"BE FRANK!"

Auckland Star, Volume LIX, Issue 225, 22 September 1928, Page 4 (Supplement)

"BE FRANK!"

"TYRANNY" OF MARRIED

WOMEN.

HUMBUG?

(By E. ARNOT ROBERTSON in the

"Daily Express.")

What an admirable thing it would be (or the world in general if it wen possible—alas, it isn't, I am afraid, at this stage of civilisation—to take away from the married woman those little social advantages which she now enjoys; precedence at formal functions, added consideration in public, the position of moral arbiter in particular—rail the privileges and outward show which bolster up the idea that a married woman is somehow superior to one who bas stayed single, either by choice or by fate. And aren't we married women only too ready to believe it?—though why, goodness knows! If ever one hears a really merciless udgment on some other, less fortunate, voman, isn't the • betting that the ipeaker is a young married woman, imugly secure in her own position, and letermined —unconsciously perhaps, but eJentlessly determined all the same— hat whatever freedom she may be nissing by being settled so early in ife, at any rate other women shall not *njoy it with impunity if she can help t? Who is most unforgiving and unsympathetic over the smallest moral teccadilloes of her servants? —the virtues married woman, of course. No one dse dares, as a rule, to be as harsh as he can be on occasions, because no one lse enjoys the same immunity from riticism. ' Humbug! Through generations of humbug her losition has become, in some incom irehensible manner, endowed with a ■And of sanctity; and while.for other vomen there is usually the feeling hat the world in general might just onceivably be in the position of turnng round and saying, "Yes, and what bout you, now?" one day, if she is too incharitable, there is none of that for he impeccably married. It is a pity, I think. To refrain from hrowing stpnes, because at. some future late one might accidentally get into a flass house oneself, may not be a very loble reason *for being kindly and inderstanding, but if it results in less tones being thrown in a world already oo full of flying missiles, that seems o me to be good enough as a justificaion of the feeling. I have met instance after instance of hat pillar of the nation, the respectable British matron, who insists that her roung maids must be in by ten on their ■vening out, because, she says vaguely >ut rigidly, "it is better for them." It toes not matter that this prevents their foing to the pictures with their young nen; in fact, that is really the point of he rule. They have no business to have roung men, in her opinion. "I always ;ry to dissuade my servants from get ing married," one woman told me with ielf-complacency., "They're much bet ;er off in service in a really nice house. is I tell them. And it's such a nuisance or me to get fresh ones if they go." Pathetic cases in the law Courts, in vhich some wretched woman is at ault, attract a good deal of attention n the newspapers on account of what s called "the human interest," but "the nhuman interest" would be a much iietter title for the delight taken by some women, watching from the Olympian heights of their own safety, in the ove troubles of others. Sacred Rights. In one very recent case I remember i letter suggesting that a term of imprisonment was the proper punishment, lot only for the erring males, but also u every instance for "the heartless iome-breakers," as the writer collectively described all the "other women," who are, every often, most unwilling joulders in the path of other people's iappiness. But no exceptions were made, and the writer signed herself simply "A Married Woman." 'Most illuminating! rhis called forth another letter of warm ipproval from a second well-established lady, pointing out complacently that for 'these useless women," as she called them—(What women? "Those who have not been as successful as I have in assuring their respectability" was what she really meant, only that she had not the nerve to say so)—nothing Would act as » better deterrent than the prospect of losing some of the period when their looks were a valuable asset in an instituion. where they would not be appreciated, »nd so minimising their future chances! I must say that the groundlessly selfionfident manner adopted by so many married women must be a great incentive to the unattached to' try to shake jut security a little, via our husbands. And if they succeed, serve us right in the majority of cases. We go about simply asking for it, with the air of issumed superiority. Be Honest! The disapproval of the tribunal of the married, expressed without any reasons being given, can very often bar ;he way of a younger woman in society iltogetber. Do let us try to be honest withourselves for a moment; what are we but those who have, in each case, nanaged. to strike a harder bargain with iome man than other and less fortunate women have been able to do? If the world feels that it owes us iome sort of respect, by all means let it respect us, frankly, as better business women, since we. have secured ' more idvantageous terms for ourselves from i world inclined to deal hard with women is they grow older. It makes me tired to see other married women going about with an air of having done something sxtraordinarily Jever, which gives them the right' sot only to extra cop ideration in hundreds of little ways, but more {specially to judge Others—mercilessly it that! .. . 'L./' - r