BAY OF PLENTY TIMES. “The spirit of the times shall teach me speed.” KING JOHN, ACT IV. SATURDAY, APRIL 12, 1873.

Bay of Plenty Times, Volume I, Issue 64, 12 April 1873, Page 2

BAY OF PLENTY TIMES. “The spirit of the times shall teach me speed.” KING JOHN, ACT IV. SATURDAY, APRIL 12, 1873.

Pivina Service wm f < id ye*terdav (Good Friday) morning at the Chapel. The Kev Mr Jordr.n pre-mhe ) a most imnressive sermon suitable to the occasion. Yt'sferdav evening, at the Roman Catholic Chapel, after prayers .(specially appointed for use in commemoration of this solemn day) were said, the Keverend Father delivered a most < '■ quent discourse. A meeting of the mem hers of the Tauranga Light Horse will take place this evening at the Tau ran 2a Hotel. The Secretary announces " business of importance." " '\ The committee elected at the meet;,:;? he'd last week for the purpose of petitioning tlie Governnient to subsidise a line of coache.» from here to Taupo, to comuet with the line from Taupo to Napier, consenting of Captain* T links, Norris, and Skeet, and Messrs Edgoumbe and F George, met at Captain NorrU's stolen Tuesday a. i VtVdneedcy afternoons. Or. *':> motion of Captain Norru\, seconded by Tucks, Mr Edgcumbe

nr elevted chair! , nan of rr following memorial, setting forth the » re at J he eitj of overland postal communication £ w?**' was drawn tip. and the chairman requeetef?* take the necessary steps for obtaining $ ° to the same—committee bearing tlm ~ lure ® ‘■To the Honorable ,h« Zealand. —The memorial of the • ew inhabitants of Tauranga, Bay of PlonH. u ‘ gne<i sheweth,-!. That, 1 Tauranga and Taupo i 8 now comm ef „s Tf 6n opening up direct communication with N«! • * stock-producing district between which luTt ’ a ranga a considerable trade has already K established. Your petitioners are of opinion regular _ coach communication between the 7*' places is necessary. 2. That two coach runs regularly from Napier to proprietor of which is assisted in bis enll' h 9 by a subsidy from the Government. 3 road on tho Tauranga side of Taur~ rA- -• tjtbe a fertile district (the lands of tL"^ 0 owners are quite willing to dispose of), and easy means of access to several considerableSf* ments which, though hitherto eatiiSy now becoming peopled by Europeans, to whom ! regular postal service would be of great 4. That the road has been driven over by jJ! n G. Quick, of the firm of Cobb and On f •,* contractors for the Waikato), who states that service between Tauranga and Napier mav i performed m three davs. 5 That 7 petuioners beHeving that" not only this distS but the whole of the southern portion of t province of Auckland would be benefited bv an overland mail to Tauranga. a seaport in reoukr communication with Auckland and other lari cities humbly pray that a subsidy may be graced for the extension to Tauranga of the mail service at present existing between Napier and Tauno And your petitioners, as in duty bound, &c., & c .” * The Jewish festival of “The Passover” commenced yesterday evening, and will continue for eight days. The first evening i 8 observed by a particular ceremony, consisting of prayers beL said and four glasses of wine being drank made from raisons, all the household (Jews) are supposed to sit at the same table, no matter how servile their condition may be. During the Passover no leavened bread is allowed : a cake oval shape, made from flour and water, is usuahv prepared. Spirits and malt liquors are forbidden. The Passover is a festival that is kept in the mod distant regions of the world. It dates from the time when Pnaroah kept the Jews in bondage when, after continual promises to allow theroto leave, be was stricken with ten plagues, consisting of the water being turned into blood, of frogs lice hail locusts, Wains, flies, murrain, darkm- - and the slaying of every first-born. From ah these plagues the Jews allege they did not suffer. They were at last allowed to depart, when Scripture tells us Pharaoh regretted their so doing, and toliowed them with some thousands of men. By a miracle, we learn, the Jews passed through the Kiver Jordan, the sea standing as a wall. Pharaoh trying to pass, the sea recovered its usual state and thousands were drowned. The Jews, then’ on their travels baked this unleavened bread: hence the comnaemoration of this great festival. The next Jewish holiday is the Pentecost, which Gates 49 days from the first day of Passover. A correspondent, signing himself “ Asmodeus,” writes as follows I was at the great Douglas meeting the other night, and stayed till long after my usual bed time. On reflection, it appears to me that ‘ RatepayerV letter must have been a very clever one, as so many clever people had to disown the authorship. The real author may well crow over the success of his little squib, and —if he were present at the meeting—laugh in bis sleeve to find his literary effort attributed to men of such mark. Let him consider that pretty well all the wits in the place found it necessary to deny the soft impeachment. It was declared not to b,e an effusion of blue blood ; it was dramatically denied by Mr George, repudiated by Mr Bennet, ignored by Captain Norris, and indignantly spurned by Captain Skeet. “ Ratepayer ” evidently made a hit, for Mr Douglas was palpably sore on the subject. Truly, your humble servant seriously feared there was going to be no meeting at all, till Lieutenant Samuels came to the rescue, and said, in other words, ' Never mind “ Ratepayer”, explain.’ The explanation was certainly funny. Innocent constituents then, for the first time. learnt how M.P.O.'s amused themselves by playing at legislation, at a time when they were supposed to be engrossed in weighty affairs—- “ big with the fate of empires and of Rome.” No such thing. The business of the Provincial Council appears to be very monotonous, and only rendered f durable by means of legislative sky* larking and moving * fancy motions,’ as they were designated by our honourable member. Still, many a true word is spoken in jest, and many a joke has a serious consequence; so ah Douglas craftily followed his joke up by ‘lrving it on* with the Provincial Secretary. For this ha deserved three cheers, a vote of confidence, and thanks included. But what does he care for that? lie said it was a matter of indifference to him whether or not his constituents applauded his conduct : he hud it (meaning the approval of his conscience) in the region of his breast pocket, which ho smote with fervour. It has often struck tno with admiration to witness the elevated morality and dignity which seem to follow political eminence. The candidate —who previously had not been above turning on honest penny by, I will not say hook or crouk —suddenly becomes transformed into a p iragoti of virtue. He inline* diately becomes a social reformer, finds it his duty to support Permissive Bills Education Acts, &c. Not that be objects to the people's “innocent Btnusemeufc, but the public morals must be attended to.” What acute interest does he not suddenly feel in the welfare of the working man. How many hands will he not shake from which he otherwise would have recoiled ? What greetings in the market place to folks whom he would otherwise not have known. No man is then too humble, ao coat too shabby, hat or boots too dilapidated for recognition, or hands too dirty to snake, I conceive, therefore, that politics must be an ennobling pursuit, particularly when R raises its ioiiowers to the sublime degree of sad-* faction indicated by a self-inflicted pat on the chest, Tho question still remains—Who is ‘ .Ratepayer’ ? As be has not disclosed himself*

wc a , a y fancy him a village Hampden, a hidden genius, and safely dub him the Great Unknown. Air Douglas thought ho should hare ‘come forward,’ advanced two paces to the front, and, smiting himself on the breast, exclaimed. ‘ Behold the man !’ I think differently. Mr ‘ Ratepayer’ v iU do more wisely to stay behind the scenes, whence he can administer a sly poke when he feels inclined to do so. _ Once rob him of his incognito, and his mana is gone,” How is it that offences against the person are l egs fiercely avenged than those against property ? It is scarcely to be supposed that such is the result of judicial inadvertence, and perhaps there tnaT be some good reason, which the lay mind is incapable of appreciating. Here are eight congecutive lines from a late issue of the Argus, which illustrates our difficulty. They are part of the precis of the sentences passed by his Honor Mr Justice Fellows. — “ Peter Dooley, charged with unlawfully and maliciously inflicting bodily injury by biting a portion of the nose off a man with whom he was quarreliing, was found guilty, and sentenced to two years’ imprisonment with hard labour. Thomas Davis was then charged with stealing £lO, and being proved guilty was sentenced to four years’ hard labour.” "There are two ways in which the cases here placed in juxtaposition may be regarded. Is £5 the measure of value of a man’s nose? Or, had the carnivorous Mr Dooley bitten off the noses of two men, would he, under these circumstances, have received from Mr Justice Fellows as severe a sentence as if he had stolen a £lO note P Apart from the brutality of the offence, who would put into the same £lO scale and noselessness ? A number of counterfeit sovereigns are said to be in circulation in Auckland, and it is possible gome will And their way to Taurauga. People should be careful in taking this com. Some people must see an extraordinary amount of pleasure in the act of destruction. The walls of the Telegraph Office display several printed notices on various matters interesting to the public, and our funny men do not seem to think them correct, for all sorts of - alterat ions are made by the erasure of or addition of words. Large pieces of some of the notices are cut out with some apparent trouble, while others are altered to suit these funny men. The General Manager’s name which figures at the bottom of most of the notices, appears f o be a capital subject for wit, and accordingly Lemon-syrup, Lemon-ade, Lemonpudding, and other signatures appear as those of the urbane manager. It is a pity the idiots cannot find something better to do. Tbe other day a well-known resident was met on tbe beach in a sad state of mental aberration. It is believed he lost his mind in trying to remember and deliver the parting message of bis wife, who on kissing him good-bye in the morning told him to “ go to the dressmaker and tell her that she (the wife) had changed her mind, and would have the watered silk made up instead of the poplin, and be sure and tell her,” said the wife, “ that if she thinks it would look better with ten bias flounces without puffing, and box-plating below the equator, which should bo gathered in hem-stitched gudgeons up and down the seams, with gusset-stitch between, she can make it up in that way instead of fluting the bobbinet Insertion, and piecing out with point applique, as I suggested yesterday.” The recent appointment of five nore gentlemen as Justices of the Peace led the livening Fast to remark that the appointment of Justices of tbe Peace in batches proceeds with unabated vigour.” The following sentences are from the Gospel of Agriculture , by John li. Hayes : “ How long, ye shallow ploughers, will it take to learn you the lesson that one acre deep-ploughed and wellcultivated will produce nearly double what two acres will shallow-ploughed and neglected? Farmers plough deep, subsoil go twice in a furrow, thoroughly mix and incorporate your manure with the soil, use the harrow, keep the soil completely and continually stirred and pulverised, and you shall reap such a reward as shallow ploughers have never dreamed of.” Great complaints are being made by many of our contemporaries at the inefficiency of some of the telegraph officials. No doubt the complaint ■ ts justifiable, but none of those who have written j on the subject appear to have looked at the question from a proper light. In tbe first place the majority of those who send and receive telegrams are boys ; this no doubt is done for economy. Further, the adults of the department, are worse paid than a linen-draper’s assistant. If good servants are to be secured, they must be adequately paid. Waikato Times, Am exchange says:—“An unknown man broke through the ice at Bay City, Michigan, last winter, and his faithful dog has sat watching the hole ever since, refusing food, company, or to be coaxed away,” Now, this can be made a very pathetic little story of; but, as it comes to us, it I® susceptible of being made quite the reverse. For instance (he account does not state whether dm man was drowned or not. He may have dodged down one hols and up another some distance away, just to get rid of that dog; or he ought have come up out of the same hole again, but so wet and unstarched that the dog did not know him. In fact, there are several inferences that may be drawn. But we presume those hard-hearted Bay City people will allow that faithful dog to sit there on the ice watching that bole all summer. F’>ght little Parliaments! The following epigram on the Provincial Governments of New £eaiand has only to be read to be appreciated : Does John ever look to the state of his till, VVith eight little Senates to run up tbe bill ? _ ocs John ever think that the work might be done y eight little Senates rolled into one? Jght little Parliaments, sitting in state—--jg'st little Speakers, and Ministers eight—• All sit to show* they need never have sat; n d Sue country grows lean as officials grow fat. We (Wan ganui Herald) learn that the Government lately determined to appoint no more gentlemen to the Commission of the Peace until the issue of a fresh rob, which may be shortly expected, purged of all impurities, bankrupts, ® e -» and containing the names of gentlemen well qualified to discharge the duties devolving on those holding the honorary appointments.

tl.r ,T . wnte r haa said thst some men move hrough ife as a bund of music moves throm-h he street, flinging out pleasure on ew,v S -cl”‘iuten he l ° ***** ° ne * faP ami Glut bome fin the air with their a * jv * sweetness, as thn women air with the ri P e Some omen cling to their own houses like the honeysuckle over the door; yet, like it, fill ull the region with the subtle fragrance of their goodne,h° W / re T ; :i '? ,jun l- v blessing is it so" to hold it royal gifts of the soul that they shall be nmsic to some, fragrance to others, ami'afo to all - d bG n ° U!lW ° rth - v thin K Hvo for, to make the power wmch wa have within us the breath of other men’s joys ; to fill the atmosphere which they must stand in, with a brDhtne«s which they cannot create for themselves. " We are suffering from an attack of Aurora Australis, and ns “fellow feeling makes us wondrous kind,’ we give our readers the direct cause ot our complaint as it appeal eth in a late Victorian exchange When the melofygistic temperature ot the horizon is such as to caloricise the imminent indentation of the hemisphere by analogy, the cohesion of the borax curbirtus becomes surcharged with infinitesimals, which are thereby vu unify deprived of their fi- urial disquisition. This eiiected.a rapid change is produced in the thorambumptor of the gympastlcutus pa lor him, winch causes a convacular in hegogonial antipathies of the terrestrium aqua vernsli. The clouds then become a mass of deodorised speeul of ceremocular light, which can only be seen when it is visible.” People do not laugh now-a-davs—they iuduhm in merriment. They don’t walk—they promenade. They never eat food—they masticate it. Nobody has a tooth‘pulled out—they have it extracted. Young men do not go courting girls they pay young ladies attention. It is vulgar to visit anyone—you must make a call. Of course you would not think of going to bed—you would retire to rest. Nor would you build a house—you would erect it. One buys drugs at a “ medical hall,” wines at a “company,” and shoes at, a “ mart.” Blacking is dispensed at an “ institution,” and meat from a “purveyor.” One would imagine that the word “shop” had become not only contemptible, but had been discovered to belong to the -English. Now-a-days all the shops are “ warehouses ” and “ bazaars,” and you will hardly find a man who baa the hardihood to call himself a shopkeeper. Reporters have become like bagmen, “ representatives preachers are “ministers” or “clergy,” workpeople are “employees,” tea meetings are “ soirees,” and singers are “ artists.” | We clip the following funeral dirge from a late < American publication • Will had a purple monkey climbing on a yellow stick. And when he sucked the paint ail off it made him j deathly sick ; And in his latest hours he clasped that monkey in his hand, And bid good-bye to earth and went into a better land. Oh ! no more he’ll shoot his sister with his little wcoden gun ; And no more he’ll twist the pussy’s tail and make her yowl for fun. i The pussy's tail now stands out straight, the gun j is laid aside, j The monkey doesn’t jump around since little Willie died.’