrel," "The More we are To-gether," and "How Dry We Are'* —and lets hope the local traffic officer is not on duty. It all reads well. All that is now wanting is to see it working. How many of your Borough 5 and 6 day week workers really keen tb do a solid day's work in. the hayfields? We shall see. Perhaps many of them will'find, that they, have to* miss the hayfield parade in order to go into the Strand and "sink a few" (not enemy- submarines). There are also the henpecked Guards

men who have to stay home on Saturdays and Sundays to beat the carpets and bath the canaries for. their "stern spouses. It seems to be taken for granted by- you, Mr Editor. that there will be plenty .of hay for Saturday and Sunday* iharvasting. Just too bad if the farmer sits down waiting ; for his Home. Guard helpers all the-; five week days and then it rains on Saturday and Sunday. These are some of, the difficulties which, together -with the road fence,. have to be surmounted before your Borough Home Guardsmen get into the hay. Still here's hoping,. , ( ' Yours etc., UP TO THE EARS IN HAY.